When is it time to just embrace the grey?

[MeinKraft]

I know the proper sensible answer is ‘whenever you want to’ but I don’t know if i want to. I think grey hair looks really cool on other people but on me it just makes me look even more frumpy. I’m quite fed up that i’m not even 40 yet (but on the cusp of it) and i suddenly have a head full of greys and arthritis and haphazard periods 😅 I thought this was all about 15 years away!

Anyway. Should i grow out my greys? Keep dying them and risk looking daft? What did you do with yours? I’m not talking about few nice silver streaks, i’m talking a full head of grey and the non grey bits are mouse brown 🤔

I developed this last year too. I'm having highlights to try and blend them in. Dark hair looks so much better than blonde on me, but blond looks a hell of a lot better than my grey.

I think hair condition is worth considering, one of the reasons I just decided to embrace the grey was that the blond dye fried my hair. Now I am about 50% grey and my hair is smooth with no frizz so it looks better. I wasn't totally committed to it, just thought I'd try it and I could always just dye it again. It was over a year ago that I cut the last dyed hair and I haven't felt the need to go back to it

I have dark chestnut hair and have gone almost blonde to cover the grey. It's far better than getting a dark colour. I have highlights so not one overall colour. But l admit l have to get it done regularly and it is expensive.
My dsis had black hair and her hair became resistant to dye so she cut it as short as possible and let it grow out white..not grey. She gets so many compliments and my dd and her friends all say l want to look like that when l get older. She did change the colours she wears against her face so more lilac/ pale pink etc and it's gorgeous
But at early 60s l cannot quite do that yet. She is 10 years younger than me and grey since mid forties.

Go for a balayage which doesn't touch the scalp. I became sensitive too.

It needs doing less often.

My decision was made for me in 2019 (when I was 43) when I developed allergies to dye. I had highlights (babylights they were called) to help the transition but as they were more blonde they didn’t suit me so much. (I’m naturally dark).

Since then, my grey has come fully through and I bloody love it. I’m quite lucky though that mine is quite silvery and still shiny. I’ve had so many compliments since I’ve gone grey, too, that I never got before.

The only thing you can do is give it a go and see what you think.

I'd say to all those embracing: good for you. The brutal fact is that grey suits women with hair with nice texture, usually thick/wavy/curly hair, a certain type of face, usually young-ish or blessed with youthful looks in their older years

I think @Clickedthewrong has made some good points. I have wavy hair, nice texture, etc. and think it kind of suits me.

Also, whilst not quite the white-silver some lucky women have, it is fairly silvery as opposed to metal grey.

So I think it can depend on many factors. I’m not totally resigned to the natural lock. I have a few blonde highlights and low lights I put in myself albeit in a rather have hazard way! But to me, just dying your hair eg dark brown seems a bit pointless; I’m not sure it makes you look younger. And younger doesn’t always mean better. I had an elderly aunt in her 70s with the most beautiful white-silver hair, almost like a fairy. It would have been a shame to dye that a course brown. OTOH Joan Collins’ box dye look in her 80s is great on her!

It really is each to their own - though I do get the “quandry” in going about finding that, OP.

I'm older than you but have never dyed my hair. My blonde hair is steadily getting greyer! And yes welcome to the world of random joint pain

I had my hair in foils just bleached from the age of 37 to 45. Had it coloured for 3 years and now back to foils. Love it, few real whites now in between the grey, black and blonde

Yes @EsmeWWax i found hairdresser highlights etc ruined the condition of my hair over time. Made it very dry and frizzy towards the ends.

Also blonde highlights tend to go a dirty beige nearer the ends over time even with regular toners.

There'll be a poster who'll come along soon and show us all pics of her grey hair OP.

Personally I don't think I ever want to stop dying my hair but I'm in my mid-fifties now so I expect there'll come a time when I'll get fed up but probably not for another 15 years or so.

Those with allergies - what were your reactions? I’m desperate to dye my hair but have developed a fear of allergic reactions!

I usually post my pics - is that an issue?

@DownWhichOfLate - I had a really itchy scalp but I also used to feel as if my heart was racing at times too. (Not sure if that was a symptom as such). I have other sensitivties and intolerances so didn’t want to risk it anymore.

Thank you for the suggestions @overthinkersanonnymus and @justasking111 😊

Try herbal dyes - not just henna, there are others inc mixes. I stopped using chemical hair dye when it started burning my scalp. The henna I use is so much nicer and my hair is a much better condition. I get compliments on the colour all the time. I just touch up the roots every 4wks or so and that’s very easy.

I let mine grow out at 43 and liked the grey but didn't love my natural colour between the greys which was a mix of mousy at the front and mid brown at the back. I had a load of bleach balayage put in so I could keep the roots the same colour and not have to deal with grow out but I could put fun colours in the bottom half. I kind of like it but now there is bleach in there again I realise how lovely and soft my hair was with no dye. I think I will grow it out again and leave it. You'll not know until you try to be honest!

Thanks @GreyRooted I’ve developed some allergies recently and am not sure whether to risk it. I might try henna instead!

Never it's like giving up, very few people can look good grey

I’m in my 60s and I’m not ready to embrace the grey, neither am I going for the ubiquitous blonde highlights because blonde hair just doesn’t look nice on me. It’s expensive though.

I’m fully grey now and constantly being told it’s a nice colour, it suits me, rarely had this with the home dye job tbh. Quite a few colleagues have said they hope their hair looks as good when they go grey. I’m not fishing for compliments and they aren’t trying to butter me up either.
I’ve actually gone shorter in a long pixie style so still quite feminine, I wear makeup, look after my skin, my hair’s in great condition, I don’t think I necessarily look younger, more just my age.

Most don’t look good with a helmet of black or dark brown hair. How dare you say we’ve given up. People still know how old you are despite a head of tasteful honey blond hair, whether it be wrinkles, saggy jowls, gait, voice.

I grew mine through early forties. I’d say it’s definitely aged me but I don’t care, the continual dying and then having the grey come through was worse. I’d rather spend the money on skin care and the gym. I have thick wavy hair with about 20% grey. Purple shampoo and conditioner have made the grey a nice shiny colour.

I miss having luscious long dark locks but even if I dyed it those days are gone, the texture has changed and my hair falls out a lot more now so I keep it fairly short.

I’m a bit older but had to embrace the grey in my mid fifties due to reacting to dye. In my case it started with a sinus headache which would last for two days after dyeing. Then the last time I got a swollen band of red across my nose and cheeks.
I grew it out during the pandemic then had it cut short and have kept it that way. I do get compliments sometimes. I have days when I love it and days when I don’t.
I do feel I have to make more effort with make up.

I have black hair with a few silver strands. I won't be dying it.

Blonde highlights always look terrible. Lovely, glossy hair with strands of coarse, yellow straw-like hair!

No way no how am I embracing the grey, lol. It would not suit me. Some people defo look great and if you are one, then lucky you, crack on. Me, I went blonde and that’s my current plan for the foreseeable.