Convince me that a 2 year age gap is good?

[flyingbeet]

I have a 5 month old and hubby and I were already planning the next 😂. He said he would like a 2 year age gap and I said 3 years may be better because we get more one on one time with each baby. But I also want them to be close in age so they can play together. What do you think the ideal age gap is?

I had 2 years 3 months gap between my daughter and son and it was really hard work. Maybe a three year gap would be a bit easier, depends how much patience you have!!

19 months between my DD and DS2. Was hard initially as also has DS1 who is 3 years older. They're 9 and 8 now and the best of friends. They have all the same interests, play the same games, watch the same tv and movies, shared friends etc etc, it's brilliant.

We have a 5.5 year age gap because we had secondary infertility but it's the most beautiful relationship. One of my biggest worries/concerns during infertility was age gaps but what we have, to me, is perfect. My daughter is amazing with her baby brother and she's old enough to entertain herself if my husband and I need to deal with the baby. My 6 year old daughter plays with her baby brother all the time! It's not what we planned but now that we have it, I'm actually really confused as to why our society is so focused on 2/3 year ages gaps?!? Watching my friends who have kids 2 years apart... it's a lot of chaos 😂

I really don't think you can plan it like that.

You can really just go for it when you feel ready.

People saying "a levels and GCSE's at the same time", "at uni at the same time" etc.....life just doesn't work like that and I'm always somewhat in awe of the people who seem to have blind faith that their lives will pan out just as they plan it.

Many kids don't go to uni, and that's ok. Many kids have SEN, or A levels just aren't much of a consideration for other reasons. Your kid might be off travelling the world as a pro footballer at 17. You might end up having twins.

There's just too many variables when you try and look too far ahead.

As you'll see from the answers here, many posters think they have the ideal age gap - and it's because that's their family and it's what they know and it's their life and they love it. But as at least one pp conceded, if they had another age gap they'd have found a positive in that too.

(For what it's worth, mine have just under 3 years between them. It's longer than I would have liked, for various reasons, but 🤷‍♀️ I just don't know how a smaller gap would have worked out and I'm happy with what I have).

20 months here. I think two years is best. My younger sister is three years below me and it was big enough a gap that we weren't into the same things or same stage.
However beware siblings don't always play together and may not get on at all.

My 2 eldest are 22 months apart. They were in consecutive years .Perfect for me , no jealousy, eldest genuinely brought up her little brother.
They are now 31 and 29 ,youngest now in Oz and they are in touch regularly.
My 3rd child is 25 and adores his older siblings!