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What to do - possible theft from DC @ school

64 replies

WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 12:54

Odd situation here.

Bit of pre info DC's school have a school coat that whilst no compulsory it's strongly encouraged they wear.

There is a new winter version we purchased this just before Christmas as DC was going up a size

Annoyingly new version has no label in collar or inside seam which can be named as it's reversible.

The name'able label is on the pocket - we stamped this and then to make it easy for DC to recognise we put a ribbon on inside pocket zip.

DC's teacher said the new coats were causing issues because no quickly recognisable name tag and that there is a tab (think like on a pair of Levis x4 bigger) on outer side seam that is white on the reverse side could we name - we name stamped it.

DC are at asmall primary 18 - 20 pupils in each 4 classes - they have an unusual'ish name - no others with same

after wraparound someone else had gone home with his coat.

For wraparound they go into a large classroom place their coats and bags on the tables and go off to wherever - we pick up from that room. DC's bag was there when he came to go but no coat.

They said they definitely placed down. We waited until everyone had gone but there was no one else's coat in its place.

no one in our yr group or youngest DC's had taken home - no contacts in others to ask. So we waited to see if it was brought in by one of the other two classes.

2 days later still nothing. So I insisted that DC be helped to go round all the cloakrooms and look otherwise I would - these coats are £46!

Kindly DC's teaching assistant did this and found in the cloakroom of one of the classes in the year above.

We were on half term last week so I washed the coat (took the ribbon off) and put back on double tying tightly very very tightly and decided to try make coat more identifiable by taking DC's initial keyring off their school bag and adding to outer zip of the coat. Identical to image attached.

On Monday the coat went missing again this time at afternoon break they are not allowed out without but are allowed to take off and place on benches - there was issues with them being chucked everywhere. When DC went to get his had gone. Waited until the end - again nothing in its place.

Again two days coat has not materialised, again teaching assistant searches the cloakrooms - again finds in same cloakroom.

Hung the coat up on Weds night noticed the keyring had gone! Asked DC who said yes they had asked teacher and they didn't really know / wouldn't help (fair enough) started crying. Wants keyring. Instinctively I checked the inside - the ribbon has also gone!!!!

I think we all know what has happened here but obviously no one can 'prove' anything however I think this is completely outrageous.

school are trying to blame a child. There is no way a 7/8 yo would have the time/patience/motor strength/problem solving skills (the coat would need to be laid on something to allow purchase on the zip - like your lap or a table) to get that keyring off (it's the whole thing that's gone not just the decorative part which yes could have been pulled/fallen off).

Took ages to get off bag the bag in first place and really hurt my nails doing so then DH struggled to put it on the zip. Also the ribbon, this was just a very dark grey cotton and blended in with the coat lining - don't think a child would have even noticed to take off. Let alone been able to do those nots + remove keyring without anyone noticing.

Obviously we can't prove but I think inferring it's a low value item we should just let it go is not good enough theft is never okay. For me this goes way beyond a child bringing the wrong item home and a parent ignoring or even removing the name tag that is on that item.

Also it's weird it's been the same cloakroom both times!

OP posts:
WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 12:55

Sorry this is long but didn't want to drip feed

OP posts:
LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand · 22/02/2025 13:01

Do you mean a teacher or a learning support teacher has deliberately taken your child's coat to steal it and then returned it twice to the same cloakroom?
Teachers and assistants have too much to do to faff about with coats
Older children have maybe picked it up by mistake then returned it. Or one badly organised older child
You seem rather paranoid. Don't send your child in the coat if you are bothered as much.

WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 13:10

Eh?!? How on earth did you infer that @LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand of course not 🤣🤣🤣.

I think it's a pupil and their parents have removed and kept they keyring and ribbon.

The coat is the school branded and school 'strongly' recommended coat. I don't want to buy another one.

The point is the identifying items being removed / not given back. And secondary but clearly not provable with the attempt to claim the coat as their child's

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LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand · 22/02/2025 13:12

But it's been returned so probably a mistake. You are making a big assumption about the removal of a ribbon and key ring

WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 13:16

Sorry I should add that this last time it sounds like DC went straight to TA when he arrived last Weds and they went and looked but morning bell hadn't gone and obviously she must have been hampered by DC + not everyone and in they couldn't find it, so she'd one back and looked whilst DC's class were at swimming and all other classes n lessons and found it - in the same cloakroom as last time. I taking from that that it has come in with a child from home that morning after they'd looked.

DC's teacher emailed to tell me they'd found it and told me all this in the email.

OP posts:
WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 13:17

@LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand but DC wants the keyring back - why isn't that or the ribbon there. What are the other possible explanations?

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 22/02/2025 13:21

Sew your child’s initials onto the coat.
Make sure your child does a better job of looking after his things.
You are of course correct that someone is trying to take it but all you can do is make it as difficult as possible for them.
I would hope that school are now wise to this particular child.

MumChp · 22/02/2025 13:22

Sew a label in the coat. Job done.

Smartiepants79 · 22/02/2025 13:23

And I’m afraid you’re just going to have to accept the key ring has gone. It’s shit but you’re not getting it back.

