She wasted her life being a mother? Give yourself a shake for goodness sake. Parenting has moved on and not all wisdom and experience is welcome. No wonder you find it difficult to have a conversation with your DIL if you voice the opinions you have on here.
Personally, I’m always amazed at new guidance and things like self sterilising bottles, mothers are actually allowed (and protected by law) to be able to breastfeed their children in public, children are no longer expected to be seen and not heard etc.
My own mother was a pain in the arse with her out of date “advice” and her mocking of up to date guidance. Thank goodness I never gave my children rose hip syrup in bottles, weaned them on baby rice at 12 weeks old, drank Guinness to “build myself up” in pregnancy nor left my children to “cry it out” because I was making “a rod for my own back”.
“Wisdom in experience” is keeping your mouth shut as a grandmother, being amazed at the lovely things available to parents that we never had, learning from new guidance and supporting the choices new parents make. They are the parents afterall!
I have 2 grandchildren and not once have I imparted my “wisdom”, because I’m so amazed at how times have changed for the better. It’s hard enough having a child and no new parent needs advice unless they ask for it.
My youngest grandchild is 3 weeks old, what I did do is provide 2 weeks meals (handing them in at the door every few days) order 2 weeks shopping to be delivered and offer to walk the dog. Why did I do this? Because I remember how hard it was in those first few weeks.
Change your attitude, sit back and stop with the offering advice unless of course you want to alienate yourself from your family.
OP I’m glad you enjoyed Colin, don’t listen to people like @AmusedGoose on here. You can love your mother but it doesn’t stop them being annoying.