Page 10 | Potentially life changing inheritance - wwyd?

Lyraloo · 14/03/2025 21:25

NotThatWise · 13/03/2025 20:26

I can see how it comes across that way, but he gave up his job prospects in his 20s so I could chase my dreams. He did everything for the house and 3 kids and all I did was work, and I now earn enough for us to be comfortable so he earns “top up money” for treats and doesn’t have to stay in a job he hates. We aren’t rich by any means, we holiday in the UK and our cars are 15 years old.
but I appreciate the care you have put into your words x

Show quote history

I think the comments about telling your dh that it’s your inheritance and you’ll decide, are totally out of touch. Do these people not realise you’ve been together25 years, by your own account t, you e been a good team and it’s worked for you. If you got divorced tomorrow the courts would not view it as your money, it would be divided between you.

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:32

Fraudornot · 14/03/2025 19:15

So you will loose 20% or more of the sale price

No I don’t. I only had the property valued 3 months ago. It’s not going up THAT much in that time it’s probation versus sale value. I’ll pay max £1k if that

OP posts:

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:40

Holliegee · 14/03/2025 19:44

I don’t think selling your childhood home will ever be easy, but- if you can reconcile this with getting a family home that your children and yourselves really live and it’s like your ‘dream home’ then you can think of it as a stepping stone towards you getting your children that memory too.

it’s funny really houses literally are bricks and mortar and the home is everything inside including the feelings and you take that with you.

I like to think of the lovely big home I had with my ex and when our children were very young as a chapter, the story is ours but now the page has turned and someone else is writing their story in it - and as soon as your parents belongings are out of it - it will stop feeling as if it’s yours.

I don’t really have much practical advice other than to say grief is an extraordinary thing and it does take time but then in that time life does carry on .

Such lovely honest words. Thank you. “Finding” my dad passed in my childhood home pretty much ruined it and any memories we all had. My kids won’t even go there now. So sad as I
grew up there 40 years ago.
I’m starting to see it as bricks and mortar, plus a stepping stone to my future with my kids. I love the idea of chapters, such a great way to view life xx

OP posts:

Mere1 · 14/03/2025 21:47

JaninaDuszejko · 14/03/2025 21:12

Read the bloody thread. Their own house is too small and the inherited house is the same size so the sensible thing to do is sell both and buy a bigger house that fits their requirements.

Show quote history

Goodness me. A charmer. It’s Mumsnet chat.

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:48

Lyraloo · 14/03/2025 21:25

I think the comments about telling your dh that it’s your inheritance and you’ll decide, are totally out of touch. Do these people not realise you’ve been together25 years, by your own account t, you e been a good team and it’s worked for you. If you got divorced tomorrow the courts would not view it as your money, it would be divided between you.

Show quote history

Thank you ❤️. My situation with my DH is not a normal one. Since my father passed he’s been at home again while I work. - I LOVE my job, it’s my escape, but DH does work to top up. We no longer need to top up so having him at home works for me. I can come and go at work as I please while DH does school runs, housework, shopping etc. and gives my brain time to focus on inheritance stuff. As most husbands are, he’s a PAITA 🤣 but I also love him dearly and he keeps me grounded x
Also, I’ve been clear that this is my money and he is totally fine with that. I believe he is a treasure x

OP posts:

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:51

tempname1234 · 14/03/2025 19:55

The inheritance is not enough to not work. Don’t think of giving up your job. Please don’t.

what I would do, as you say you’re squeezed into a 3 bed semi, is to sell both properties and move into a house that suits your needs in an area that works for your continue employment and where your children and both of you are happy to live

alternatively, sell one and rent out one house (patent’s) and mortgage it, using money to buy a home that meets your family requirements.

I’d also use some of the funds for one really great holiday. Then it is back to normal.

while £350 is a huge sum of money, it is not retirement early money. Do not change your lifestyle thinking it would last forever.

Thank you. Luckily I love my work and wouldn’t give it up even if I won the lottery!
Being a landlord in scary, but the idea of a great holiday sounds awesome - we’ve only been aboard once since 2007! X

OP posts:

Podcastlover · 14/03/2025 21:56

We were in a similar position and sold both houses and bought one big house. We sold the inherited house first and then used the money to pay off our mortgage and then sold our house and bought the bigger house and a car each. We still ended up needing a small mortgage but had one lovely house to manage rather than two.

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:59

Layla120 · 14/03/2025 20:10

Ahh lovey I'm so sorry. Thats very hard re your bereavment. Having grown up with and faced the bereavement of my dad alone I really do empathise. Sorry no advice re the houses but I would definitely recommend the bereavment counselling - I needed it and it really helped! Good luck and whatever decision I hope you have a lovely happy life 💕 and just to add - it'll be ok - youve faced the worst now.

Edited

Show quote history

Thank you ❤️. I used to say what doesn’t kill your makes you stronger, but I no longer believe that. We’re not stronger, we’re different. I carry my grief every day, as I’m sure you do, but we learn to walk beside it. Some days are ok, but some days something happens and it takes your breath away.
I will seek help, as I think this is what I need. Sending much love 🧡

OP posts:

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 22:01

Podcastlover · 14/03/2025 21:56

We were in a similar position and sold both houses and bought one big house. We sold the inherited house first and then used the money to pay off our mortgage and then sold our house and bought the bigger house and a car each. We still ended up needing a small mortgage but had one lovely house to manage rather than two.

