I'm awake because I cut ties with my best friend. We lived in eachothers pockets from age 17. We have texted every single day. Weve toured the world, slept on floors and sofa beds. Supported eachother through hard times.
I'm 40 now. I had twins four years ago and made him their uncle of course. Since day 1. They love him so much. He was going through quite lonely times so I went out to freezing benches during lockdown to keep him company, while my babies were slept at home. I met him in parks, i brought picnics. I bought dinner, sang karaoke, and gave him nephews, cooked him SO MANY meals, got the beers in, took him on nights out, on 2hrs sleep, with thd kids at home sleeping sound with their dad, because he missed hanging out. And he said he was so lonely. Even though he has a lovely gorgeous girlfriend. He values friendship a lot.
I know he loves me. But he has never been reciprocative. He doesn't invite me out. We would usually joke about this and he lets me tease him a LOT. I have spent 23 years with my friend.
But he had a child last year. She is so so beautiful. I was over the moon. He has let me visit once. He's turned down every invitation I've made and only wants to send me instagram reels.
I loved my best friend so much that over the years, I never really worried about getting any others. I have a lovely husband and sister. And he was my FRIEND. What more can a girl need?
Today he told me he's actuallly moved out of our city. Some small village. Hours away. No prior warning.
It hurt so much. It felt like the final straw. When I considered leaving our city last year for a bigger family home he guilt tripped me SO HARD to stay. And i did stay. I just moved a few miles up the road.
Well, this all felt like the end for me I guess. I explained everything and cut contact.
I know ita a a me thing. I didnt blame him really for being a bit crap. But I'm awake feeling sad. And wondering how to make friends. Anyway thanks for letting me get that out.
Sorry that was so long and boring phew maybe I helped you get to sleep!
I hope you are alright OP and being well looked after
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