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Original poster

Would you have second hand wedding rings?

34 replies

WhatTheKey · 15/02/2025 22:49

DP and I will be tying the knot soon in a very small, very unfussy, very "us" ceremony. We won't be dressing up or buying any one-off items for the day- We prefer second-hand stuff generally, and really like buying our clothes/furniture/stuff from charity shops or junk shops.

I've been thinking about rings. Somehow, it feels a bit strange to think about wearing wedding rings that have previously belonged to others- they're such a symbolic item, and obviously, we wouldn't know if they came from happy marriages or not. It is unlike me to think this way!

I wonder if anyone has any thoughts on this?

OP posts:
annlee3817 · 15/02/2025 22:57

I suppose it's not that different from people who have an engagement ring that belonged previously to a family member, but then new wedding rings don't have to be expensive either. I think DH's was £30, tungsten carbide. I'm not superstitious so don't think second hand is an issue

PaintDecisions · 15/02/2025 22:59

When we got married I refused a second hand engagement and wedding ring.

Ten years later and I've realised I was a snob and could have had much more bang for my buck if I had! 😂

Same for wanting a new wedding dress which now is sat, stained and folded, under my bed and has only been taken out once in that time...

MsPug · 15/02/2025 23:02

Both ours are and we are celebrating our 30th this year 😊

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MuddyPawsIndoors · 15/02/2025 23:04

I worked in the jewellery trade for years and insisted upon secondhand wedding and engagement rings!

We got so much more for our money and really nice styles that you don't really see much now.

TheLandslideWillBringItDown · 15/02/2025 23:07

Yes I have a 1920s 18ct gold engagement ring and a victorian 18ct gold wedding band! £700 for both. I love second hand jewellery its got such a history to it

laoeuns · 15/02/2025 23:08

No, I wouldn't. I'm happy to have a lot of things secondhand but I liked the idea of rings being fresh for our marriage, and not having a history. And our rings were plain and not particularly expensive anyway.

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 15/02/2025 23:08

Most gold has been recycled so often it is countless. Some of the gold in a’new’ wedding ring was probably worn by a Roman merchant , or possibly even earlier, an Iron Age chieftain . It’s a precious substance, valued by every age, used and reused. Silver is less valuable, but even so it has probably been melted down and recast several times.

Personally , I rather like being connected through ‘my’ jewellery to previous eras and wearers…..

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 15/02/2025 23:21

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 15/02/2025 23:08

Most gold has been recycled so often it is countless. Some of the gold in a’new’ wedding ring was probably worn by a Roman merchant , or possibly even earlier, an Iron Age chieftain . It’s a precious substance, valued by every age, used and reused. Silver is less valuable, but even so it has probably been melted down and recast several times.

Personally , I rather like being connected through ‘my’ jewellery to previous eras and wearers…..

I love that idea about how old the gold in a ring is and who has worn it over the years!

DH and I both have rings that belonged to grandparents. Obviously we don't know all thd ins and outs of their relationships, but its been nice to keep them in the family

Youcanpayit · 15/02/2025 23:38

Whatever the reason for a ring being sold on, it was bought with good intentions the first time round. Buying a pre loved ring gives it a new start and a new good intention. It wouldn't matter to me to have one.

MumChp · 15/02/2025 23:39

No but rings weren't important to us.

Pigsinblankets13 · 15/02/2025 23:44

My engagement ring is second hand vintage from Brighton lanes! My wedding ring was made out of the gold from my nan and mum's (first set!!) wedding rings...so you could say second hand 🤣

RogueFemale · 15/02/2025 23:47

Wouldn't bother me at all, I'm like you I love 2nd hand / vintage / antique. Jewellery is no different, and as a PP said, the gold in whatever you get will have been used before. I've sold unwanted gold jewellery (inherited) as scrap, and the stuff will have been melted down and turned into 'new' stuff.

MuddyPawsIndoors · 15/02/2025 23:49

With regards to the ring's history and whether the previous owner may or may not have had a happy marriage, you have to remember it's just a piece of metal.

Of course you'll attach a lot of sentiment to it but sentiment doesn't travel with the metal, unless you knew the previous owner (as in passed down through the family etc).

If it was any other metal object - like a frying pan for example, you wouldn't question it's 'previous history'.

bluesatin · 16/02/2025 00:17

My wedding ring is a Victorian mourning ring.

margegunderson · 16/02/2025 00:31

My engagement ring was second hand (and beautiful) and my wedding ring was my great grandmother's. Been married 31 years and was engaged for maybe 5 years before that (couldn't be arsed to organise a ceremony). Engagement ring is much nicer than we'd have afforded new, partly because of the colour of the stone.

Devianinc · 16/02/2025 00:47

If you found some gorgeous wedding ring that you needed to have then that’s ok. Starting out new, simple white or yellow gold bands are perfect and go with anything. Do whatever you want.

Devianinc · 16/02/2025 00:47

I mean like antique in a shop or something.

Lorelaigilmore88 · 16/02/2025 00:48

Yep. I did. Get it cleaned and you can get gorgeous stuff.

PandaTime · 16/02/2025 01:19

Think of it as vintage rather than secondhand. People are a lot less snobby about "vintage" things.

akaFrosty · 16/02/2025 01:48

Yes I would go with second hand. As per the pp, it's all reformed anyway so not 'new'.
Personally I adore jewellery that has a history because that's what it represents to me. Particularly vintage gem stones. My engagement ring is very old. I have no idea where it's been before, but I love to imagine who wore it years ago. I adore it and I'm certain that it's previous owners adored it too. My wedding band was new, but only because I had it made to fit with my engagement ring. You can get much more for your money too if you buy previously owned.

Largestlegocollectionever · 16/02/2025 01:52

I’m not married but it’s one thing I’d insist on being second hand! I also wouldn’t want a blood diamond to be symbolic of our love! Love antique jewellery too 😍

Greenfinch7 · 16/02/2025 01:59

We have second hand wedding rings- they are so beautiful; I like them more than any new rings I have seen. I guess I associate new jewellery with human rights abuse and environmental destruction, and I associate old jewels with conserving and savouring what we already have- doing no harm.

jennyofthenorth · 16/02/2025 02:06

we just picked up a ring at walmart. Like $25! I work with kids and wanted something special that I wouldn't be like "OMG" if it got ruined.

Scorchio84 · 16/02/2025 02:17

If you're not fussy types then why not? Would you wear them daily? Maybe that makes a difference?

My OH & I aren't ring type people but as luck would have it my deceased parents wedding rings fit us so for that part of the ceremony in City Hall we can use them, I also wouldn't have an engagement ring

To add there are beautiful vintage rings engagement & otherwise, it really is horses for courses

Congratulations btw

TruthThatsHardAsSteel · 16/02/2025 03:10

My engagement ring is Victorian. Wedding ring also second hand. As was my dress. Literally would do it all over again