I really don’t want to reply to any Christmas messages

[tragedeigh]

Christmas was never my fave holiday and I stopped celebrating and have been spending the day on my own for over 10 years now

I don’t exchange gifts, I don’t send cards, I don’t decorate my house

I respect people who do of course

My family know this but every year I’m bombarded with endless Christmas messages, gifs, virtual cards, stickers, memes - it is so so annoying

I hate having a busy phone. I reduce my emails to absolutely essential. I’m part of very selected few whatsapp groups.
I know it is only 2 days of the year, since they start on the 24th but I feel violated. It is like they want to hammer their traditions on me regardless of what I want/think.

In the past I use to reply with a simple Merry Christmas but there is zero sentiment in it, I feel mechanic, fake and going against myself.

I think this year I will just ignore them all even if they think I’m being rude. I’m pretty present the whole year round but the one period I want to opt out because I don’t see the point in doing Christmas anything, they don’t respect.

Why is too much to accept that some people just don’t celebrate?
I don’t have any religious or cultural excuses and it feels like a burden having to go along other people’s beliefs just because they refuse to accept yours.

Rant over.

thank you for your armchair psychology analises and counselling

that is the kind of intolerance I’m talking about and how you and the majority are unable to understand a different perspective

wouldn’t be better to trust that someone like me - as an grown adult - would seek celebration if I changed without having to be soft coerced every year just because other people’s beliefs and rightousness

it is exhausting

I’m out as I can see no discussion can be productive when there are two opposing sides on this topic

Why not think about it another way, and be grateful that so many people care about you and are thinking about you. You don’t have to acknowledge over Christmas, but how about afterwards a Happy New Year message?

@GherkOut I am similar to the OP and wish I were able to spend the day at home, alone and doing as I please. It would make me incredibly happy.

I appreciate you think you’re being kind but to those of us who really don’t enjoy Christmas in the traditional way, comments such as yours add to the pressure and annoyance the OP mentions. People don’t have to have trauma or a difficult past to not enjoy Christmas.

odd messaged at Eid x bombarding at Christmas

See the difference??

I like NY so I have zero problems with that

NY does not = Chritmas imo

NY makes sense to me

Just tell everyone to fuck off OP, that should stop the messages.

I think you can safely just ignore them. Then it might well start to slowly tail off. People don't mean any harm, they probably just don't feel comfortable leaving you out. If they get nothing back they might realise that you are serious.

I did this with Christmas cards. I haven't sent any for many years. The first year that I didn't we still got a lot of them but in subsequent years it was ever diminishing. Now it is virtually none at all. We do still celebrate Christmas, but have managed to knock that particular chore on the head by just not engaging with it.

It's not worth letting it get to you. Your actions (or lack of) will speak louder than words.

You live in England, it doesn't matter what religion you are. It's a cultural & tradional pagan celebration. Christians hooked their wagon to it because it was so popular.

you don't have to enjoy the various traditions, food or gift giving. You don't have to 'celebrate it' as such, but it's pretty miserable to resent people wishing you merry Christmas & return the sentiment. It's just wishing you well & a good next year, they're not asking you to join a cult, or even to join in, just good health & happiness.

i have no faith, but I think it's nice when someone wishes me well or good fortune during one of their celebrations.

the exception I'd make is if someone is bereaved around Christmas or has some other tragedy triggered by Christmas, then I wouldn't wish them merry Christmas or Happy New Year, because it's just not going to be.

One of my good friends, lost her Best Friend (since she was 5) in the Boxing Day Tsunami, I'm very careful choosing her card & what I write. 20 years later it's still difficult for her.

if you were my friend and asked not to wish you a MC or send a card gift/whatever, I wouldn't, but I'd feel bad leaving you out.

Just ignore the messages. Or put the chats on mute for two days. Job done. I agree the stickers and gifs are daft.

But ‘violated’ by them? Bit OTT.

Nicer than them not giving a shit

I don't think you have to reply, but I don't agree with your stance that you don't celebrate therefore shouldn't have to tolerate other people's good cheer messages. There is a particular day which causes them to think of loved ones and reach out to them with a Merry Christmas. Ok, it's a bit tiresome to get messages you didn't want, but it's a small price to pay for having people who care enough about you to include you in their thoughts.

You don't mind at NYE so it comes across as a bit intolerant of anything that isn't on your terms. Turn your phone off and have a peaceful Christmas day, then be grateful to have some messages when you turn it back on the next day.

Having said that I do get it as I find the NY messages a bit meaningless and irritating. But I give myself a shake and count myself lucky to have people who even think to message me.

Sorry OP!

I would simply wish them a merry Christmas back and leave it at that.

This is horribly patronising. It's very disrespectful to make the assumption that not liking Christmas relates to something in the past. Some people are introverts who don't like palaver. Some of us hate parties and forced celebrations, not because of any past trauma, but because it's who we are. My own choice not to celebrate Christmas makes me very happy, thank you. I have no need of tinsel or mulled wine or gifts.

See
NY make sense as feels like a new start and a reset -

25/12 is just a random day

To be honest if people (including immediate family) cannot be bothered to acknowledge & wish me happy birthday I won’t respond to a happy Christmas from them because ‘it’s tradition’ & makes them look like they are ‘doing the right thing’

my phone will probably be in flight mode tomorrow. I just matching their normal minimal effort.

Ignore them entirely if you want to. That's fine. If they go on to ignore you entirely, don't complain. You don't have to celebrate Christmas, or anything else, to be a decent person. I can still be courteous about things even if they don't interest me.

Thing is Christmas Day is Christmas Day.

Just because you don't celebrate it in the traditional sense doesn't mean the day itself doesn't exist.

Same with food Friday, Easter Sunday, bank holidays etc.

As long as no one is trying to force their idea of how you should spend the day on you I don't see why acknowledging the day and wishing you a good one is such an issue.

If it was one simple Merry Christmas whatver message per person than it would be tolerable I guess although I dont know why I should be more merry on the 25/12 than any other day of the year

But what I’m talking about is the bombarding of multiple messages about what they think this date represents, how they think people should magically feel and the whole animated or non animated illustrations of all kinds - from religious to ‘fun’ and everything in between that people keep sending over and over again

It is like always when they receive one new thing they have to share around god knows why

TBF if they gave a shit about the OP they'd respect her wishes...it's clear that by ignoring what she wants and just doing what they want, they, in fact, don't give a shit.

Put your phone on Do not Disturb for a couple of days OP and enjoy the peace and quiet.

On WhatsApp you could change your status to 'back online in the new year', I guess on email you could set an auto response too.

I can't be arsed with New Year either though. That's just another day as well. In what way is it a new start/reset?

Just ignore them. Mute/archive all the offenders on WhatsApp or whatever other medium they use to harass you. I don't know why you can't just do that? Or deleted WhatsApp completely until New Year,

OP, just ignore them! Is that an option? If you keep doing that they’ll soon get the hint.

next time you message them don’t mention their Christmas meme or whatever at all.

Just say "thanks, all the best for 2025". You don't even have to wish them a merry Xmas back.

Personally I don't think it's a big deal. You might not celebrate but they do.

Their messages are not forcing you to celebrate. And mute them if they are annoying.