What is it that makes y6 girls cool?

[LemonLimeFresca]

At state school primary carol service today and noticed an air of cool around some of the kids (not mine)
How do they get it?
And so young
This is my 3rd time observing and by y6 you already know who those kids are
Is it cool parents?
I can't work it out

This.

And parents who pander to the latest cool trends.

Honest to god, the cool girls in my son's class are insufferably awful.

I help out with the class and the cool girls, even the clever ones, are just horrible children.

They value stuff and image over being nice to each other. And it shows.

It's awful to see.

I think it's self confidence and putting yourself out there, being brave, risk taking, and being resilient when you do something wrong, not taking yourself too seriously.

My DD defines things differently. She says there aren't any cool kids, but she talks about the popular girls, those are the ones who are a little too mature for their age, skin care, boyfriends, fashion, brands etc. She says everyone likes them because they have to, but she sees their friendship drama, boyfriend angst and doesn't think they're cool. Entertaining to watch, but not aspirational!

Then without meaning to offend you- I don’t think your daughter is the kind of cool most people are thinking of.
She sounds lovely but not giving cool year 6 vibes.

I’m getting a very judgmental air off of this thread…I think tarnishing all girls who have “a cool factor” as a bully etc is very mean spirited. My dd couldn’t be further from a bully, nor does she have a boyfriend 🙄

It's the parents who indulge their kids wants and whims and I've found it's noticeable from as young as year 1. They're also almost always NT too.

As the mum of a ND child I've found because my child isn't liked by their peers or teaching staff the parents don't talk to me which then feeds into the cycle because there's no play date arranging going on to help improve the situation. So yes. It always stems from the parents.

I think the kind of cool most people on here are talking about maybe doesn’t exist in my dds class of 9 kids…😅 but she is delightful and Waaaaay cooler than I ever was at her age 🤣🤣

Your daughter is cool in your opinion… we have no idea if she’s the sort of girl the people on this thread are talking about, or whether anyone else would consider her a ‘cool girl’, so there’s no need to take it personally! We haven’t met your daughter 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m just pushing against the generalisations on this thread is all…

Perhaps then your DD fits into more my idea of cool ie self confidence and resilience

And not my daughter's idea of popular (and in her opinion, uncool) hair, makeup, boyfriend, angst, brands

Your DD sounds lovely

Probably not no 🤣 but yeah I think she’s cool

Yeah I think maybe that’s it I suppose, although she does love her Nike pros, comfiest leggings for training apparently 🤣

Yes, but my point is that people on here may not consider your daughter to be a ‘cool girl’ at all, so she wouldn’t be the sort of person they’re talking about. Therefore no need to take offence! As I said above, I think my daughter is the coolest person I know but I also know that she’s absolutely not what others consider to be a ‘cool girl’.

I will consider her cool in my books 🙌😌

The ‘cool girls’ are the same as they always were - those who are able to access something others can’t and use it, consciously or unconsciously, as leverage over others. FWIW the cool girls in DDs class are the ones who have access to social media, do tiktok dances, care about skincare/hair/makeup and are getting into boys. DD thinks they are boring because they don’t do anything 🤣 but she’s finding it harder to fit in now

Excellent! I think the same about mine 😊

Yours sounds wonderful and very cool in my opinion too 🙌

My daughter had her primary 7 disco tonight as it's the last Christmas at primary they get a proper big disco at night. I was doing her make up and hair and she's on video call with her 2 friends whilst they're doing theirs. When we got there i was shocked at the clique like groups. My daughters very pretty (not being biased) and I noticed a lot of the girls were straight over to her trying ti sway her to their 'group' but she wasn't interested she is happy with her friends who are all very different and not considered cool. She's quite chatty to everyone but doesn't like to follow crowds. Her teacher grabbed me after and told me my DD had actually went over to a boy in her year who has some additional needs and is often left out he was sat alone and she grabbed his hand and got him up dancing with her friends and he had a fantastic night. She absolutely hates kids being left out that's been her before and she hated it and hates seeing it. She would rather have no friends and make sure those who are a bit lonelier have her as a friend. She doesn't have any older siblings and I agree I think the 'cool' kids do tend to have older siblings in high school which helps them xxx

Interesting thread!

I noticed at my daughters primary leaving ceremony earlier this year that some of the girls do give off a cooler vibe but it wasn’t about Nike pros and make up which none of them had on at the time. I think it just had to be confidence in this case?

I never thought the 'cool girls' were cool when I was at school. They were insufferable sheep.

The girls I thought were actually cool were the ones who didn't need to follow the trends and were happy in themselves.

'Cool girls' and cool girls are different things - we all know who the former are - the latter is a subjective thing.

Both can be described as cool.

It depends entirely on how you perceive cool. Where I live White Fox hoodies are seen as outdated and chavvy now. Most of the 'cooler' girls tend to have a more alternative style and play an instrument or are good at singing. The sporty girl as seen as cool too.

Can I come lol?

I think ts probablly the rich kids

At DD's prep school, the cool Y6 girls are the sporty ones. They also tend to be slightly more academic and are often a little more confident (possibly because of the above).

The level of cool seems to follow the pattern of the richer parents for the girls. It's all skin care stuff and being able to have fancy sleep over parties.

But not for the boys. For the boys, the 'cool gang' are all into football and age inappropriate games / internet access.

Are we talking about the popular girls? The ones in DDs year are the sporty ones with older siblings and phones.
When I think 'cool', I tend to think of the confident/ alternative kids who wouldn't be seen in anything mainstream like Nike Pro, but have a more vintage style