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Is it weird to suggest living with a friend?

45 replies

657904I · 05/06/2025 14:31

My friend and I have been close since school, we are mid 20s. I earn £50k and rent alone. I’m single so independently cover all bills etc.

My friend moved in with her partner and his entire family - including his parents, grandparents, brother, his wife, their kids. She wants her own place but her partner doesn’t want to move out of his parent’s home. So basically she decided to leave him.

I’m wondering if it would be weird if I suggest to her that we live together for a bit?

Maybe like rent together for a year. My thought process is we trust each other and can split bills which would allow us to save money. Plus it might give her time to figure out her relationship and might give me time to meet someone, and in the meantime we would have fun living together. I just worry that it’s not the done thing so feel like it might be weird to suggest.

OP posts:
TrousersOfTime · 05/06/2025 14:33

Why not? One of my friends lived with me for about 5 years up until recently (we're still great friends) - we're in our 30s

LogicalBlodge · 05/06/2025 14:40

I lived with 3 girls in a flat for a year when I was in my late 20s!

I never realised how my hormones affected me but we learned to tell where everyone was in their period cycle. Someone would be grumpy and stressed for what looked like no apparent reason. Then it would another one of us.

So I think one flatmate sounds ideal 😅

IdLikeABackMassage · 05/06/2025 14:41

It's a lovely idea

Blueberrycake12 · 05/06/2025 14:42

Why would it be weird?

Annascaul · 05/06/2025 14:43

Not weird at all. Go for it.

Firsttimebabymummy · 05/06/2025 14:44

Not weird at all.

TeeBee · 05/06/2025 14:46

This scenario is completely normal...particularly at your age. I suspect it will become a lot more popular across all age-bands with the cost of living crisis.

MounjaroMounjaro · 05/06/2025 14:46

It's not weird at all. Do you have a spare room? What about a bathroom - would you be happy to share? Did she go away to uni or did she ever live with others?

You could just say, "If you fancy it, you could move in with me and we could split the bills, just until you know what you want to do." You never know, she might end up getting back with her partner anyway.

milkandblackspiders · 05/06/2025 14:49

I lived with friends for most of my 20's, most other people I knew were the same. Don't you know other people your age who live with friends?

floppybit · 05/06/2025 14:50

I shared with mates for years in various houses when I was younger, I thought this was completely standard.

657904I · 05/06/2025 14:58

milkandblackspiders · 05/06/2025 14:49

I lived with friends for most of my 20's, most other people I knew were the same. Don't you know other people your age who live with friends?

Thanks everyone.

Just to explain why I think it’s weird, it might be a geographical thing. I think it’s normal to live with friends as I used to live in London. My friend also lived in uni halls when she went to uni.

But in the area where we currently live, it’s more the done thing to buy a house with your partner. People don’t really live with friends here, so I guess she might see it as regressing

OP posts:
Wynter25 · 05/06/2025 15:00

My friend is currently living with me atm. It works :)

ConcernedOfClapham · 05/06/2025 15:03

I think it’s more weird her moving in with four generations of a family that wasn’t hers. However big was that house?!?

Beenaboutabit · 05/06/2025 15:04

It would almost be weird not to

MrsMoastyToasty · 05/06/2025 15:08

Before my BIL met my DSIS he lived in a house he had purchased with his best mate. Would this be an option?

BeingaDaughter · 05/06/2025 15:11

How about sharing when you get older?

Does anyone find that you never stop worrying about your kids and then you start worrying about your parents as they get older!

My Dad was really lonely once he was living on his own and so we set up a community group to help older people share together, giving some company and peace of mind and sharing the bills.

It's gone really well and the One Show did a film about it recently. We do all the safeguarding, arranging and ongoing support.

I just wondered what you guys thought? It seems such a practical idea, as long as it's supported, but wondered if other people feel the same about wondering how to help their Mum or Dad once alone?

uncomfortablydumb60 · 05/06/2025 15:17

It's a lovely idea. I would consider doing the same.

MyKingdomForACat · 05/06/2025 15:21

Sounds a great idea. Share of the costs etc. It’s expensive to try to do it all on your own even on £50k. My youngest son earns similar and I think it’d be worth looking into him buying with a friend x

Datsafunnyone · 05/06/2025 15:26

It's just a houseshare really. Flatmates 👍

Just have certain things agreed on first. Like what happens if one person wants to move out - how would that work in terms of rent and what would the other one be expected to do.

Also I'd be wary of her boyfriend basically moving in when/if he eventually realises that a bit of privacy is nice.

IdLikeABackMassage · 05/06/2025 15:39

BeingaDaughter · 05/06/2025 15:11

How about sharing when you get older?

Does anyone find that you never stop worrying about your kids and then you start worrying about your parents as they get older!

My Dad was really lonely once he was living on his own and so we set up a community group to help older people share together, giving some company and peace of mind and sharing the bills.

It's gone really well and the One Show did a film about it recently. We do all the safeguarding, arranging and ongoing support.

I just wondered what you guys thought? It seems such a practical idea, as long as it's supported, but wondered if other people feel the same about wondering how to help their Mum or Dad once alone?

Absolutely brilliant idea (with caveats eg if everyone gets along, practical issues etc)

I see this being the future of old age. It would reduce loneliness, costs, and worry among the children of elderly parents.

DaisyChain505 · 05/06/2025 15:50

Sounds like a great idea.

You can split the bills and have the opportunity to save up extra money for buying or whatever you wish to do with it.

I think you should have a proper conversation beforehand about ground rules and that maybe you should put a 6 months timer on it and review it then incase it isn’t working for either of you and to remember that if it isn’t it’s not necessarily a reflection on your friendship it just means you’d prefer not to live together.

WhiteRose9791 · 05/06/2025 15:56

My friend and I bought our first house together at 24! Got us on the ladder.

purpleygrey · 05/06/2025 15:59

Why would it be weird ? Lots of people house/flat share. Better that it’s someone you already know

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 05/06/2025 16:00

Just ask her ' wacky idea- feel free to say no and I won't be offended but what if...'

MeandT · 06/06/2025 18:42

Why wouldn't you? I've only been able to afford to live independently for 6 months out of nearly 5 decades now!

Have a chat about your expectations & groundrules (compatible cleanliness levels is more important than most other things!) - stuff like how many nights a week other halfs might stay over, whether you cook together or keep completely separate food stuff, how you divide up who picks what to watch in the main living space, what temperature vs bill you're prepared to live with for heating etc ;)