From what age did you know your child was gay?

[palomaAndCaesarSalad]

Goodness me I don't even know where to start with this. I have 4 sons, all different personalities and different ages, my eldest is 28 and my youngest is 2, almost 3 years old, my first 3 were very different from my youngest, they all loved copying dad, driving ride on cars and wanting toy toolboxes, tractors etc, now my youngest dc likes to raid my makeup bag, loves to brush his hair, loves watching little girls unbox toys on YouTube, he's so sweet and loving and doesn't like spending any time around his older brothers or cousins, he is much more comfortable around girls xx

A gay 2 year old ? This has to be a wind up ?

Do you actually mean he is 2?
You can't label a 2 year old!
He's a toddler
One of my sons is gay by the way

I know it sounds very strange, it's just my other 3 weren't like this, is it common for a 2 year old to like girly things? No it isn't a wind up I'm just curious, I wouldn't care if he was I would just like to know what people think x

If he is gay he’s been gay since he was in the womb? About 3/4 years old I knew my son was gay. He is now 23 and still gay. It doesn’t start or end at an age.

I have two sons aged 18 and 15. The younger one is gay and I had an inkling since he was around 7 as he had loved wearing princess dresses and the NHS website at that time said this could be an indicator of being gay - I think now he would be labelled trans and god knows what would happen. His friends have always been primarily girls or boys who came out in primary school. He 'came out' at around 13/14 but it wasn't a big deal.

Both my sons are very loving and affectionate and both quite liked vehicles etc as toddlers but neither has any interest in them past the age of around 3, and they are close.

None of these things are to do with being gay.

Was just coming on to say what @AtomicRuby said.

Nothing you have said is anything to do with what a child's sexuality is going to be.

So how does it work for when kids are hetero, or bi, or asexual? What are the signs for those?

wtf?

op you know men can like all of those things and still be straight right? And manly men can still be gay?

This.

Hetro boys will play with trains and hetro girls with dolls, silly. If they’re Bi they play with both. Asexual - no toys? 🤔 That’s how it works, right?

And here was silly old me assuming that toys are toys and not in any way related to gender or sex!

He may be sexually attracted to men, but you will not know until he is sexually attracted to men.

Liking stereotypically female things probably tips the odds, but is in no way set in stone.

Some of the 'campest' men I know are straight.

Does it matter?

I have 3 daughters, DD1 would be labelled your stereotypical girl, pink, sparkly, into dolls, dancing make up, she’s not gay, DD2 from the minute she could talk she was more like a boy than most boys, by the time she’s was 5 she dressed like a boy, loved dinosaurs, hated pink or anything remotely girly, we just went with it, let her be herself, I did think at one point she’s trans now she’s an adult I think she’s still figuring it out, definitely not into men, I would guess asexual right now. DD3 she sort of went with the flow not overly girly like DD1 but not anti girly like DD2. At about 11/12 she stopped wanting to wear dresses, shorts, tight clothes, at 14 she came out and said she was a lesbian. I’m happy she could tell us.

Oh OP I have a DS too he was last born he played with a mix of traditional pink girls toys and boys toys thanks to DD2. We never distinguished between the two so he was as happy playing with pink heels and a pink kitchen as he was a digger. He’s not gay. I don’t think toys make children gay, one of his favourite things he loved to play with me was hair and make up, it was his thing with me, with his Dad he did the rough and tumble stuff, I have a health condition I can’t do that so he found a way to play with me.

People are being difficult

The op is genuinely trying to work something out

No need to berate her!

fgs even the poster who said she knew at 3/4 had a go

When she told me she had a girlfriend! Didn't think much of it before then because either was ok with us. I don't think interests = sexuality.

When they TOLD me they were gay. Before that, any parent can spin and spin but it does no good.

my youngest dc likes to raid my makeup bag, loves to brush his hair, loves watching little girls unbox toys on YouTube, he's so sweet and loving and doesn't like spending any time around his older brothers or cousins, he is much more comfortable around girls xx

You seem to be caught up in stereotypes. Let your kid live. If you're getting a strong vibe that he "doesn't like spending any time around his older brothers or cousins", I'd check that out - does he just not enjoy it and therefore avoids them (OK, but maybe awkward in the family dynamic), or is there any chance that they may have hurt him in some way?

im assuming you are being sarcastic... a 2 year old doesn't care if its playing with a hoover or a lawn mower, they will play with whatever takes their fancy.

i'm gonna get me some popcorn cos this one is going to be a belter

But OP doesn’t need to work anything out. He is who he is - a child. He likes what he likes. He may be gay, he may not be gay. At 2 years old it is not relevant.

My cousin was a very “girly” toddler. He played with his big sisters toys and makeup. Used to love wearing dresses and stuff like that. People used to joke he was gay even when he was very young…

He was! He’s married now to another man.

On the other hand, my ds also used to love reslly girly things when he was a toddler. Playing with his big sisters toys. He liked dinosaurs and cars too but he did like wearing his sisters bows and headbands.

Hes 9 now and will give a groan of disgust if something pink touches him

Your ds is young. He might stay as he is, he might grow up and change.

Apologies to @palomaAndCaesarSalad , I also was being genuine as well, because I've always assumed that kids are just kids at that age. I've known so many young children who were feminine boys or tomboys who grew up straight and masculine boys and girls girls who also were straight as adults. I also have known those who were very fluid as teenagers, lots of not being sure what they were or liking both, but as adults just became into one sex or the other. I was born in the early 80s, I think we were less quick to label then, or maybe we knew a lot less about child development and sexuality.

I think you're getting an unnecessarily hard time here op, like a pp we thought there was a possibility my eldest may turn out to be gay from age 3/4. He didn't only like stereotypical girls things, he liked trains, climbing trees and dressing up in my clothes. If buying princess dresses for boys had been a thing then he would definitely have wanted one. He's 24 now and is gay, I just kind of always knew.

Whilst I think the OP is being a bit silly about the toys etc I am surprised no one has mentioned that statistically the youngest of 4 boys from the same mother is more likely to be gay.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraternal_birth_order_and_male_sexual_orientation

My son had a pink kitchen, loved and knew all the words to Moana and Frozen and liked to dress in my clothes and heels as a toddler until about age 4. Now jf I mention it he denies all knowledge and is definitely not gay. Not that I would mind. But just to say that doing these kinds of things as a kid means nothing in terms of their sexuality.

My man was (still is!!) more interested in anything girl related.
He got on with the girls much better at school, and preferred the "options" tge girls were given such as needlework etc.

He is very much a man, and I love the way he can relate to me about issues that I'd used chat to my girl mates about.
He can knit, his sewing is neater than mine, and t couldn't be more proud of him.

He leaves me in no doubt on whether he fancies me... he's a healthy mixture of rough and tumble, but he can be the tenderest person and always emotionally available.

OP, I'm not boasting about my chap, I'm just trying to illustrate that how your youngest son is, is how he is.
He's to be admired as he develops, if he sticks to his guns, and do feel intimidated by his elder brothers displaying a different way forward.

I'm sure you do, but love him for the individual he is.