If you were a teen in the 90s did your mum spend a lot of time telling you that she was on a diet?

[Bartg]

Quoting her current weight. The weight she was at school. Whether she put in weight over the holidays or not. And also going on fad diets. Ryvitas, slim fasts etc.
And saying things to you about how you should watch your weight and whether or not clothes are slimming etc etc
this is what my mum did. And her weight was fine. Slim. Basically size 10 I would say.

i am just wondering how normal this was for that generation. It really messed me up and I feel sad for my teenage self

Similar upbringing. Everything home made. Wonderful vegetarian food, no UPF at all, nothing out of a packet. Everyone in the family was slim and healthy until their 50s.

Hmm. Thoughts aren’t facts thankfully.

I don’t remember my mum ever being on a diet. She’s never been slim but not massively overweight either.

Yep, my mum did this. Gave me a life long issue with food, eating, weight obsession, dieting, size. She’s still the same now, yo yo dieting at nearly 80, wants congratulating at any weight loss, comments on my size and if I’ve lost weight every time I see her. If she thinks I need to lose weight she gives me a diet cookery book or tells me about how good the new xyz fad diet is. One of the many reasons that she will never be left unattended with my children

Child of the 80’s but no my mum never mentioned my weight or hers. She was slim until menopause then plumped out a bit but I’d left home by then and it didn’t seem to bother her.

Our meals were typical meat and veg of the time with a small dessert of tinned fruit, ice cream at the weekends. Lunch boxes were terrible! White bread cheese sandwiches and a penguin. But we walked to school, portion size was ‘normal’ and I was a slim child and have stayed slim, now at 50.

2000s for me but yes, my mum was (and is still) ALWAYS commenting on her weight and on some kind of diet. I remember all kind of diet plans and exercise dvds through the year...including Janice Battersby at one point, I'm sure!

Child of the 80’s also. Your post was pretty much my experience too. I still do love a penguin bar 🤣.

OP, have you had any counselling or therapy for these thoughts? It sounds like your mums behaviour has had such a negative impact, and some therapy might help with that.

Wasn't she just. Always dieting. Always talking about what she was eating and whether she was being 'bad' or 'good'. I managed not to inherit her fucked-up relationship with food, but I did it by distancing myself from her and for this and other reasons, our relationship has never recovered. Unfortunately she was successful in transferring some of her biases about weight to me.

Oh yes. But I was properly fat. We both have/had lipoedema.
Now I know what I know about food and fat loss and health I am aghast at the lack of science. Now it's easy to track both what I burn and what I consume. Putting the responsibility to "lose weight" on to a child who has no control over what food they are given is horrendous.

No, don't ever remember my mum talking about being on a diet or losing weight. She was a great cook and we had dinners cooked from scratch and and homemade desserts at every dinner. My friends used to hang around at dinner time in the hope of getting invited to stay. I was a naturally very skinny child (always too thin) I was extremely active so I am sure she was always trying to fatten me up but never said anything. I was healthy and fit despite often looking like a heroin addict! I do know I had one friend whose mum was very image conscious and diet and losing weight was a big part of her childhood. I guess it is no surprise that her and her sisters have all struggled with their relationship with food and have borderline eating disorders.

No, my mum has never been on a diet and neither have I.
I had a friend whose mum was like this though, and it really had a bad effect on my friend and especially her sister.

I was a teenager in the 80s and remember there being a lot of pressure to be slim. Not from my parents just generally. Lots of dieting by people that were slim already. I'm glad my dc haven't felt that pressure and they've certainly no need to diet.

it mainly came from my grandmother who I lived with. Constantly comparing all her daughters weights to each other and then with us, her grandaughters. "Make your grandma proud and be thin, don't let yourself get fat like your cousins." I started vomiting after meals aged 9 but it felt worth it at the time to feel her love and that she was proud of me. It's been a life long battle to undo the thought that I only really matter if I'm thin.

Child of the 80s. My mother was constantly on a diet (cabbage soup, Cambridge, slim fast) and ricocheted between a size 8 and a size 18.

The cupboards were full of special k, ryvita, crisp breads and cup a soups, whilst the drawers were stuffed with sweets and the freezer full of icecream.

She was either being “good” or “naughty” the latter accompanied by a tinkly laugh and a vicious I dare you to comment attitude.

she did slimming world and weight watchers and by the time I was 10 I could recite the calorie content of every imaginable food.

i had an eating disorder by the time I was 12 and have had body dysphoria my whole life, despite never being bigger than a size 12.

oh and I earnestly believed Bridget Jones was fat. We were fucked up by society.

Never - and we never had scales in the house either.

I think it was a good thing and personally I have never been on a diet either, never counted a calorie.

Yes. Knew what weight she was at every age, on her wedding day etc. Dad had her doing sit ups after each birth. Slim fast in the cupboard. Was pleased with me and my sisters when we looked slim in clothes.

Never exercised though.
My Mil was the same. Died of cancer but even towards the end was pleased with her ill health related weight loss.
I've been conscious of my weight my whole life as have my sisters. Have experienced disordered eating.

Dad also extremely fattist, despite being overweight now himself.

No, not at all (80s/90s).

She did attach a lot of shame to eating things like cake ("oh I shouldn't really .."), but she ate it anyway. Still does that now, and still eats it anyway.

She is and always was, a normal size. Slim but not skinny, a bit round in the tummy (probably from a high carb diet).

00s and yup absolutely. Never ever told me I needed to lose weight, but yes constant running commentary about her weight, still goes on to this day in her 60s. She was pretty much always slim.

Mum is still odd around me with food to this day.
I stayed with her recently and she'd made a cake. I asked if we could have a slice and she said "Yes of course. I didn't want to offer it as I know you're not a big eater" - as if I eat like a bird and have an eating disorder!
I have 3 sensibly-portioned, reasonably nutritionally-balanced meals a day, with treats in moderation and would NEVER pass up a slice of homemade cake.

I thought, fuck me, I'm 41 and my weight and eating habits are still under scrutiny.

I hear you. When it’s been constant in your ear as a teen you do absorb it. I sometimes have a thought and really have to have a word with myself , I don’t say these thought out loud though which is a step up from my mum!

until I had a child of my own I thought that the line she trotted out when seeing tiny children having tantrums - you never had a tantrum because the one and only time you started to have one you were smacked round the legs - was an example of good parenting and was correct.

No the only thing my Mum said about dieting was that they didn't work and never to go on one. She certainly never did. Saw it as a fools game and I agree.

Yes. My mum was always on a diet. She still is. My dad still doesn't hide his contempt for overweight people.
Even now if we go out for dinner my mum will comment that she is "being good" if she has a salad and not chips. This was the constant narrative when I was a kid. And of course if her food choices meant she was being good, mine must have meant I was being bad.
Mum ALWAYS had the salad. Always.

As an adult I have incredibly disordered eating and zero self esteem. And, as hard as I try not to, I'm fairly sure I've passed that on to my daughter now too. It's all so fucked up.

I don't remember my Mum talking about dieting or weight.She was always slim.

Some fucking horrible parents on here, for you all.