DRY Another Day! Dry January 2025 thread #2.

[TheYeaSayer]

Here it is folks, let’s carry on keeping it dry.

Are we there yet?
Nearly… there is a little pinprick of light at the end of the tunnel.

We can do this! 💪💪

Thank you @Addictforanex ! That means a lot 🙏 Everyone on the thread has done so well. There’s no way I could have got this far without the thread as well, it’s really kept me accountable, so big thanks to the OP for starting it.

Day 26. Can’t believe I’m typing that! I scrolled back to my first post on this thread on January 1st, and it’s quite an eye opener. Because I haven’t had a hangover for a while now, I think I’m guilty of forgetting how bad alcohol can make you feel:

Joining the Dry January crew feeling hungover after New Year’s Eve celebrations yesterday. My drinking has got way out of control in recent years and I think 2024 was my worst year ever. I’ve been regularly drinking a bottle of wine a day, sometimes more. I feel sluggish, bloated, irritable, depressed, exhausted and generally just awful. I’m signing up to DJ because I want a fresh start and to reset my relationship with alcohol.

Day 26! It’s becoming the norm a bit more now, much more focus on food (actually cooking!) and much more time, particularly mornings. Struggle to relax sometimes but getting there. Well done everyone!

I like your suggestion @SandrenaIsMyBloodType to have a post Dry January alcohol “rules”
as something healthy to aim for and avoid the all or nothing thinking.

I swing between thinking I will not drink again at all given I have managed so far to thinking oh just the one at weekends, or just when I am at a special event or just with really good food or just at a family event etc. However I know that I will not stick to just the one, and that is problematic.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how I have for many years used alcohol to make myself feel better, it has become a way of getting through bad times. That is what I would like to change.

Checking in for day 25. Had a bit of a stressful week which involved ferrying DM to & fro hospital for an operation but in a way it motivated me to stay sober as I wanted to make sure I was able to drive at any time.
Was out with friends to karaoke on Friday - I’ve discovered that’s a lot harder to do sober 😂

Well done everyone, I didn't even realise we were so close to the end. January has kind of just blurred into one long, crazy busy month.

I won't lie, I am looking forward to a glass of wine, but also feel like I have detoxed my liver after the festivities of xmas season.

@RedxRobin karaoke sober is not something I could do. Impressive!

I’m safely through my social occasion and still sober. Now back home and having the usual negative thoughts about people not liking me, how boring/not fun I am sober, disliking myself etc. I’ve had massive social anxiety since childhood and alcohol has always been a way to cope with social situations.

Am very proud of myself for making it through without a drink though. I feel the end of DJ is now in sight and I can do this.

@newme2025 i get the same. Alcohol very much helps my social anxiety but for me it’s a double edged sword as I then have too many drinks & then spend the next day worrying that I’ve made a tit of myself & everyone thinks I’m an idiot.
I’ve been trying to make an effort to go out this month to prove that I don’t need to have a drink in order to socialise. I think it has helped but it still is hard for me to do.

I thought about having a wine this weekend. I went out with DH for a pizza in a lovely Italian restaurant and I was sorely tempted by the Bardolino. I've come this close though, so I ordered an Italian soda instead.

I have a social event next Saturday, and I know it will be February, but I don't want to drink whilst I'm there I don't think. I don't want my mindset to default back to alcohol! I'm on 289 days alcohol free since last Jan, I think I'd like to get to 365 as quickly as possible.

Well done, everyone.

@bookaholic73 how are you doing?

I think you're similar to me and have dropped off a few times but you are still welcome here.

I have dropped off again today, which makes 4 days in Jan for me. Obviously not great for dry Jan but a huge improvement on before. It had definitely opened my eyes a bit

Just checking in, going strong without alcohol, find it pretty easy but the sugar cravings are not easing off. No weight loss. I am also struggling with moderation, so I think my rule will be to drink only on special occasions rather than any weekends. So, that likely to be a Prosecco to share with DH on Valentine’s and not sure when next. Just a meal out or night with friends will not be drinking reasons.

Final weekend of January done, we’ve all done so well, just five days to go!

You've all done amazingly!!!!

It's interesting how we have all used alcohol, isn't it?

Some are cutting out the 'it's the weekend!' -drink; some the 'bottle every night'; some the 'I can't moderate, if I have one I will get hammered and make a tit of myself' etc

I was drinking too much, too regularly, definitely, but thankfully I can't remember the last time I made a fool of myself, thank heavens! 😬 But my drinking tended to be a bottle over 3-4 hours, watching TV, most nights.

Anyway, whatever our motivations, we've gone amazingly well, especially those who tripped up but who climbed straight back on the wagon. Well done! Day 26 and our last weekend done, for the Damp Feb Folks!

I don’t remember feeling before that I had shifted my relationship with alcohol since I became aware it wasn’t what I wanted it to be. I do now. Don’t know how long it’ll last but I may have got free of the immediate desire for wine at tea-time. Even on Fridays!

Day 27. Only five more days to go, can’t quite believe it! I had a bad sleep again last night and have more spots on my face than I did at the start of DJ. I had always put those things down to alcohol but clearly they’re not, which is good to know. Like someone said early in the month, I’ve seen DJ as a bit of an experiment to find out what my body is like without alcohol. So the spots/sleep outcome is valuable information. I obviously need to work on other ways to tackle those things. The good thing about not drinking is that I still feel relatively fresh in the morning even with a bad sleep, whereas if I was hungover I would really struggle.

I’ve also lost half a stone - hurrah!

