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Original poster

Do graduates tend to become friends with each other?

31 replies

Mfewtpay · 21/01/2025 14:10

Asking for your experiences when you were a graduate and/or your DC's experiences?

With my DS he has a few of his fellow grads on Instagram but that's it. They'll usually have lunch together or go out for a drink after work and have a laugh. DS does like everyone at work but they don't hang out at weekends.

OP posts:
BeaAndBen · 21/01/2025 14:12

If they weren’t friends when they were on the course together they won’t become friends just because they graduated.

ForZanyAquaViewer · 21/01/2025 14:13

I don’t really understand the question? Do you mean, do we still talk to our friends from uni? If so, then yes. I made some lifelong friends at university. There’s also a looser group of acquaintances who I see occasionally.

Thecomfortador · 21/01/2025 14:13

Twenty years on after university, I have a few uni mates on Facebook and interact occasionally - but other than that we went our separate ways. Initially a few of shared a house for a few months but it all drifted as we did different things.

DreamW3aver · 21/01/2025 14:14

When befriending a new person whether they are a graduate or not doesn't feature. Why would it?

Starryknightcloud · 21/01/2025 14:14

On a grad scheme? Yes loosely in the way you describe. Some will click longer term, Some won't like any mix of people.

PragmaticIsh · 21/01/2025 14:16

Do you mean do people from the same university tend to stay friends? Yes, sometimes but not always.

Or do you mean, do those who are graduates at work tend to become friends rather than with non-graduates? Not sure, everyone I've worked with since university has been a graduate.

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 21/01/2025 14:16

I'm a graduate and find that decades later, all my close friends are graduates too, from different universities and courses and times.
It could be a coincidence. I wonder what other people find if they count up. I have plenty of casual friends and acquaintances who are not graduates, but the closest ones are.

Original poster
Mfewtpay · 21/01/2025 14:17

I mean graduates in a company. Big mistake on my part for not clarifying.

As in do friendships form within the graduate cohort in a company

OP posts:
SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 21/01/2025 14:18

Mfewtpay · 21/01/2025 14:17

I mean graduates in a company. Big mistake on my part for not clarifying.

As in do friendships form within the graduate cohort in a company

Edited

Oh right! I wouldn't expect that particularly. When I've worked in a large company I've been friendly with all kinds of people in different grades. It's often the people you see most often at work that you get most friendly with.

HPandthelastwish · 21/01/2025 14:22

I think if they are on particular graduate scheme then friendships will naturally develop as they would if they worked in ay other group together.

I'm the only graduate at my place of work, it would be a pretty lonely place if I could only socialise with others with the same education level as me.

irregularegular · 21/01/2025 14:31

I joined an employer's graduate scheme with a cohort of 20, almost 30 years ago. A few months ago, 15 of us had dinner together. Quite amazing really, after all this time, and with busy people. The ones who didnt come were almost all out of the country. Some of them became very close friends at the time and still are. I didn't, for various reasons, but it's stil fun and interesting to meet up at an occasional get together.

irregularegular · 21/01/2025 14:33

However, my oldest friendship group is the group of graduate students that I knew when I did my master's degree. We are still close 30 years on. It helps that my DH was friends with them too - it was when we met. Plus a few of us stayed close to the university.

BarbaraHoward · 21/01/2025 14:45

Mfewtpay · 21/01/2025 14:17

I mean graduates in a company. Big mistake on my part for not clarifying.

As in do friendships form within the graduate cohort in a company

Edited

Same as any other job, the grad thing is pretty irrelevant. Some will get one well, some hate each other. Most will make some work friends, that rarely turn into friend friends. I wouldn't expect to see work friends at the weekend, no.

ExtraDisorganised · 21/01/2025 14:47

We did initially because we were all on a graduate induction scheme together and living in company owned shared houses. But there was only one other new graduate in my division in my year and we didn't get on that well so I mainly made friends with other people in my department, either older graduates or those in non-graduate roles. A lot of weekend socialising was still with friends from school / uni in those early years. It takes quite a long time IME for work colleagues to move from lunch/after work drinks to proper friendships, meet partners, do things at the weekend or whatever.

mateysmum · 21/01/2025 14:50

43 yrs on my best friend is from the grad scheme! Both our husbands also worked for the same company at the time and we met them on a company course.

PercyFone · 21/01/2025 14:55

My grad scheme cohort of 20 people led to two marriages!

Overthebow · 21/01/2025 14:58

Some do and some don’t, same as anything really. I made a couple of friends and went to work socials but I didn’t really want to hang out with them at the weekends as I had other, non work friends for that.

Tisthedamnseason · 21/01/2025 19:25

At my workplace they do. But we have quite a big September intake, they do exams for 3 years, go to college together, go on study leave etc. so they do often bond as a group

Iliketulips · 21/01/2025 19:31

DD works for a small business with with four who graduated over two years, including her. None of them mix socially or message. She did meet up with one chap there a few times for lunch and went out with him and his GF before the chap left.

She's always open to new friendships, but is very lucky to be back in her home town where she still has four good friends she's kept in touch with. She's kept in touch people from uni, her year abroad and old friends who've moved away and meets up with a couple of them every year.

Original poster
Mfewtpay · 22/01/2025 08:55

I actually met DH at work. But he was a year senior to me.

DS actually has a crush on a girl at work, and even though they are friendly and she is single he won't ask her out.

OP posts:
AlQuom · 22/01/2025 08:58

Mfewtpay · 22/01/2025 08:55

I actually met DH at work. But he was a year senior to me.

DS actually has a crush on a girl at work, and even though they are friendly and she is single he won't ask her out.

Well, that's his call. Or are you saying he won't ask her out even though or because she's part of his graduate intake social group?

Original poster
Mfewtpay · 22/01/2025 09:02

AlQuom · 22/01/2025 08:58

Well, that's his call. Or are you saying he won't ask her out even though or because she's part of his graduate intake social group?

Show quote history

He won't ask her out because his uni friends have advised him that's it's unwise to ask out work colleagues.

OP posts:
TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 22/01/2025 09:10

Blimey, let him live his life.

You married your husband who you met at work, so you think your son must ask out a girl he likes, and he must also socialise with his work colleagues.

In spite of the fact he has uni friends who he's happy to chat about this with?

He doesn't have to see things your way or take your advice. Be glad he's happy to chat, he might become less so if you pester him with advice. I didn't meet my husband in a rainy tent like my mum met my dad, yet somehow we struggle on.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 22/01/2025 09:11

Oh, and the crush will either a) fizzle out as they sometimes do, or b) turn into something without any formal "asking out" happening.

Ohnonotmeagain · 22/01/2025 09:11

Surely if he’s going for lunch and drinks after work then that is “friends”?

you seem to be defining friendship as seeing someone on a weekend? Why isn’t spending time together on a weekday?

in the working world meeting up on a weekend is more unusual. People will have girlfriends, wives, boyfriends, husbands, housework to do, jobs and chores. They’re adults with adult lives. Often they’ve moved out of student areas into the suburbs so geography makes it difficult to nip over for a coffee or some video games.