Genuinely how do you respond in this parenting scenario?

[Settyhetty]

Young son aged 7. In the mornings he is so slow doing everything to the point we are late to school and me to work. I gave him countdowns, warnings etc but he is just slow.

do you them implement a consequence or is it better to ramp up the encouragement and even dress him? I don’t want to move back to doing everything for him

Ramp up encouragement.
Streamline the process and number of stairs or room changes.
Make the last tasks things that can be done on the move / that he will mind missing.

I'd sir him down, set out the schedule, pictures if necessary. Say we're sticking to it. Then give him reminders so you go and, when you are ready to leave the house, just bustle him out. If he's not ready, then he goes as he is. I still do this with my older teen, who often rushes out still pulling his clothes on.

Wake him up half an hour earlier so you have time?

I have one child who is like this and I have resorted to dressing him. I already wake him ridiculously early and sometimes there's just no alternative!

Wake him up earlier, visual timetable

Definitely ramp up encouragement and limit access to whatever he does to stall. So for instance, don't go downstairs until he's dressed. Once he's had breakfast and done his teeth he can watch ten mins of TV. If he's super fast then fifteen. If slower then less/none because there's no time.

Have everything ready the night before: uniform (including underwear and socks), toothbrush, paste, and hair comb in the bathroom; shoes, bag, and coat by the back door. I'd even prepare cereal in a bowl in the fridge—just add milk! Gamify it with Google Home reminders or sand timers, rewards, and encouragement.

Is he capable and choosing not to? I'd be going down the consequences route myself! 7 is plenty old enough to understand. Most children will faff if allowed to.

Does he have screens in the morning? If so don't let him watch anything until he's up, breakfasted and dressed, then he can watch ten minutes before you leave if he's ready in time.

We do similar, except we sit and read a book together if there's time as we don't do screens much.

This.

I always found bribery to work far better than threats.

Wake him up on time and make sure he has a watch. Then take away 15 mins of Xbox time (or whatever he likes) for every 5 mins he’s late. No reminders no cajoling. Within a week he’ll be on time.

I've got one of those she's nine and still incredibly slow. The only thing that helps her speed up is feeling like it's a race or a challenge. Consequences don't do anything but make everybody unhappy and bribery doesn't result in longer-term change for us. We use a challenge app every night where if she does quests she earns coins to feed her creatures in the game. So like she'll earn five coins for brushing her teeth before 7:30 and four coins for putting out her clothes for tomorrow and two coins for putting her dirty stuff in the laundry basket. So she does everything each night before bed she packs her school bag does her reading diary puts her clothes out and every morning job we've taken away and put into the night before has reduced the stress level in our house

What is taking him a long time? Are you trying to fit too much into the morning routine? Surely all that needs to happen is getting dressed, brushing teeth, a quick face flannel, and eating toast/cereal. This can all be done in about 10 minutes.

I’d tell him I’m not going to keep chasing him, but if he’s not dressed on time in future, he’ll be going to school in his pyjamas.
Once should do it. 😈

He goes to bed earlier and gets up earlier until he learns to speed up in the morning.

Put the things he wants to do most, last in the schedule eg breakfast and TV.
Toilet, teeth, dress upstairs first.
If he's not quick enough he'll have to eat a banana in the car.
If he gets on with everything then he'll have time for TV.

Streamline the process. I used to get up earlier but we ended up late as the kids just faffed about and lost track of time. Now we all have a lie in and then have 30 mins to get up, breakfast, hair, teeth, changed and out. I don't get myself ready until 10 minutes to go. It's then all go go go! So when I say 'GO', they know that i mean it. There are no second chances. There's no time to get distracted. I oversee everything and it's fast paced, but efficient. We're now a well oiled machine.

Start earlier

I took my DS to school in his pj's once as he was dilly-dallying so much. He never, ever, was that slow again.

And we never watch TV in the morning, can't bear the 'but it's nearly finished...' moans.

Consequences, assuming no ND.

Everything possible got ready the night before to save time in the morning. We'd get ready side by side, absolutely no screens/TV, used to turn mine into zombies stood on one leg putting a sock on for several minutes.

The only way I found worked was doing it all along side them ideally all in the same room otherwise the faffing would begin without close supervision and we'd end up late.

We all get dressed together, me included. We do our teeth together, brush our hair together.

Otherwise at least one of us, and possibly all of us, will get side tracked.

He's not doing it to be naughty. Punishments won't help.

We had this. We stopped any toys, tv etc until after they are washed dressed eaten and brushed teeth.
They soon realised .

One of mine was like this. I'm a shit mother and fortunately he's a forgiving soul.

On one occasion we drove to school with him in his pyjamas and he got dressed while his siblings went in.

Another time (it was summer) I made him walk in his socks- it wasn't fair for dd to be late because he couldn't get himself ready. He put his shoes on at the school gates- I have no idea of what the teacher on duty thought.

As an adult, he has his shit together and is never late, has a fabulous wok ethic and appears to have forgiven me.

This was me as a child! I was a daydreamer and could take fifteen minutes fastening one button. I drove my mother wild. So I have no advice but lots of sympathy