Neighbour baby noise complaint.

[Ddflat56]

Dd has a 2.5 year old . He's pretty small more like a 18 month old. He is non verbal. Very rarely responds to anything. Doesn't understand anything at all . He's in his own little world. He walks around the flat all the time.

She lives in a new build on the 2nd floor her neighbour came up and complained about her son walking this was around 10.30 am . Dd explained his special needs and its near impossible to stop him walking. He doesn't bang but you can hear his foot steps.The neighbour said she's been on a 12hr hour shift she shattered. Dd said she doesn't know what to say.

About an hour later the neighbour came up again this time quite aggressive screaming and shouting at dd telling her to shut her kid up. But at that point GS was laying on the bed . He wasn't even on the floor. She was saying things like you need to control your kid. I have a 3 year old and I can. She said she hears it every day from 8am till 1am . Which is not true they are asleep way before that . At least 4 times a week dd is out of the flat from 8.15am till 3.15pm.

Flooring wise dd has vinyl flooring put down by the council. no wood or laminate. All flats have the same flooring.

I did that once to a neighbour about loud music when we lived in a dense housing estate. Apologised of course when I realised the mistake!

I did wounder this there's been a few times i have told my kids to stop with the noise abd it turned out it was my neighbour. Not sure if that the case for dd . I mean neighbour said about walking around and GS does walk round the flat almost constantly.

If he is literally constantly walking around and she knows that then I would expect her to do whatever she can to minimise that noise, carpets, rugs, slippers etc.

Yes this is why I mentioned it. He won't understand that he needs to sit for a bit. Or walk quietly. He can't really control how he steps . I mean he's not thudding though

She gourd get soundproofing flooring mats and then carpet on top of that. The council won't do anything about children's noise. If the neighbour is banging, screaming and shouting maybe you daughter needs to call the non emergency police number. Its intimidating and harassment.

She can't afford that at the moment. I will help dd look for soft slippers . Its worth a try.

If she comes back screaming and banging on the door, your daughter needs to call the police.

Maybe Croc type shoes? They are very comfy and sound deadening.

Have a look if there are any grants available.

https://grants-search.turn2us.org.uk/

https://www.wellchild.org.uk/get-support/information-hub/grants-for-families/

https://www.familyfund.org.uk/

https://family-action.org.uk/grant-programmes/

I don't think he would be able to keep them on .

I will take a look /pass to dd .

I don’t have kids but I just find it very sad especially knowing the neighbour has her own toddler that she’d rather get angry at OPs DD rather than try to understand what’s happening and maybe work with her to try and find a solution.

This is mainly down to shockingly poor building standards and irresponsible interior furnishing. The government ought to consider improving standards in this regard. It would cut down the cost on public finances of dealing with noise complaints and improve quality of life for a huge number of people. The screaming at your DD is not acceptable, but lack of sleep is torturous.

Above the ground floor, flats should be required to have carpeting with good underlay. Walking, even careful walking with bare feet let alone the sort of lack of control a toddler learning to walk has or the normal thud of pretty much anyone in shoes, can boom in the flat below if the flooring is badly done.

We also generally have walls and doors that are too thin/lack mass and a lack of absorptive materials and vibration isolation techniques when building/refurbishing flats.

OP, while a lot of the more advance techniques need to be folded into the actual building or refurbishing, there's a lot your DD could do to lower the impact on her neighbour in terms of decent carpeting and soft footware. The neighbour could also consider acoustic ceiling tiles, they won't do much for footsteps which effectively turn the ceiling into a drum, but they should help with noises like shouting.

Being on probation is all the more reason for DD to get her complaint in first so please point that out to her. Tell her to make sure she mentions that the neighbour is complaining about noise at times when she and her DC are asleep or out of the flat so they realise immediately that neighbour isn't rational/reasonable, and definitely mention the aggressive behaviour.

You say he is out 4 days a week - what happens the other 3 days? At that age we would go out for a few hours every morning, come back for nap & then head out again in the afternoon. Regardless of SEN I do think that toddlers need lots of activity to wear them out. It sounds like he never actually stops moving around. That would annoy me too & I would hope that they might head out at some point. Are you saying he’s not going anywhere on those 3 days & is just in the flat? I can’t see soft slippers making much difference.

Noise from babies/ children is to be expected.

At the same time, I can completely understand it's not exactly pleasant to constantly hear children above you and it sounds like your grandson is particularly active.

No one's really being unreasonable, but carpet/ rugs would be a good compromise. Vinyl floors are a stupid choice.

If I was knowingly disturbing my neighbour and there was a solution as simple as putting down some rugs or carpets, I'd do it.

Take a look at local kindness and community groups for free carpet offcuts and rugs, like ppl says can he go out every day, does he go to any groups or activities

If lifting the vinyl is an option, you can lay soundproof boards or underlay underneath it. Alternatively you could lay in on top and cover with another layer of vinyl.
If rugs are too expensive, then look for carpet off cuts or ask for them on Freecycle. Then you can add some fabric tape around the edges and create your own rugs. That's probably the cheapest option. We have freecycled many a largish piece of brand new carpet off cuts.

I agree with this. It must be very hard on DD but it would drive me nuts to listen to this all day.

I feel for the neighbour. It can be really psychologically taxing having the noise constantly and as your DD has to live with it she probably doesn’t realise just how constant and loud it is.

I would look into getting her carpet fitted with a good underlay.

are you sure the vinyl flooring isn’t already the noise reducing sort? It would be very poor of the council/HA to fit normal vinyl in first floor properties.

Generally speaking it is written into the lease that first floor flats and above only have carpet for this reason. Certainly in privately owned flats.

I would be asking the management company/leaseholder/HA for their thoughts.

She gos out them 3 days . I'm just not sure of her pattern or for how long etc there may be days she stays in. She can't be out everyday. Sometimes she needs them in days . Ie a house work day . Maybe an i just don't want to go out today. Maybe a bad weather day. She shouldn't have to be out all the time.

I did find out that the ground floor people had complained about the child on the first floor . The same one that was shouting at dd. So its definitely a building problem.

Dd neighbour is complaining again. This time it was 11am bsbging in her door for over 20 mins dd ignored it . But called the police. They have made a report but don't come out.

Really need safer neighbour hood or someone to come out and explain the complaints procedure to the neighbour.
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