Wobblemonster · 22/02/2025 13:25

Sew an AirTag into the coat!

SometimesCalmPerson · 22/02/2025 13:26

I think it’s worth a complaint. The fact that it keeps happening suggests that your child and their coat has been chosen and that implies targeted bullying.

TickingAlongNicely · 22/02/2025 13:27

Paint their initials inside.

BreatheAndFocus · 22/02/2025 13:28

Yes, it was stolen - twice. Sadly, some people are like that. I used to do two name labels, one obvious and one hidden because once a parent removed the obvious name label on my DC’s coat. Oh, their face when I took the coat from them and proved it was DC’s! They never did it again!

If the coat has been found in the same place twice, the school must know whose peg it was on. They need to identify the child and parent and have a word with them.

Wendolino · 22/02/2025 13:28

LadyMacbethssweetArabianhand · 22/02/2025 13:01

Do you mean a teacher or a learning support teacher has deliberately taken your child's coat to steal it and then returned it twice to the same cloakroom?
Teachers and assistants have too much to do to faff about with coats
Older children have maybe picked it up by mistake then returned it. Or one badly organised older child
You seem rather paranoid. Don't send your child in the coat if you are bothered as much.

It's obvious that OP isn't blaming a teacher or TA. Didn't you read the post properly?

DelphiniumBlue · 22/02/2025 13:28

DS isn't going to get the keyring back.
This is a hazard of school life. You can only make sure that everything is clearly and obviously labelled, in more than one place. Don't attach desirable objects which might also get stolen/borrowed/broken Try to make sure the labelling is hard to remove - red permanent ink on the label you mentioned, plus a name label sewn in plus embroidered name/initials somewhere obvious.
Expensive things will still get stolen but you can make it harder. Or buy the cheap supermarket version.

MumChp · 22/02/2025 13:30

SometimesCalmPerson · 22/02/2025 13:26

I think it’s worth a complaint. The fact that it keeps happening suggests that your child and their coat has been chosen and that implies targeted bullying.

It could just as well be coincidence. It's not as easy to act as a school on a complain like that.

Soontobe60 · 22/02/2025 13:32

BreatheAndFocus · 22/02/2025 13:28

Yes, it was stolen - twice. Sadly, some people are like that. I used to do two name labels, one obvious and one hidden because once a parent removed the obvious name label on my DC’s coat. Oh, their face when I took the coat from them and proved it was DC’s! They never did it again!

If the coat has been found in the same place twice, the school must know whose peg it was on. They need to identify the child and parent and have a word with them.

There is no evidence that the boat was stolen in the first instance

Lindy2 · 22/02/2025 13:34

Sew a name tag in and write your child’s name in permanent marker somewhere on the inside of the coat.

Make it clearly identifiable as your child’s.

PrincessOfPreschool · 22/02/2025 13:36

If the keyring and ribbon were gone, how was it identifiedas yours, especially if it's a 'strongly recommended' coat. Aren't there several in the school?

If it definitely is yours then it's possible that they thought you have stolen their coat and so they removed the items. It may be this child also had a new coat but lost it and took your child's as they were scared.

MissyB1 · 22/02/2025 13:36

It's well known in the school I work at that some parents keep other kids uniform (that comes home accidentally), and rip off name labels and any other identifying features.

MumChp · 22/02/2025 13:52

MissyB1 · 22/02/2025 13:36

It's well known in the school I work at that some parents keep other kids uniform (that comes home accidentally), and rip off name labels and any other identifying features.

Yes. That's why you need to label clothes carefully.

Brickiscool · 22/02/2025 13:53

I think you should sew a small initial on the coat. And put a ribbon on inside again and sew it rather than tie.

WalkinginMemphis2 · 22/02/2025 13:54

@PrincessOfPreschool see my post, sorry if not clear, when the coat arrived new we had used the ink stamper labeller - my preferred method, on the name tag which comes with the coat - this blank tag is annoyingly and unhelpfully on the inside of the inside pocket of the coat 🤪.

Then because this isn't quick to see, DC's teacher asked us to label the back of the brand tag which is on the the side seam of the waterproof shell side of the coat - my DC wears it this side out (they're reversible.) Again we used the ink stamper to do this

When the TA went looking both times this was how she was able to identify the coat as ours - despite the obvious things being removed the second time.

OP posts:
junenotoffred · 22/02/2025 14:15

I have strongly suspected for a while that there are some parents who keep items that will be of use to them. i.e a school coat that is the next size up, accidentally goes home with the wrong child as happens frequently and is then purposely not returned. I'd like to hope it's a genuine mistake but I don't think so, I think less honest people grab the opportunity to acquire something that they need.

MumChp · 22/02/2025 14:17

junenotoffred · 22/02/2025 14:15

I have strongly suspected for a while that there are some parents who keep items that will be of use to them. i.e a school coat that is the next size up, accidentally goes home with the wrong child as happens frequently and is then purposely not returned. I'd like to hope it's a genuine mistake but I don't think so, I think less honest people grab the opportunity to acquire something that they need.

Cost of living has increased this I suppose.