Are you happier as a result? This is identical to my situation but I’m scared we’re just focusing the attention elsewhere and won’t ultimately be happier? Xx

OP posts:

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 22:06

JaninaDuszejko · 14/03/2025 21:12

Read the bloody thread. Their own house is too small and the inherited house is the same size so the sensible thing to do is sell both and buy a bigger house that fits their requirements.

Show quote history

Thank you. Our current house is too small and inheritance house is similar. To radically change our lives we need to move area. In our current area a 4 bed detached would still require a mortgage (700k+) but we could relocate to Devon and buy the same property for half that…!

OP posts:

CharlotteCChapel · 14/03/2025 22:10

We're in a similar position we're selling both , first house is on the market and we're living in property two. We're then buying a bigger house , no mortgage on house one and using the rest of our inheritance and then selling house two.

Lyraloo · 14/03/2025 22:15

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 21:48

Thank you ❤️. My situation with my DH is not a normal one. Since my father passed he’s been at home again while I work. - I LOVE my job, it’s my escape, but DH does work to top up. We no longer need to top up so having him at home works for me. I can come and go at work as I please while DH does school runs, housework, shopping etc. and gives my brain time to focus on inheritance stuff. As most husbands are, he’s a PAITA 🤣 but I also love him dearly and he keeps me grounded x
Also, I’ve been clear that this is my money and he is totally fine with that. I believe he is a treasure x

Show quote history

It very much sounds like it, you’ve made a life together that works for you both. The trouble with mumsnet is people can be very judgemental and one sided. If you were the SAHM
they would be saying the exact opposite. You do what’s right for you and your family and ignore the negativity. Good luck!

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 22:23

CharlotteCChapel · 14/03/2025 22:10

We're in a similar position we're selling both , first house is on the market and we're living in property two. We're then buying a bigger house , no mortgage on house one and using the rest of our inheritance and then selling house two.

I know we’re not alone, but it feels lonely when making these decisions. It’s nice to know that others are facing the same struggles - in a sense that we are not alone, nothing else. I think we want to sell both and start again somewhere new, but it’s so scary. It’s nice to know others are on the same path. Plus some comments prove that it’s been a success x

OP posts:

Original poster

NotThatWise · 14/03/2025 22:28

Lyraloo · 14/03/2025 22:15

It very much sounds like it, you’ve made a life together that works for you both. The trouble with mumsnet is people can be very judgemental and one sided. If you were the SAHM
they would be saying the exact opposite. You do what’s right for you and your family and ignore the negativity. Good luck!

Show quote history

Thank you. As a mumsnet first timer this is lovely to hear. I believe in our family and that my hubs is a good one ❤️ xx

OP posts:

DailyDoily · 14/03/2025 22:30

wishiwasjoking · 13/03/2025 17:39

Wouldn't describe it as life changing, you'll be paying a shit ton of tax if you sell it.

I'd rent it out personally, especially with the state of the housing market atm.

I’d take some advice on the tax position. Inheritance tax only kicks in at a fairly high level (beyond the amounts you’re suggesting) and there is an additional allowance for passing on property to relatives. If you do rent one out remember you’ll have to pay Capital Gains Tax when you sell (just on the years when either one hasn’t been your main home).

Crazyworldmum · 14/03/2025 23:06

If you always wanted a pace of life and your children can relocate then go for it . Have. Ap e of life whatever than means for you , I did the same ( with not as much money but a little ) left the busy city life in England for rural Scotland and never looked back . Kids are happier , I skipped shopping centre trips for chickens and beach walks and my only regret is not doing it sooner .
whatever you change in lifestyle dream is why not do it while you have a the opportunity . Good luck

TravelDad · 14/03/2025 23:07

I had an inheritance and it meant we could buy our future home before selling the place we lived at the time. This attracts the higher rate stamp duty for a second home but this can be reclaimed if the current home is sold within a certain time frame (we did this and the process was smooth). This took the pressure off having to pack and move in a day. We moved over the space of a few weeks, got the old place sold and then paid off a big chunk of the mortgage on the new place with the proceeds (it was a variable with no early repayment fees).

Not saying this is for you - it means having a big mortgage for a limited time, but I thought I'd throw it out there as something to consider.

Another thing that I'm not sure has been mentioned is to make sure that your children are fully aware of the implications of moving to a new place. The adventure might sound great but it's a big upheaval.

Good luck!

