Rejected from dream job

[RolyPolyOll]

Any tips for getting over this? The most ideal job came up, I genuinely thought I would be a good candidate as I have so much experience (and have actually worked at that company on a project before!) and had an interview earlier this week which I stupidly thought went really well. I answered the questions well, we had great back and forth and I naively thought I did a good job. I then stupidly went down the path of imagining I worked there, thinking of how much fun the job would be and essentially daydreamt I had the role.

Well, back to reality, and I got rejected (so not through to the final round). And I am in bits. I am so so so so upset. I feel deflated. I really want to find a new job and this has knocked my confidence. I should be enjoying the festive period but instead I’m sitting crying! Mentally it took a lot for me to apply (having been on mat leave and having had my DCs) and now I just feel sad.

This gives me hope!

Also I am so deluded I am sitting here thinking maybe the system accidentally rejected me 😂

They were a bit chaotic, shall we say.

Honestly OP if they are the sort of organisation that can’t even be arsed to give feedback to people they interviewed, I’m not sure they are in fact that great!

This makes me feel a LOT better. I assumed perhaps most Companies just didn’t give it. My current one (huge organisation) gives feedback to every candidate that asks (provided they get to interview stage) so thought maybe that was a rarity!

I've job hunted a lot over the past few years for various situations so been in this situation many times. It sucks, but I find the pain is quite fleeting and once I've come to terms, I usually begin to feel OK again quite quickly. It's just assimilating the new reality which is different to what you imagined it would be but hopefully it'll blow over quickly if you give your brain the chance to process it. That's what I always find anyway.

That’s a real shame that you were ignored OP.

I would accept a no-reply email from a CV submission absolutely. But for an interview? That I had took time out of day to attend, prepped for, anticipated? I would definitely expect some form of feedback. It is what I mandate in my organisation.

This is reassuring. Tbh I only got the rejection 3h ago so it’s quite raw!

We always offer to give feedback to interview candidates. I hope any decent organisation would

That’s so true. And organised childcare for to prep for and for the interview itself. God I feel like a mug for making so much effort to get rejected.

Maybe this shows it isn’t my dream place!

Don’t beat yourself up. Hindsight is a wonderful thing!

It’s so difficult to interview, especially coming back to work after mat leave. I remember my first after DS was born - I was a bag of nerves. You did amazing to put yourself out there and take a big step. They can’t take that from you.

Interviews are a two-way street and they have shown their hand by not replying to your email. You can do better OP.

That sucks 😞 I believe everything happens for a reason so I'd be disappointed but tell myself that it wasn't meant to be for whatever reason. Maybe it was a toxic workplace, maybe something even more exciting is waiting on the new year. Wishing you all the best

I'm in the same boat. I applied for my dream job, haven't heard back, actually heard from the recruiter that they're still deciding, but heard through the grapevine someone has already been chosen (not me), and I'm still moping two months later.

I feel for you! I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone. It genuinely feels like everything from now on will be settling on something below your potential, even if it is a step up from where you are now!

The important thing to remember is that interviews aren’t just about you, they’re about the other candidates. You can be an absolutely fantastic candidate and there’ll be someone who is a bit better fit because of XYZ. You have absolutely no control over that and it’s not a personal failing.

Allow yourself to feel the upset, but please remember that you were probably great. They just liked a few other people better - and, even of them, all but one of them will be similarly disappointed.

Thank you. I just wish I knew why!! Like what particular answer or experience made them reject me.

Another believer in things happen for a reason here too. Try not to beat yourself up. At my company there's usually somebody internal already earmarked for the role and the business is just going through the motions. You could do everything 100% right but the job is already going to someone else

That’s so mean of them. You should’ve want work for them!

Perhaps! They did say in the interview that those id be managing has been there a long time so perhaps one of those went for a promotion?

Exactly this.

I'm currently recruiting for my company across multiple countries and at multiple grades. I spend a lot of time rejecting people, at least two per day this week. Very few people make it through to an offer.

We get lots of good candidates but that means we can be picky. The competition is pretty intense and you can have what you think is a great interview but still be rejected. Sometimes it's because we have better / more suitable candidates, sometimes it's because you're not a fit for our culture / clients / strategic direction, sometimes it's because you say something in your interview which may well be valid or a good answer but is not actually what we we're looking for. You can interview well but that doesn't mean you're the best / right candidate. In my own experience as a candidate, it's often the interviews that I think went badly that I've actually been most successful in. It can be very hard to judge.

All you can do is dust yourself off and keep trying.

Thank you everyone ❤️

I am also reminding muself (thanks to everyone reminding me on this thread) that maybe it wasn’t the dream role as the hiring manager ignored my email before I applied asking for a brief chat about the role, and then a generic no reply email post interview. I wouldn’t have looked at things that way if it weren’t for this thread!

What’s meant for you won’t pass you by.

Wow. A beautiful quote ❤️

It could have gone to an internal candidate. I know a job I want is coming up at my work. I also know of two other internal candidates that want it. All 3 of us would be good for the job in different ways. They are still going to advertise it externally. None of us have done this specific job before, so it could well go to an external candidate who has the job title in their resume but doesn’t have the experience we have with the system and department.

I think I am mentally prepared that I won’t get the job, but even so I expect I will be disappointed if it doesn’t happen. I expect the other 2 internal candidates will feel the same. I would be surprised if none of us leave in the 12 months after the job is advertised because of the feeling of disappointment and not being valued.

its human nature to want something and feel disappointed if we don’t get it. It doesn’t mean you can’t do the job or wouldn’t be great at the job. It just means that for whatever reason, you didn’t get this job. There will be others. Consider this a practice application, and use it to improve your chances next time. Good luck!