I really don’t want to reply to any Christmas messages

[tragedeigh]

Christmas was never my fave holiday and I stopped celebrating and have been spending the day on my own for over 10 years now

I don’t exchange gifts, I don’t send cards, I don’t decorate my house

I respect people who do of course

My family know this but every year I’m bombarded with endless Christmas messages, gifs, virtual cards, stickers, memes - it is so so annoying

I hate having a busy phone. I reduce my emails to absolutely essential. I’m part of very selected few whatsapp groups.
I know it is only 2 days of the year, since they start on the 24th but I feel violated. It is like they want to hammer their traditions on me regardless of what I want/think.

In the past I use to reply with a simple Merry Christmas but there is zero sentiment in it, I feel mechanic, fake and going against myself.

I think this year I will just ignore them all even if they think I’m being rude. I’m pretty present the whole year round but the one period I want to opt out because I don’t see the point in doing Christmas anything, they don’t respect.

Why is too much to accept that some people just don’t celebrate?
I don’t have any religious or cultural excuses and it feels like a burden having to go along other people’s beliefs just because they refuse to accept yours.

Rant over.

I don't think it is caring to force 'Christmas' on people who have made it clear they do not want to celebrate. I think in at least some instances people are trying to distract themselves from their own Christmas. Something along the lines of the drinker who tops up people's glasses when they don't want them topped up so they can feel better about their own drinking.

I've had Christmas cards from people wishing me a wonderful Christmas and a fabulous NY kind of thing when they knew that that wasn't possible. It's not that they didn't care or that they were wrong to send the card. It was that it was easier for them to send it than to acknowledge that I didn't want one, actually in general but certainly that year. It would have been better to send a plain piece of card with a message saying I know it's going to be tough this year. But that would have taken some thought and perhaps made them evaluate their own lives and, anyhow, blank cards don't come in packs of 20.

Any card I get now gets opened, I take a peak to make sure it is a greetings card, and then straight in the recycling. Same with birthdays. Presents get opened when I can face it. They usually make me cry. I didn't get any last year and just one card so that was pretty good.
I'd love to love getting cards and presents but I don't and I realise that might be hard for other people but it's hard for me too.

Why the fuss? Just ignore if you don't want to respond. How many messages do you get anyway? Surely it's a few, not hundreds. I get silly memes and stuff from some family /friends - I just ignore if I'm not interested.

That’s the thing to do. They will learn that you don’t tolerate what makes them happy if you don’t like it.

Feeling violated by good wishes from people who care about you is limiting if nothing else. I mean, what emotion will you feel if you are ever actually violated.

I get the odd message at Eid,I don't celebrate but I appreciate the sentiment and send something nice back. It's nice to be nice and all that.

I was going to say something similar about Diwali. I think it's lovely that people with different beliefs and cultures would include me in their celebrations - it's a great example of what an inclusive society does.

OP, I don't know what has happened for you to despise Christmas so much but I'm assuming it's something really traumatic, and for that you have my full sympathy, but to be so angry and vitriolic about it doesn't sound healthy at all.

If you ignore Christmas, I'd ignore any Christmas messages

I'd then send HNY messages on the 1 Jan

Turn your phone off, block people for the day or mute notifications?

You have options.

OP doesn't have to if she doesn't celebrate and the day means nothing to her.

But you can ignore them and not reply once the day is over.

So are you asking for our permission to ignore these people, do you want a pat on the back, you have decided you are right so what do you want us to say? Congratulations? Well done? What!?

I get messages about all sorts of celebrations throughout the year as I work in a very multicultural environment. They arrive on normal days for me but they don’t bother me at all as they are well meaning and nice. Most of them are generic messages sent to all contacts. I heart emoji the more personal ones.

If you don’t care about Christmas, I can’t see why this would bother you.

Archive the group for a few days. You won’t get messages unless you go back into archive.

Are you on social media? If yes, just post a PSA saying you will not be responding to any Christmas-based messages.
Would you wish someone a happy birthday if they didn't celebrate, or go to a baby-shower even if you thought they were tacky? I ask because sometimes, we all have to just do stuff to make other people a little happier.