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Original poster

Any females living / lived with male roommates?

50 replies

sunshineandstarsgirl · 06/05/2025 21:08

How is/was your experience? Is it safe? I saw a job in a village. Travelling to and fro is not a long-term option. There aren't that many houses in the village in Spareroom website. There is a town next to the village where I could live. But, the houses in the town I looked at in Spareroom have atleast 1 male living in it. There are only about 6 houses in Spareroom website in this town.
So, my question is as a female to live with men who are strangers- is it safe?
The job I am looking at is an entry level HR role which is hard to come by. Hence, asking here for you lovely people's opinions/advice/experiences.

OP posts:
HowManyMintCLubsIsTooMany · 06/05/2025 21:10

Some of my best flatshares have been with men. Does that mean all men are safe? No.

it is impossible to answer this question

Stickortwigs · 06/05/2025 21:10

I lived with six men as the only woman and felt very safe. Especially when I was sure a man on the bus was following me and after I sent a message all six were waiting to meet me at the bus stop.

Whatsgoingonherethenagain · 06/05/2025 21:11

roommate? As in sharing a room? No. I wouldn’t.

housemate or flatmate? Have done and would do.

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Original poster
sunshineandstarsgirl · 06/05/2025 21:12

Stickortwigs · 06/05/2025 21:10

I lived with six men as the only woman and felt very safe. Especially when I was sure a man on the bus was following me and after I sent a message all six were waiting to meet me at the bus stop.

Aww... That's sweet... 😊

OP posts:
Original poster
sunshineandstarsgirl · 06/05/2025 21:12

Whatsgoingonherethenagain · 06/05/2025 21:11

roommate? As in sharing a room? No. I wouldn’t.

housemate or flatmate? Have done and would do.

Sorry I meant housemate.

OP posts:
Throwingitallaway24 · 06/05/2025 21:14

I lived in a house share with two men and a woman in my early 20s. One of the men kept trying it on with me and the other used my razor to shave his pubes. I do think generally though there’s no problems with house shares of mixed sexes.

SkaneTos · 06/05/2025 21:15

I lived in a mixed "dormitory" as a university student. We all had our own rooms and bathrooms, we shared a kitchen and a living room. It was fine! It was fun.

When I was around 25 I shared a flat with a man. It was not a good situation, not because of him being a man, but because he was very very stingy.

user101101 · 06/05/2025 21:22

I did and luckily nothing bad happened but now i look back at it i think i was very innocent and naive. But then we all were, including the guys!

VirgosNeedGoals · 06/05/2025 21:23

Stickortwigs · 06/05/2025 21:10

I lived with six men as the only woman and felt very safe. Especially when I was sure a man on the bus was following me and after I sent a message all six were waiting to meet me at the bus stop.

Love this! Men can be so awesome 👌

WhereAreMyKids · 06/05/2025 21:27

Lived with 3 males in a house share during my 20s. One was an alcoholic asshole, one kept to himself and the last ended up as my husband 😅

Our only common area was the kitchen and bathroom, so there wasn't much cross over. We had a schedule for cleaning shared spaces, we all had different work schedules so we didn't get in each others way too much.

FinallyHere · 06/05/2025 21:29

ad I student I live in single sec and mixed sex ‘houses’ with individual bedrooms and shared bathrooms and kitchens.

the women’s single sex houses were plagued by flashers, lurkers and drunks trying to break in. The mixed sex, nothing.

I shared a private house with three men, only one of whom I knew from college. After I cleared a few years with of empty toothpaste tubes from the bathroom cabinet, we had no problems. Didn’t socialise much or even at all with each other.

Original poster
sunshineandstarsgirl · 06/05/2025 21:38

I went to a girls only school till I was 16. So, maybe the fear could be coming from not mingling much with men. I would prefer if I could live in a women-only household. The job is in Ripponden which is in West Yorkshire. Any other towns close to Ripponden (apart from Sowerby Bridge)?? Thank you everyone. 🩷 Much love to everyone who answered.

OP posts:
RedToothBrush · 06/05/2025 21:39

Lived with one girl and five blokes for a year. The blokes were awesome. Much less hard work than the girls I've lived with in the past.

Mum2jenny · 06/05/2025 21:43

Have lived with mixed and once with a single female. Give me mixed every time. She was very tight and wouldn’t share the buying of basic stuff like loo roll, but used what I bought all the time.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 06/05/2025 21:44

I’ve shared flats with lots of men (and women), sometimes just me and 3 guys.

Anyway of course it will almost certainly be perfectly safe. I would just go and see the flats and see what you think of them - if you think they are fine, chances are they will be - put a lock on your door for belt and braces. If you don’t like it, you can move.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 06/05/2025 21:45

No one can guarantee safety anywhere. But I had a few male flatmates over the years and always got on fine. My sister was the only woman with 3 male flatmates for years and wouldn't have it any other way. My Ds when he was my BF lived with a girl and I was always around there. Some people thought it odd but if never bothered me.

JoyousEagle · 06/05/2025 22:05

I moved in to a mixed sex house share of 7 people. There were a couple of other women when I moved in but over a couple of months they moved out (not for any bad reason) and were replaced by men so I was the only woman. It was fine. I think it was partly fine because there were so many of them - I mean, I wouldn’t have wanted to live with just one man. Also two of them were a couple. Luckily they were all lovely (but that was luck, they could have been horrible).
Personally I felt safe, like the PP who mentioned texting her male housemates and they all came to meet her. I had a situation where a date walked me home and wouldn’t take no for an answer at the door. One yell from me had 6 guys in the hallway. Although I’ve also lived in a house share with 3 women who’d have done the same thing.

But obviously any house share has risks. And realistically those risks are probably higher with men. I’d want a lock on my door whatever the housemate situation was.

RedToothBrush · 06/05/2025 22:13

Ftw the house share I had with six girls was the one which was scary when we had to throw out the boyfriend of one of the girls because he beat the shit out of her...

MsDDxx · 07/05/2025 00:29

Stickortwigs · 06/05/2025 21:10

I lived with six men as the only woman and felt very safe. Especially when I was sure a man on the bus was following me and after I sent a message all six were waiting to meet me at the bus stop.

I love this!

Of course not every man is safe, but not all women are safe either.

Mmhmmn · 07/05/2025 00:34

No one can possibly say if it is safe to flat share with a male who you don’t know. it entirely depends on that individual.
Lots of people (myself included) have had totally normal experiences. But others have ended up with sub normals…

Thisshirtisonfire · 07/05/2025 00:35

I've lived in plenty of shared houses with men who i didn't previously know.
Never had one single issue!!
Never even occurred to me to think of this as a possible problem.
As long as you have a private room with a door that has a lock and you've a phone to call 999 why would this be more unsafe than any other scenario in life where there would be men?
I've certainly faced violence and sexual assault from men in my life but none of that was due to house sharing

Trallers · 07/05/2025 00:39

It wouldn't put me off unless I met them and felt creeped out. Plus, living with women doesn't mean they don't have weird boyfriends hanging around! I would want to be able to lock my room, but that would go for any houseshare.

PoopingAllTheWay · 07/05/2025 00:43

Impossible to answer

The problem isn't ‘men’
It can be a ‘man’ that is unsafe
Who that man is we do not know

Missey85 · 07/05/2025 03:14

I shared with a male it was fine 😊 it didn't bother me his my friends partner and he paid me rent money were still friends now 🙂

JustSoFrustrated · 07/05/2025 03:22

I’ve done it, and nothing bad came of it… though something definitely could have. It’s a gamble every time you room with strangers, especially strangers that are physically larger and stronger than you.