What is standard procedure when you are inside your house and you make eye contact with a neighbour who is in their house?

[thecatislying]

Our houses are built pretty close together.
It has never been a problem before, but the house to the left has recently started using a bedroom that has a window directly facing our massive kitchen window.

I do concede that it's not wholly unreasonable of them to decide to make use of a room in their house, but at the same time, I keep making eye contact with them while I'm in my kitchen.

This morning I was standing alone at my sink trying to fit a large spatula in my mouth to scrape off the golden cheesy bits that had stuck when Mrs Next Door, in dressing gown and hair net, flung open the curtains. We locked eyes and I don't think either of us particularly enjoyed the encounter.

So far I have been pretending that it's not happening and I haven't noticed. It's not a wildly convincing strategy, but it's all I can think of. Dh suggests giving them a cheery wave. Mortifying.

Diagram, because I know you'll want one. I've included the lovely view because it's the reason I'm not rushing to stick up frosted plastic. Blue box is my kitchen window. Red box is their bedroom window.

10/10 for the diagram!

It does sound a tad awkward...If I were your neighbour I'd get some nets for the bedroom as it doesn't sound like there's much of a view.

I wouldn't acknowledge them when you see them through the window but act like normal when you bump into them outside.

Stick the stuff on your glass that means you can see out but she only sees her own reflection.
You get to keep your countryside view, and she stops looking.

How far apart are your windows?
Could you put a tall plant in between?

‘Trying to fit a large spatula in my mouth’ had me in fits! Definitely something you need privacy for.

I think that stuff only works during daylight - at night with a light on in your room the other house would be able to see right in.

I think perhaps it used to be a storage room or maybe a guest bedroom, but now someone has moved into it.

Yes - a tall plant might help. In fact there are some shrubs that we could let grow higher - although I don't suppose they want to lose more light.

If I were them I'd put a net curtain. Quite hard to curtain our window - it's a sort of alcove window with a deep shelf above the kitchen sink. Also, I assume this is worse for them than us - we're in our kitchen, while they're in their bedroom.

Obviously you do the two fingers to the eyes 'I have eyes on you' gesture, bend down under the sill and return with a hefty nerf gun and mouth "run".

😂Of course!! I'll try that.

The first thing that I would do is get a smaller spatula.

10 out of 10 for the diagram , is the lovely view a river or are you just using poetic license ?

I love @Snakeandladder 's idea 😁.

Grab a pot towel and cover you face then play peek a boo with them and see if they join in .

Disaper slowly by pretending to walk down a set of stsirs

( sort of joking but it may work ) Attach a retractable awning above your window ( outside of course 🙃 ) so that it blocks the view from the higher window but not the lovely view.

But my ultimate tip . . . . . . . . . .
Get a smaller spatula 😁

Great minds think alike !

I don't know what to suggest, but I feel your pain because I have to go out when the window cleaner comes.

I'd wave.

About a year ago we got a massive tree cut down at the front of our house. That tree had been between the windows in the lounge and the road so blocked the view. Once it was cut down I could see everything on the road and in the gardens across the road clearly but did not make the connection that the reverse was also true, until my neighbour standing in her garden waved at me while I was sat at my laptop in the lounge. So now I always wave when I make eye contact.

Yeah I would go for cheery wave every time. Either they will wave back and a lovely friendship will emerge or they will do something their side to ensure they aren't caught in any compromising situations in your view. Now you know you can be prepared to lick your spatula out of sight.

Top quality diagram there and I very much enjoyed the spatula details

https://www.purlfrost.com/privacy-window-film/

My dog once ran into the garden of a house which had a lovely huge French window behind which a family were having their breakfast, reading the Sunday papers.

The dog's mission was to eat the copious amounts of leftovers they had put out for the birds (rats?). He was a bulimic dog, obsessed with food, so my only option was to go in and chase him down.

The entire family were as one in adopting the strategy of pretending I wasn't there (little glimpses at me and the dog, then eyes down on the newspaper again. They were being kind, but it might have been less embarrassing if they had knocked on the window and ranted at me. Which of course they were perfectly entitled to do. (I know, I KNOW, how much I was in the wrong.)

So I would suggest that the protocol should involve some brief visual gesture of mutual awkwardness. Perhaps hold up a small sign saying "Hell is other people. J.P. Sartre." After that, you can go back to pretending you can't see each other.

Love the diagram btw.

Give her a wink and a thumbs up. You don’t even have to remove the spatula.

Maintain the peep!

Or a bigger mouth.

Okay, so friendly wave, spatula in situ, from this point onwards. Will be a bit weird as I've completely blanked them up to this point (not in the driveway, obvs. I wave and say hello outside the house, like a normal person. Just not so far when I'm in my kitchen, having a moment with some crispy melty cheese on a spatula.)

The Satre sign is a winner, @PlasticAcrobat

All you can do is the very British thing of pretending you haven’t seen each other.

Just wave the spatula and smile.

Alternatively you could perhaps fit horizontal blinds & keep them partially opened (pulled up or angled)appropriate to time of day & level of risk of accidental exhibitionism from either household.

A quick smile and nod. Then straight to the shops to buy a curtain/blind/ window film so it never happens again.