Mum's Ring - what to do with it?

[GinJeanie]

Hiya. I'm looking for ideas on what you'd do in this situation. My Mum died quite a while back and left me her engagement ring, amongst other things.
We had a difficult relationship and she was quite emotionally abusive when we were younger. I don't know what to do with this ring. To be honest, I don't really want this sort of keepsake - particularly as her marriage to my Dad wasn't particularly happy. Also, it was cut off her finger when she went into ICU before she died- which just reminds me of a sad, traumatic time. I don't want to keep it but I'd feel guilty getting rid of it. Is that ridiculous? My brothers don't want it for similar reasons. I know it's daft I wouldn't pass it onto my DCs as it almost feels cursed (overdramatic, I know). Shall I just hide it in the loft and forget about it?

Sell it and buy yourself something you like

how about having it remade into something else entirely- a pendant/esrrings/part of a bracelet or a charm? Alternatively sell it, it likely won’t be worth much, but a few quid in your pocket and getting rid of it is better than always wondering what to do with it. A jobbing jewellery maker will take it.

Eithet have it refashioned in to something you’d like or sell it. Gold is at an all time high atm. Buy something for yourself with the proceeds

Sell it or have it made into something you like.

Sell it, or as it seems to be causing you so much upset I would either throw it away or simply dig a hole and put it in it, if you no sentimental attachment to it then feel absolutely no guilt for letting go of it. It is hard but you might feel lighter if you just let go of it.

Have the stone removed. Sell the gold. Save the stone, and eventually have it made into something or give it to an adult child.

Thank you. I guess I could sell it, given that I don't want it in the house - I'd just feel really awful doing so. It's a weird kind of magical thinking. Like my dead Mother will know or something...😕

Or you could sell it and donate the proceeds to a charity.. maybe one relevant to your mums cause of death?

Just sell it, it doesn't mean anything to you, it's absolutely fine for them not to mean anything to you.

@mumonthehill - you're spot on! I need to get rid somehow...

She won’t know. You don’t have to be chained up by it. Sell it. Take the money and buy a ring you can wear with joy

@nahthatsnotforme - I was thinking about this! Not sure it'd worth very much but it's a good shout. Thanks!

Is there a charity which was close to her heart? I think that if I felt uncomfortable keeping it and uncomfortable selling it, charity would make me feel like it was carrying on doing some good in the world…

Sell it and do something good with the money. Either something nice for yourself or your family, or if you prefer for a charity or 3rd party.

I agree with pp sell it , even if its only worth a few quid .
You could buy yourself something but I'd say don't buy something that you'd 'keep' like more jewellery something for the house as it ( in my eyes ) would still be your mum's and given you didn't have a good relationship I'd not want that as a reminder.
Perhaps spend it on a day out or put it into a savings account for your DCs

Yeah I wouldn't buy anything in it's place either just use the money.

I like the idea of giving the sale money to a charity that your mum supported or one you do.

Absolutely do not feel guilty about getting rid of it. Esp as none of the rest of the family want it.

Thanks all. Really helpful... Not sure why I have such a mental block about it. Emotional baggage!! 🙄

A ring that has been cut that means nothing to you? I would have just binned it tbh.

Give it to one of your brothers to dispose of.

agree with pp, sell it, but if you’re going to give the money to charity anyway, just save yourself the hassle and give them the ring!

I've just had my mum's white gold wedding ring ( horrible 60 year marriage, he was abusive) made into a ring for me.

I see it as getting something good out of something bad. The ring would have been £1500 to buy new, it cost £280 to re model it.

My mum wasn’t sentimental about jewellery at all. So when she died I knew it would be fine to have some things remodelled. I had her wedding ring made into two little pendant drops - one for me and one for DD. Dad’s wedding ring was made into a little pendant disc. I wear them almost every day. Depends on the stone you have OP - but I’d perhaps have a pendant made from it

I'm not sentimental about jewellery either I've said to my Dh and dds to do what they want with it, I'm it's just "things " person.

Sell it. It holds no positive memories for anyone that actually knew her. Do something positive with the money that you can turn into a good memory of her.