Ideally, what age should a child start preschool?

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I am a SAHM to 1 toddler. We attend groups together and I do plenty of activities with him at home. I don't know any other SAHMs so all my friends DCs went into childcare at around 12 months when they returned to work.

When do we send him to some sort of preschool? Is there an ideal age? Does it make a difference?

When the free 15 hours funding kicks in - the term after your child's 3rd birthday.

Depending on when their birthday is, it'll mean they have either 3, 4 or 5 terms of pre-school before beginning actual school.

Go for somewhere that offers 3 hours each day - it's long enough for them to get used to being away from you, but not too long.

What @Nix32 said.

And when the 30 hours kick in, use them. Big school is a huge shock to their system with the structure and routine if they're not used to being in for longer hours already.

The first term that starts after their third birthday. Eg if their 3rd birthday is November, they'd start in January.

PP says 15 hours. Not sure where that is, but in Scotland you get 30 hours. Most people whose kids have not yet been in any form of childcare start with a few mornings and work up slowly to longer. Obviously this only works if you are not going back to work full time yourself!

It depends when their birthday is and when they'll start school, you want them to have at least a year to get used to the routine, being teacher led , being around large groups of other children and prep for reception. If you want to send them earlier there's no harm even if you're a SAHM it's good for their independence.

Thank you! I had no idea that there were funded hours if you didn't work.

Look for nursery schools attached to schools or similar rather than a childcare nursery. Because this is their primary focus you will probably find it suits your needs better.

Yes preschool is from age 3 generally. Anything beforehand would be nursery IME - ie nothing to do with school readiness.

If DD had been born 1 day earlier, we’d have had 6 extra months of funding 😂😭 as it is, have to wait til September.

Are you in England?
In England ALL 3 years olds get 15 hours from the term after they turn 3.

I think they’re “ready” by around 2.5/3 for half days (9:00-12:30 / or 12:30-3:30). And by 3/4, for full days (9:00-3:30).

Of course, some people need a lot more than that because of work! And the children are absolutely fine and having fun.

But if you have the option, and you’re enjoying being at home, I’d go for half days from about 2.5/3 until they start school.

School nurseries do three different types of sessions - morning or afternoon or all day.

For me, personally, I picked the afternoons as there were more activities on in the morning. So I could pop out, do a thing, drop at nursery, have a rest at home and then pickup. It worked great! But you can’t pick and choose days at school nursery; you have to take all week. That was the downside (I did it for one of mine the year before they started school but not the other because I found the all week thing a bit restricting - my other child went to a private nursery for two days a week instead, 9-5 which was quite a long day but they absolutely loved it there! Me too, I wanted to stay!).

If you’re going to do school nursery, I’d also be inclined to choose the nursery that your child will realistically be going to school at.

Also - if you’re running out of friends with children who are at home, nursery is a great way for both you and your little one to make new friends. My older child is 11 and his best friend is someone from nursery, that he didn’t go to school with! (But I was happy to facilitate that friendship because I really liked the parent, it would have drifted otherwise!)

Look for nursery schools attached to schools or similar rather than a childcare nursery. Because this is their primary focus you will probably find it suits your needs better.

This is false. Private nurseries follow the same EYFS curriculum as School Pre-school. They have to if they want to take funded pupils. They do enhanced transition stuff with whichever school the child is going to. My nursery did all of this, even though we were in a different local authority area from most of the other kids. They still prepare kids for school, they aren't just babysitting.

There are other pros and cons to consider, but in terms of learning objectives, there is no difference.

DON'T go for the 30 hours, unless you need them.

The 30 hours are to support parents who need childcare in order to work - they are not in the best interests of the children.

Pre-school isn't about 'getting them ready' for school - it's an opportunity for them to socialise and develop some independence.

I'm a SAHM and won't be sending my DC to preschool. You can if you want to but you absolutely don't have to OP.

No need to at all. They gain enough social skills by going to groups and meeting up with friends. I wish more people would stop following the herd and realise that nursery and pre-school are terrible!

My oldest went from 2.5 and loved it. He did two afternoons and one morning a week.
Middle child didn’t go as he was with a childminder part time, so had interaction there instead.

Youngest went on and off for about 6 months from age of 3.5 (pandemic so couldn’t start until then) and I gave up. He hated going. I was worried he would be a nightmare starting school but he is in primary 2 now and absolutely loves it.

i guess what I’m saying is, each child is different. Some won’t ever be ready for pre school. Others will thrive from age 2.5

Why on earth are they terrible? My oldest adored it. He had so much fun. My youngest didn’t but that’s ok. I’m glad we had the choice.

Mine went for mornings at 3.5. It was a school nursery so September was the main entry point (difficult to get a place at Easter when they were eligible). We were entitled to 30 hours, but 15 was right for our kids. They still napped at the start and once they stopped napping, enjoyed the downtime. They both had no issues moving to full time for Reception.

Unqualified young inexperienced staff. Very bad behaviour with nothing done about it. Children crying and attention seeking for their parents who leave them so many hours a week. Nothing about working in multiple nurseries ever made me think they were so fabulous!

People choose to work and use them, fine, I don't care but don't go making out like it's a must and you're wierd for not doing it! It was always tough to see parents on a week off and children still at nursery 8-6 everyday, i do worry about the future mental health of these children but I'm sure it'll be OK because their parents had luxury holidays and new cars and clothes!

You might need to look at what's available near you. Nurseries and pre-schools here don't tend to accept less than 2 full days/4 mornings, which is a pretty full time commitment.

My son started at 2 mornings a week when he was 22 months, for work reasons. He went to 2 full days at 2. We've just removed him from going, and he's a lot happier and more relaxed with us - so I'm a bit torn now on what to do. It's supposed to be a temporary stop as they're dealing with chicken pox etc, but he's so much happier. He's very social and outgoing, and I didn't expect him to struggle, but the difference is night and day.

I think there is a big difference between a stay and play type situation and a more extended period away from a parent where kids can develop their own friendships and way of being. I needed nursery for work but would have sent mine for some days from 21/2 even if I wasn’t working.

I think choice of school v private nursery depends on age in the year. I’ve known lot of people with autumn children doing private nursery and then moving to a school nursery for the last year before school but that doesn’t necessarily work if you’ve got a summer baby.

Thank you for all of your replies. It's interesting to hear a range of opinions. I hadn't really thought that it was necessary but then I read some of the comments on the first parents evening thread. I am looking into a few montessori settings local to us and hopefully we can go and take a look soon.

OP my oldest is 10 and all the kids I know who’ve gone to nursery/preschool adapted fine to school. All the kids I know who did zero childcare before school (obviously this is far fewer children, 3 for me) are also totally fine at school. Theres no right answer and it really comes down to your work and home circumstances. :)

@Painauraison either had a terrible experience or is spouting all that having never used a nursery. Look around lots, see what other local parents think, you’ll be fine.

About the time they start to get bored and restless at nursery/playgroup.

Mine were ready for some early years education, and mixing with other kids, at 2 years old.

I agree with a PP that there are some benefits to a pre-school that's part of the primary school you're likely to end up at. DS was at a different preschool but when he started in Reception, we realised that the Reception and Nursery classes did an awful lot together and so he would have had a head start in Reception if he'd gone there.