Which inanimate object....

[TyrannasaurusJex]

....makes you scream with frustration?

Computer is the obvious answer but for me it's the MOTHERFUCKUNG HOOVER.
It seems to deliberately get stuck on corners, fall over it's own wire and then smirk at me with its STUPID FACE (guess you can tell the make!).
I know it's irrational but maybe it's a cathartic outlet??
So tell me - what inanimate object would you like to punch, metaphorically?

Oh, so many!

Packets that say "open here" that just tear across the way, so they can't be resealed

Loo roll holders in public loos, that are packed so tight that they only move a tiny amount when you pull at the tissue, meaning it rips and you only get a piece the size of a postage stamp

Jars of sauce that don't open unless you prize open the seal with a knife

The new coleslaw and dips at Tesco that don't have a lid, just a tear off top, so you have to decant contents into tupperware

Self check in pods at airports - make me panic!

Helplines that are operated by bots, who send you round and round in circles with no resolution

Printer 😡

Hangers
Door handles as I always seem to get part of my clothing caught on them.

Cling film

My microwave that does a really impatient bleep when he's finished. Then if you put food back in a nano-milli-mono-second too early, the digital displays says "Shut the door" accompanied by another, different, impatient bleeping. He's so fucking rude and frustrating.

My washing machine that very clearly advertises 45 minutes for a 40C coloured wash cycle, and then takes about 90 minutes. Every time I wander into the kitchen to see how he's getting on, he'll change his display to massively increase "time left". Rude and unreliable bastard.

Ha your washing machine has been programmed with the the 'London Underground minute'. When the display board announces the next train is one minute away but it always takes at least 2 1/2 to arrive.

For me it's the printer. You have paper and toner. WHAT ELSE IS THERE? 😡

Henry for me too. The way he collapses so apparently easily without putting up any resistance.

The beeping of the washing machine is so passive aggressive. It pisses me off.

Definitely Henry who's dramatic swooning finally made me banish him for a lovely cordless 😂 smirk at me now you twat😊

Yep, printer. Aarrrggghhh.

My mum's drying rack. It's on it's very last legs and she won't replace it, despite being well able to afford to. It falls apart every flipping time you expect it to do it's one job, and has to be be painstakingly balanced against itself to stay upright.

I don't know what it is with my mum. Something breaks or works poorly and she is apparently like "This is how we live now". One of her bathrooms had no cold water supply for months on end, not in the sink nor the bath nor the shower, and she got totally offended when I suggested it might be time to get in a plumber.

Coat hangers have been know to give me rage!

Impatient bleeping on Bosch washing machine

Resealable packets of dried pasta. You're having a laugh.

Sod metaphorically. A vacuum cleaner is one of the few things I have ever physically thrown in frustration, so I am right with you. In my defence I was over 9 months pregnant at the time.

Most of mine are previous vacuum cleaners TBH. Also a lawn mower, which is much the same thing.

Yep, Henry fucking Hoover. And he's so bloody sturdy that he's probably not going to need replacing in my lifetime. Maybe if I throw him down the stairs...

Coat hangers , just how on earth do they get so sodding tangled with each other.

My printer and laptop have a very on - off relationship, but tbf it's best mates with my phone .

Gas cooker 'safety' feature , turn gas on > use cookers own ignition to light gas > have to hold gas knob pushed in for at least 15 seconds or it turns off

Currently our car. It's a well known American/Nazi electric brand and beeps loudly in a heart attack-inducing way when it decides the trajectory you're on might, just possibly, mow down a pedestrian 500 yards away, or cause a collision with the parked car you're about to steer around. I shout and swear loudly at it every time. I mean, I know how to drive without killing pedestrians or driving into other cars. I've got my licence and everything.

Every printer I've ever met. I can start ranting about them, the rage is bad for me.

My toaster. I used to love it, but it's turned violent recently. Every 3-4 times it won't just pop up it will dramatically lob my toast onto the floor. Git.

Different make, but I had a monumental rant at my car after it screeched at me and slammed the brakes on upon seeing a pedestrian on the pavement 400yrds hence, you know, where I wasn't. Damn near gave me a heart attack. I concluded it was safer to delve into the settings and turn a lot of the "safety" features off, now we're all much happier!

Keep it in the fridge and it is easier to use.

Yep, he'll keep laughing at you even after falling down the stairs. Mine was nowhere near breaking down but I couldn't stand it anymore. Honestly do yourself a favour and parade a new one in front of him. That'll teach him 😂

The printer - works when I have loads of times, won't talk to me when I'm in a rush.

Automated answering: 'If you would like to speak to our sales team, press 1. If you calling to report a fault in our network, press 2. If you are moving home, press 3. If you..... press 67...' Then when you finally press something, they tell you that they value your custom but are having an unusually high volume of calls at the moment and you could be waiting up to 20 minutes. This is quite often a lie, they just want you to email them instead.

My new phone. Won't talk to the car's SatNav as the car is old.

I solved the hoover issue by getting a cordless one.
I still have the one with a flex and had to use it the other day. It does have marginally better suction, but it weighs a bloody ton and the fucking flex wound itself around things it hadn't even been near.

Oh my God, this thread is like rage bait for me!

I reckon it was programmed on the basis of being a new Panzer. Has to be going by the way it goes ballistic at the prospect of a car driving by on the other side of the road.

Dh actually LIKES him