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Original poster

Pissed off. know i have no right though.

42 replies

Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 21:11

Kids go to their dad's every other weekend. He's a Disney dad . Does all the fun bits. Never ever says no to them. He's much more fun etc.

Money is a bit short. Plus a birthday coming up so was trying to do cheap /free stuff . I get 2 free cinema tickets from sky . So I thought me and 3 kids can go to the cinema and see minecraft seems to be the only one that's right for them. But nope he's booked it for 2 weeks time. So now I can't do that with them.

I know I'm being petty. It just pisses me off.

OP posts:
mdinbc · 09/04/2025 21:13

Aw, I feel for you. Just think of all the love the kids get on a daily basis, and know that one day they will appreciate it.

Motherearthisbusy · 09/04/2025 21:15

Thank your lucky stars he’s not a tight fisted prick that does nothing with them.

I know it’s irritating but honestly re frame it in your mind and it’ll make you feel better. Think of it as all those nice things he does for the kids will have a positive impact on them. No one wins when parents snipe at each other so just let it go and do something just as nice with your babies.

Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 21:20

Motherearthisbusy · 09/04/2025 21:15

Thank your lucky stars he’s not a tight fisted prick that does nothing with them.

I know it’s irritating but honestly re frame it in your mind and it’ll make you feel better. Think of it as all those nice things he does for the kids will have a positive impact on them. No one wins when parents snipe at each other so just let it go and do something just as nice with your babies.

I won't say anything to him. Or the kids . Its 100% fantastic that he does things with them . I guess I'm a bit jealous in a way because of the Disney dad stuff. And they are not at the age where they can see other stuff besides fun bits

OP posts:
Angrymum22 · 09/04/2025 21:21

If it’s any consolation my DH 20 went to see Minecraft yesterday and said it was crap. He still plays Minecraft with the mates he went to see it with, all three are big rugby players but closet minecrafters. So at least you don’t have to sit through it.

itsmeits · 09/04/2025 21:25

Okay flip it on the head have you got a mate you can go and see a film with?
Or is there something else the kids want to see?

TeenageRooster · 09/04/2025 21:30

I'd take them anyway and get in first. They may even want to go again - my teen really liked it. Plus, does he check out what you do with them and take the trouble to vary it?

Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 22:16

itsmeits · 09/04/2025 21:25

Okay flip it on the head have you got a mate you can go and see a film with?
Or is there something else the kids want to see?

I don't want to see it. But the kids do and it was my treat for them and for us to go together. Theres nothing else. The other is snow white they won't want to see that the other stuff is to old or to young

OP posts:
Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 22:19

TeenageRooster · 09/04/2025 21:30

I'd take them anyway and get in first. They may even want to go again - my teen really liked it. Plus, does he check out what you do with them and take the trouble to vary it?

It did go through my head to take them. But I feel like that would be a bit nasty when I know he's booked it.

OP posts:
BlondiePortz · 09/04/2025 22:26

Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 22:19

It did go through my head to take them. But I feel like that would be a bit nasty when I know he's booked it.

Show quote history

That is the mature decision not to, look at it all from the children's view point not yours, but personally a don't see the point of the 'Disney dad' label because when i person sees children less than the other parent they will do more fun stuff, would it be best if all the father did was make the kids clean toilets and only sit and watch TV? Then mums would complain the kids aren't doing anything

What do mothers expect fathers to do with the children that doesn't make them a 'Disney dad'

Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 22:41

BlondiePortz · 09/04/2025 22:26

That is the mature decision not to, look at it all from the children's view point not yours, but personally a don't see the point of the 'Disney dad' label because when i person sees children less than the other parent they will do more fun stuff, would it be best if all the father did was make the kids clean toilets and only sit and watch TV? Then mums would complain the kids aren't doing anything

What do mothers expect fathers to do with the children that doesn't make them a 'Disney dad'

Show quote history

I get what your saying but . Its hard when I'm seen as the boring one. He doesnt do any parenting at all. He doesn't do clothes washing, wash dinner plates /dishwasher. He's never ever cooked them a meal . He's never taken them to a gp. He doesn't have to do the school run. He's not involved with school stuff or ds sen/autism. He does haven't budget or be careful of anything at all. If i could skip all that and more I would be very happy. Just pisees me of that he's all the fun bits but no responsibility. I knlw I'm wrong to think that way but it's how I feel. I wont ever say that to the kids. Or let them know in any way .

OP posts:
pinotnow · 09/04/2025 23:06

For goodness sake, it didn't take long for the crap dad apologists to come along. Why does he only see them eow? And why is money tight for OP - I hope he is paying CM?

Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 23:30

pinotnow · 09/04/2025 23:06

For goodness sake, it didn't take long for the crap dad apologists to come along. Why does he only see them eow? And why is money tight for OP - I hope he is paying CM?

He does pay CM. Moneys not overly bad. It's just not that good at the moment next month I could be fine again. I knew it was was going to be good this month . But I at least knew I could take us to the cinema for around 20.00 that was our nice treat. I can pay all the bills food etc . And get ds his birthday bits . So its not the end of the world.

But their dad doesn't have to think about money or anything really. He can just jump in the car and have an expensive day out.

In reality I'm probably just feeling a bit jealous and ds is with him for his birthday so I wanted to do a couple of bits for ds before they go

I do accept its a me thing though.

OP posts:
Isthiswhatmenthink · 10/04/2025 07:22

But you’d booked it too? Can you explain the situation to him or is he a prick who won’t care or understand?

Isthiswhatmenthink · 10/04/2025 07:23

pinotnow · 09/04/2025 23:06

For goodness sake, it didn't take long for the crap dad apologists to come along. Why does he only see them eow? And why is money tight for OP - I hope he is paying CM?