Jimz · 15/03/2025 00:11

If the inherited house is desperate for renovation and you can't afford to do it, then probably sell, but don't be taken for a mug, a tired house isn't rubbish, just can be expensive to update. If a few £ can make it rentable it can bring in much better returns that your money sitting in the bank. A lot of people don't seem to understand if you are realistic about how much money you can expect to make by renting out the house out even if you do a low rental you'll still get a better return than the money in the bank, Selling the house and doing up the one you're in can be tempting, but once the money is gone that's that. Take a bit of time to find out what the potentials are, because if you hold onto the house and do the transfer right to your kids you can mitigate the inheritance tax. I hear a lot of people set up trusts with inherited houses so the greedy government can't steal more money from you. Just my opinions, but my OH family inherited some property and, in my opinion, mismanaged the whole thing and we have lost a lot of money because they are "keen" to get their slice of the cake. My adult kids re good earners yet are struggling to buy, so be aware that you could be on a winner with the right approach...just don't sell for peanuts! Good luck XX🙂

saffronspices · 15/03/2025 00:40

If you've no thoughts of moving into your childhood home, sell it. My parents both died pretty young but my brother and I had already left home and had bought our own homes. You never ever lose the memories of your childhood home - it's 30+ years since we lived there and they've never faded.

Vevevoom · 15/03/2025 03:24

NotThatWise · 13/03/2025 17:19

First time poster, apologies if I missed info or added too much detail.

I have recently inherited my childhood home, owned for 40 years, we are the only people to have ever owned it. House is mortgage free.

I’ll try and layout the facts, and I’m interested to know what other people would do in this situation. What would your future look like?

Childhood home value £350k
My home value £325k, £100k left on mortgage
Both houses are the same size in the same town.
DH (47) and I (43) plus 2 children (8 &12).

If I were you I would keep the inherited home and rent it out. That way you will have an additional income to put towards your mortgage and be able to live a little. And a Little further along the line you will have two homes which you will be able to leave to each of your children.
Being a landlord can be challenging but it can be equally rewarding (financial wise).

Mervyco · 15/03/2025 03:30

From the information you give, sell the family home, pay off your mortgage, and invest the residue.
Your children stay at the same school and keep their friends: your income increases by the mortgage amounts you no longer have to pay, and you do not have the headache of a move.
That, for what it is worth to you, is my advice.

MeTooOverHere · 15/03/2025 05:10

Is there going to be a tax implication for selling one over the other?
ie if you sell the inheritance will you be taxed on it?

Vevevoom · 15/03/2025 07:26

Jimz · 15/03/2025 00:11

If the inherited house is desperate for renovation and you can't afford to do it, then probably sell, but don't be taken for a mug, a tired house isn't rubbish, just can be expensive to update. If a few £ can make it rentable it can bring in much better returns that your money sitting in the bank. A lot of people don't seem to understand if you are realistic about how much money you can expect to make by renting out the house out even if you do a low rental you'll still get a better return than the money in the bank, Selling the house and doing up the one you're in can be tempting, but once the money is gone that's that. Take a bit of time to find out what the potentials are, because if you hold onto the house and do the transfer right to your kids you can mitigate the inheritance tax. I hear a lot of people set up trusts with inherited houses so the greedy government can't steal more money from you. Just my opinions, but my OH family inherited some property and, in my opinion, mismanaged the whole thing and we have lost a lot of money because they are "keen" to get their slice of the cake. My adult kids re good earners yet are struggling to buy, so be aware that you could be on a winner with the right approach...just don't sell for peanuts! Good luck XX🙂

I agree. I’m all for having an extra income which will enhance your current life as you’ll have disposable income to enjoy life.

anyolddinosaur · 15/03/2025 09:11

If you cant afford a 4 bed detached where you are get a 4 bed semi. Cant imagine a location where aa 3 bed is £350k and a 4 bed would be more than £550k.

Post your town/city and let mumsnet see what houses it can find.

angela1952 · 15/03/2025 09:21

NotThatWise · 13/03/2025 21:28

I didn’t use a solicitor, I did all the paperwork myself. Inheritance tax forms and probate were all done by me.
But you’re right, the costs of keeping both going will soon cripple me. Luckily council tax let you have 6 months off in these circumstances otherwise I’d be bankrupt!
Sadly neither our house or inheritance house meet our needs as both are the same size (I was an only child so plenty of room, but I have 3 kiddos).
I do take onboard your comments about running a bigger house - all things I hadn’t considered x

Show quote history

I'm not a financial expert but know that your own home would be free of CGT if you sell it, so best to sell this first? Then your childhood home would be your main residence and future profit free of CGT. The same wouldn't be true if you sold your childhood home first as it isn't your main home and you'd be liable for CGT on any profit after you'd inherited it (though it could be that there isn't yet any profit, it depends what value you declared for the house when filling out the probate forms). It's best to avoid any squabbles with HMRC over tax by following all the regulations to the letter.
As @triballeader says, you need to take financial advice on all this, it's well worth the cost.
Personally I'd say that you'd be best to sell both houses and buy something better that suits you, whilst trying to avoid having any mortgage at all. If you no longer have a mortgage you'd be more able to pay all the regular outgoings so hopefully shouldn't have to worry about this.
I'm a landlord and it's become a thankless task, especially if you do your best to be a good one and follow all the regulations.
I know that it is easy to be sentimental about a childhood home but this really doesn't make sense. Your parents had particular needs and they are unlikely to be the same as yours, your own family's needs should be paramount.