What have you cooked recently which didn’t turn out very well?

[RainySummer01]

I made a leek and potato pie following a BBC good food recipe and it was rubbish. Too much pastry, not enough filling, dc said it smelt the house out and it just didn’t taste particularly nice. I won’t make it again!

@Darkclothes i never feel confident using cornflour in stirfries, it never turns out the way I want it to.

I made a ‘creamy Tuscan beef’ dish that called for several tablespoons of paprika. I didn’t realise until I’d finished cooking that I’d used hot paprika by mistake. It was inedible 😫😫😫 I put the whole lot into a bag and into the food waste bin and the next morning the entire bag had disappeared. I hope the foxes like their food spicy 😂

This weekend - meringue. They bled despite me doing what I think was everything right. But made a lovely Eton Mess instead so all good

@Darkclothes I have a wonderful book called Authentic Chinese Cuisine by Bryanna Grogan which taught me to do the whole cornflour sauce thing. Highly recommend it (even though its vegan and I am not).

I have three Anna Jones Cookbooks and I can't make anything edible from any of them despite, most of the time, being a very competent cook. Other people rave about her (including Jennifer Aldridge, may she rest in peace!) but I am just missing something.

A Tom Parker Bowles Thai inspired noodles recipe from Saturday kitchen last week. He eats it multiple times a week apparently…. Super healthy. Absolutely rank! One mouthful and it went in the bin! I was absolutely gutted as I’d been really excited about it all day after watching him.

Best mate once made Chicken Satay, following a recipe.
She didn’t know about peanut butter, and used Panda…

I tried to make plum chutney once…it was vile, nothing could save it and eventually the pan was put outside the smell was so bad!!! Don’t think I’ve risked chutney since!!

So much. So, so much. I don't know if I'm losing it or my oven is fecked, but everything is either half cooked, burnt, or just tasteless. The last thing I messed up was a lemon flap jack. Actually tasted delicious but I nearly lost my teeth eating it. And the other day I was making crumpets (gluten free) & they were a total disaster. So, as that was on the hob not the oven, the problem is probably me 😂

Chutney can fuck off. As it’s traditionally made in autumn with gluts of tomatoes, plums etc.. add vinegar and sugar and what you get is a massive wasp attracting miasma, because you have to keep the windows open because it smells so bad. No. Buying it in jars forever.

An apple crumble but the crumble was soggy. It’s a new oven, I’m not sure if I need to cook it higher or the oven is not venting properly

I made meatloaf. I followed the recipe to the letter (BBC). Ghastly and was awake all night with indigestion.

Well, I just batch cooked a lovely tofu curry....unfortunately I got really sick with nausea and vertigo the next day. Now my brain has linked the 2 things together and it makes me feel sick just looking at it!🙄

Oh, and I also can't make a sauce unless it has lumps in it.

I'm proud of you!

Mum made a cake once that went completely wrong and the whole bottom half was crunchy and the top just lovely.

We used to ask for Wrong Cake but it couldn't be repeated.

One of those chicken with orzo dishes floating around FB. I think they were touting it as a Mary Berry recipe but I’m not so sure. Turned out like a poorly cooked soup, the sauce ratio was so wrong.

Made a tarka dhal from a recipe a few months ago which turned out to be The Best Comfort Food ever.

Since then there’s been something ‘off’ every single time I’ve made it, from the overall texture to the lentils refusing to cook and staying mealy, to the flavours of the tarka being actually unpleasant.

Gutted because I thought I’d found the perfect healthy but tasty cook-ahead dinner.

I can’t bake I just can’t seem to resist adding a bit more or less of something and as I don’t really know how to bake my chocolate cakes have been more like chocolate brownies

lasagna I never can get it right. I have made it a number of times once ds cried as he was so looking forward to it and the pasta sheets were still hard. Now he laughs at the memories of poor excuses of lasagna that I have made

Millionaire Shortbread. Top and bottom were nice, middles was gross, sloppy and yuk

It's special when your children cry at your cooking isn't it.

recently tried to make a traditional japanese home style stew and i think i put way too much water in it, it barely had flavour and was...well...watery. still sort of edible but that was disappointing as it took hours to make.

not recent, but when i was younger my friend and i tried to make lemon drizzle cake but we used granulated brown sugar instead of icing sugar in the glaze. the sugar didnt dissolve and when we put it on the cake the lemon juice sank into it while the sugar stayed on top, making the whole thing taste horribly sour.

also a while back, i made a savoury pancake with spring onions. only the spring onions didnt actually cook, so when i bit into it got a massive mouthful of raw spring onion and a pancake that was basically flavourless. it went in the bin immediately.

i'm normally an alright cook -- honest!

A salad I saw with crispy rice. I’m not sure what crispy rice should be like but mine was like uncooked rice, just hard and got stuck in my teeth. Very disappointing.

@Happyinarcon I am making an apple crumble tomorrow and dc has just reminded me of the last one I made which was all clumpy and dry. I also have a new oven!

Trying to be healthy so I tried some Joe Wicks and Pinch of Nom recipes. They were all tasteless and watery. I cook from scratch things like pizza, bread, cakes etc but no luck with those two cookbooks.

Any and every oat recipe I try tastes like hell! Grainy and repulsive! Overnight oats, baked oats all minging!

Millionaire shortbread. Seems so simple reading the recipe but it was a gloopy mess that fell apart

I found a Spanish recipe in a magazine once which had a lot of my favourite ingredients in - chicken, rice, black beans, smoked paprika, chorizo in a tomatoey sauce. I was so excited, I made basically a large vat of the stuff. It was awful! So tasteless and the black beans were like hard rabbit droppings. I stubbornly froze it all convinced I would eventually eat it but it went into the bin 6 months later.