That poster is always like that. Probably a bloke v

TwentyTwentyFive · 10/04/2025 07:26

I would take them. Why does he get priority because he's booked it for two weeks time? Presumably you're children are either on or about to be on their Easter holidays. That's two weeks to fill and I wouldn't be letting the tickets go to waste especially if the weather is going to be shit where you are like it is here next week. You've got tickets and it's an easy way to fill an afternoon.

justkeepswimingswiming · 10/04/2025 07:27

Angrymum22 · 09/04/2025 21:21

If it’s any consolation my DH 20 went to see Minecraft yesterday and said it was crap. He still plays Minecraft with the mates he went to see it with, all three are big rugby players but closet minecrafters. So at least you don’t have to sit through it.

Your husband does know it’s a kids film right? 😂 of course it’s not going to be good for adults!

SheilaFentiman · 10/04/2025 07:40

Could you talk to your ex? “I have these vouchers and would like to take them to Minecraft, is it possible for you to change your booking?”

I wonder if he actually HAS booked it yet (two weeks away is a long time in cinema terms)

Kilroyonly · 10/04/2025 07:46

TwentyTwentyFive · 10/04/2025 07:26

I would take them. Why does he get priority because he's booked it for two weeks time? Presumably you're children are either on or about to be on their Easter holidays. That's two weeks to fill and I wouldn't be letting the tickets go to waste especially if the weather is going to be shit where you are like it is here next week. You've got tickets and it's an easy way to fill an afternoon.

Do not take this advice, I’ve seen first hand how one parent undermining the other deliberately ends up hurting children. Communication with him is the only way if possible. I would just discuss it with him, he didn’t know you wanted to take them so it doesn’t sound spiteful. If he is reasonable then no doubt he will be fine for you to do it with them.

Winifredtabago · 10/04/2025 07:47

Happyhappy2025 · 09/04/2025 22:41

I get what your saying but . Its hard when I'm seen as the boring one. He doesnt do any parenting at all. He doesn't do clothes washing, wash dinner plates /dishwasher. He's never ever cooked them a meal . He's never taken them to a gp. He doesn't have to do the school run. He's not involved with school stuff or ds sen/autism. He does haven't budget or be careful of anything at all. If i could skip all that and more I would be very happy. Just pisees me of that he's all the fun bits but no responsibility. I knlw I'm wrong to think that way but it's how I feel. I wont ever say that to the kids. Or let them know in any way .

Show quote history

Forget about whether or not he is a so called Disney dad- why on earth has he never cooked them a meal? That's concerning if he has them every other weekend. What are they eating the weekends they stay with him.

TwentyTwentyFive · 10/04/2025 07:50

Kilroyonly · 10/04/2025 07:46

Do not take this advice, I’ve seen first hand how one parent undermining the other deliberately ends up hurting children. Communication with him is the only way if possible. I would just discuss it with him, he didn’t know you wanted to take them so it doesn’t sound spiteful. If he is reasonable then no doubt he will be fine for you to do it with them.

Show quote history

He doesn't sound reasonable though so why should the OP be the one to miss out on fun things? She's not undermining him by using tickets she already has. Plus he has two weeks to organise something else and is likely not doing any extra parenting during the Easter holidays so if a trip to the cinema is something the OP wanted to do she should be entitled to do so.

AuntieBsBramble · 10/04/2025 07:52

Can you tell him. Just an 'oh no.. I've booked this for Easter hols with my free tickets. You might want to look for something else for them'

It's not undermining, it's just a genuine clash. You both want to do something nice for kids and I bet they'd rather go sooner than later. Hype will be over in 2 weeks.

Disclaimer - I'm not separated so no idea how tricky these relationships are to manage.

Kilroyonly · 10/04/2025 08:04

TwentyTwentyFive · 10/04/2025 07:50

He doesn't sound reasonable though so why should the OP be the one to miss out on fun things? She's not undermining him by using tickets she already has. Plus he has two weeks to organise something else and is likely not doing any extra parenting during the Easter holidays so if a trip to the cinema is something the OP wanted to do she should be entitled to do so.

Show quote history

How is he not sounding reasonable, booking cinema tickets for your kids is not unreasonable if he had no prior knowledge that she wanted to take them. OP doesn’t suggest in her post that he is deliberately difficult or unreasonable just that she finds it frustrating that he does all the fun stuff

Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 10/04/2025 09:55

SheilaFentiman · 10/04/2025 07:40

Could you talk to your ex? “I have these vouchers and would like to take them to Minecraft, is it possible for you to change your booking?”

I wonder if he actually HAS booked it yet (two weeks away is a long time in cinema terms)

I said it seemed along time when he said it. Then he said about his daughter working at the cinema so she sorted it.

N9 can't really say anything.

OP posts:
Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 10/04/2025 10:00

Winifredtabago · 10/04/2025 07:47

Forget about whether or not he is a so called Disney dad- why on earth has he never cooked them a meal? That's concerning if he has them every other weekend. What are they eating the weekends they stay with him.

Show quote history

His mum does everything or they est out. They seem to have mcdonalds every other weekend as well . But I dont think that's the end of the world.

OP posts:
Original poster
Happyhappy2025 · 10/04/2025 10:09

TwentyTwentyFive · 10/04/2025 07:50

He doesn't sound reasonable though so why should the OP be the one to miss out on fun things? She's not undermining him by using tickets she already has. Plus he has two weeks to organise something else and is likely not doing any extra parenting during the Easter holidays so if a trip to the cinema is something the OP wanted to do she should be entitled to do so.

Show quote history

I do feel a bit like that . But I also don't want to cause bad feeling

OP posts: