Boss punched the table & shouted at me.

[Walkingwithdinosaurs]

Boss has a favourite employee, said employee (let’s call her Pat) was extremely rude to me so I told her not to speak to me like that. The whole office heard it and of course spoke about it to each other and to me.

Pat then went to the boss (owner) and told what happened and said that I was gossiping about her and making her look bad and that I had hurt her feelings.

It’s all very immature and I’ve never had this kind of behaviour in a work place before. Anyway, boss calls me into the office and goes crazy at me. How dare I upset Pat, he shouted so loudly that everyone in the office heard every word he said to me. He punched the table, wouldn’t let me speak or stand up for myself or explain what actually happened. This lasted about 10 minutes until I walked outside and gathered my thoughts.

Needless to say, I was extremely upset and embarrassed. I sat at my desk and cried.

I honestly don’t know what to do. We don’t have HR because it’s only 4 staff + the boss.

I’ve only been there 2 years and don’t want to leave because I love my job. Any advice much appreciated as I can’t even sleep replaying this back over and over.

This.

I would send the letter that @weirdoboelady provided but add something about Pat revelling in it and how you feel since it happened to explain the gap between incident and response.

Self certify for a week and see the GP about being signed off for longer with workplace stress and use the time to seek proper advice and / or look for a new job.

Not everyone gets full pay whilst on sick leave.

The guy has form - OP says he has shouted at everyone. There is no “definitely shagging/shagged Pat” here - he likes to be a bully and will use any excuse.

I'd ruin him for that.

Very good.
We used to have a lodger, yes, a lodger with similar attitude in the distant past.
Needles to say, it ended up with the Police coming and bastard leaving our house.
How do these men think they can get away with such behaviour?
I would happily stick his "short fuse" up his arse.
And he was called very similar to "Frank".
😉

No sick pay and honestly he’s so sneaky I’d probably not get paid ssp.

You’re all right he will never change. Staff turnover is very high, apart from Pat no one has been there longer than 2.5 years. One post we can’t fill because Pat trains them and no one can stand her. They usually last a few weeks and walk. Boss thinks it’s because you “just can’t get the staff these days” “no one wants to work” “there all on benefits” etc etc

I will need to update my CV and look for something in the next city over to find something like my current role.

Have you got Stockholm Syndrome? I couldn't work for someone who was yes completely unhinged, misogynist and a narcissist! Why in hell's name would you work making money for someone like that?

I had a boss do this too. Same situation, small company, no HR. I walked out on the spot. It did mean doing on benefits for a few months which I needed to recover in all honestly. Then found a job I actually love. Honestly, leave.

It is very rare that I would ever advise someone to turn around to their employer and tell them to stick their job where the sun doesn't shine. In this case, you should, providing you can pay bills and survive.

It's all very well bringing a claim for constructive dismissal but even if it gets to Tribunal when the chips are down, yiur colleagues are likely to support the employer rather than you and Pat will be the star witness. The judgement will also be a matter of public record and all a future employer will have to do to find it is to Google your name, which they do nowadays.

In your shoes, I'd do cleaning, take in ironing, wait at tables, work in a supermarket to get by.

He's an arsehole. You are worth more.

Apologies if this has already been said, but your boss is accusing everybody but Pat of lying. I think it’s worth pointing this out and asking what he’s going to do about that

Is something like this possible.
Tell him you are going to ACAS and it will become public unless he agrees to pay you double the notice period and you leave immediately.

how horrible.

can you live off savings for a bit? How long is your notice period?

Get a new job op its not wirth being there working with office pet and a bunch of wankers.
If it was me i wouldn't have been able to hold my temper with him.

I would probably just say, it isn’t easy at all to take someone to tribunal and often it is your word against theirs and most employees won’t sell out their employer - and I’m sure Pat will say he’s wonderful. Also, it can be expensive, time consuming and stressful.

I’m not saying it’s right, but I think you should spend your energy on protecting yourself, getting some advise (ACAS is free) and lining up to leave.

Tell him to stick his job up his arse. Pat would be getting a serious word from me as well.

I had a similar ish situation and 'Pat' and the boss were very likely having an affair. Left and don't regret it. Maybe you can get legal advice about your employment rights OP

@Nothatgingerpirate excellent use of 'needles to say'... 👏🏼

God the atmosphere must be awful!!!

I worked with a Pat once. I was very young and attractive at the time and the boss used to flirt with me it was grim. Turned out "Pat" and the boss were having an affair. She hated the unwanted attention he gave me and was a first class cunt to me day in and day out. After one particularly awful day I went home and told my Dad and he just said "you're not going back". I wrote to them to tell them why I had left and never heard another thing.

55 year old me would now take them to the bloody cleaners. Please seek some advice. You don't have to put up with this. I agree the letter suggested by a PP is an excellent idea. Good luck OP, I know how shit it is.

I'd submit a firmsl greuvance against both of them and go off sick, whilst looking for another job. I'd also contact ACAS and ask if something like this might be a constructive dismissal claim.

"The judgement will also be a matter of public record and all a future employer will have to do to find it is to Google your name, which they do nowadays."

What about google's right to be forgotten? That would make it harder to find with a simple google.

You can't shout at employees either...

So many things we can't do but unless it will end up with you going to jail, what's the worst that can happen, nowt.

It is unlikely that OP can “take her boss to the cleaners” - tribunal cases take a long time to come to court - years, and need legal fees and witnesses - and this was one incident as far as OP is concerned, so not the strongest case.

And she has already said she doesn’t get sick pay.

It’s inadmissible in a tribunal, I think, so it wouldn’t do OP much good.

She could (and should) write down this and any other incident in detail as soon as they happen.