I’m starting to think about February too. As much as I’ve been looking forward to the end of DJ, this month has made me really reassess my drinking and relationship with alcohol. Although I will go back to drinking, I really want to cut down enormously from my previous levels and am trying to work out the best way to do that. It may be that I don’t drink at home at all and only have wine on social occasions. Or I might do four nights off alcohol a week and three nights drinking - that might be more realistic.

That’s what I was doing before Christmas and it’s what my DH does. I’m not sure it works for me- the improvement in my eye bags and perimenopause symptoms and my general mood has been quite enlightening (and slightly horrifying). Problem is I fixate on getting to the weekend so I can have a drink. I’d like to be able to enjoy a nice glass of wine or a good single malt, but I don’t want to feel deprived if/when I don’t have them, and I don’t want to have a drink just because it’s Friday 6pm. I’m not sure what will work for me! I’m considering giving wine up except for special occasions, but again not really sure.

In all honesty I should just quit altogether. But I don’t want to do that because I do enjoy some aspects of drinking!

If I did stop drinking permanently, I would probably avoid all social situations. Whilst I’ve shown this month I can get through them, it’s a real struggle and exhausting when sober. I’d rather just stay home.

I have been quite social this month, but it is preferable to do coffees or breakfasts for me in Jan as a lot of my friends are drinking. I found my first Dry Jan quite difficult (in my early twenties!) but it’s got easier. Breakfast is a very good option though - you see your friends, no one’s chugging the G&Ts and there’s no expectation of breakfast boozing.

I think with being bored at night - I have had flickers of that but just wondered what I would do if I were bored at 10am, and go and do that. My tax return gets done this way! Now THAT’S boring.

@newme2025 much of what you say resonates with me.

If I'm honest, I'm a little bit disappointed in how little different I feel. I'd ascribed quite a lot to my bottle a night habit, and was looking forward to the clear skin, bright eyes, taut skin, weight loss, great sleep and zest I was sure lay beyond (fortunately I'm not really an anxious person beyond the changes menopause brought), but the chief beneficiary has been my wallet 😁.

Admittedly I am a sceptic, a world-view that has saved me from much disappointment over the years, (but I acknowledge may also have dampened life's highs a little, too 🤔).

I read some quit lit but the evidence of my own 60 year experience tells me my maiden aunt's one-sherry-at-Xmas habit does not place her on the same trajectory as the homeless drunk swilling anti-freeze.

I read how with our two-glasses a night habit, we'll suddenly be catapulted into end-stage liver failure; but 40 years of radiography in frontline NHS hospitals doesn't support the alleged numbers.... but I sure as hell wouldn't go to my GP to discuss my alcohol consumption as I don't want my 'moral failure' and 'shameful weakness' ('excess ETOH') on any of my medical records! NHS staff DO judge, you know...

Which is where to my mind the issue lies: how heavily and censoriously alcohol is demonised to being a dirty little secret. It is impossible outside of supportive threads like these to have a sensible discussion about why we drink, middle-aged women in particular, without our moral decay being brought into play.

Anyway, enough of that! I know my habitual bottle of wine a day wasn't useful to my health or bank balance, nor did it particularly contribute to my sense of well being beyond the first or second glass.

I am doing DJ to get a realistic sense of what alcohol was bringing to my table, and it appears to be a hobby to prevent evening boredom! I haven't dared attempt an evening out with mates, I know I just wouldn't enjoy it as they enjoyed 2-3 glasses, and the evening got merrier (my mates are also 60+ and do not get publicity pissed or make fools of themselves, or start loudly sounding off!).

I don't want to never drink again. So I will attempt Damp Feb. I will attempt to limit my drinking to two nights a week, and half a bottle, tops, per chosen evening, plus the 6-8 evenings a year I catch up with my mates.

If I find I cannot do that, then I need to consider quitting, but, baby steps!

Agree with everything you say, @Fordian !

Good post @Fordian 👏

I too would never dare admit to my GP the true extent of my drinking.

DJ has really got me thinking - I don’t need to drink, and I can manage without alcohol (albeit it’s a struggle mentally). I think I might limit myself to drinking in social situations only, because if I do start drinking again at home I can see that could easily be a slippery slope for me. I’ve been known to drink socially in the afternoon, then go home and carry on. I must have drunk 1.5 or so bottles on those occasions, possibly more (that sounds scary to admit). But if I simply don’t have any wine in the house then I won’t be able to do that.

@Fordian loved reading your post and its honestly.

I feel quite similar to you. I don’t feel brilliant, or look any better. I weigh a bit less but I have been calorie counting and exercising which will the main reasons for that. I do think I am sleeping better overall, and I enjoy being hangover free and always in control.

I also struggle to believe the medical/ scientific doomsday scenarios. I think I said previously I have always had “normal”
liver function results but I am led to believe that at 20-30 units per week I am a very high risk drinker. My drinking risk score on the Try Dry app is 9/12. But I feel healthy, and I am healthy.

You might infer from my username, my ex-H is an alcoholic. He’s actually currently in a sober living house trying to find a way to live without booze after a 5th time in some sort of rehab. We split up about 10 years ago so I am not particularly invested in him, but I can see the harm it can do. Even he says his liver is expected to fully recover (though he could be telling me a load of BS about that, compulsive lying is his MO) and he had jaundice this time last year!. I see a gulf between him and I in terms of alcohol use. Yet I am a “very high risk drinker”??

But, I do want to trend downwards in my drinking as I approach perimenopause, so will aim to stick to my Damp Feb pledges. Have not found DJ too hard but I am looking forward to reintroducing some alcohol to my world as it gives me some benefits.