Does every health care professional breastfeed?

[Iammeltin]

Since the birth of my child and the way they push “breast is best” and my health visitor actually telling me she can’t promote formula even if breastfeeding isn’t working, not caring about the mothers mental health in the process.

Do all midwives/health visitors/doctors breast feed then? None of them use formula?

I am a GP. I have never been told by anyone, either at medical school or during GP training or when qualified, not to discuss formula feeding. I will happily talk at length if a woman wants to. I do however find it it's important to get a sense of which way she's leaning before opening my mouth and inadvertently offending or causing upset, as it's so easy to do and I strongly feel all mothers should be supported to do what's right for them in their individual circumstances.

Personally, I was utterly desperate to BF. Obviously I know lots of doctors, many friends are doctors, even my sister and 2 cousins, and it is absolutely the norm in my social circle. The talk on my doctor mums support groups and with friends is heavily BF related. I felt I would be a total hypocrite to recommend BF to patients yet not succeed myself. I felt a huge sense of social pressure to be able to chat about nursing bras/whether baby takes a bottle/expressing at work etc. Consequently when I struggled with my eldest, instead of resorting to FF at 4 weeks once it was obvious nursing had failed, I chose to exclusively pump. I continued for 9.5 long hard months of pumping 4-8 times a day, washing multiple parts, never being more than 4 hours between pumps. It was madness, looking back, but I felt I could hold my head up amongst colleagues because I was still giving my baby breast milk. Totally stupid really, especially as nobody ever said anything overt to me about not nursing.

I'm a midwife with a 2 year old. Didn't want to breastfeed due to feeling very uncomfortable touching my own breasts/finding monthly self examinations difficult etc.

Made it very clear to family that I would formula feed, bought the bottles and the kits, bought the little chuck away bottles to the hospital.

Baby popped out and my mum took one look at him and said 'ah, he's hungry' and whacked him on my boob. Still breastfeeding him every now and again but desperately trying to stop before baby number 2 arrives in Jan.

I'm in the 'fed is best' camp. Literally couldn't care less what people do as long as they're happy and baby is well, and I make it super clear to women that they are 'allowed' to find it hard (cos it is!) and they're 'allowed' to change their minds.

In my experience, midwives were very keen to promote bottles of formula. I had just delivered my second baby, and was sitting up most of the night as he fed. A passing midwife said "oh nobody can mange to breastfeed second babies." I asked why. She said something about me being too busy with the toddler to get around to it. 😵‍💫From a trained medical professional, specialising in the care of mothers and infants. Fortunately I was old enough and experienced enough with breastfeeding to ignore her nonsense. With hindsight, I wish I had reported her.

I'm a doctor and don't know of any rules banning me from talking about formula. Yes, we have to follow guidance based on research and very broadly this usually means that breastfeeding is recommended as the first option (not in all cases of course!) But I have had many conversations with Mothers about how formula or mixed feeding is entirely acceptable if they are struggling or just feel that that would be best for them and baby. I wouldn't usually recommend a specific formula, unless needing a necessary prescription one, purely because I do not feel knowledgeable/trained in each one.

For what it's worth, as health care professionals, we're also not immune to the pressures of "breast in best." I struggled on, completely miserable for four months trying to breastfeed my son because I felt so much pressure to give "the best." I'm sure it's the main cause of my PND and difficulties bonding in the first year. I would never want to cause anyone else to go through the same experience. Incidentally, it was only when I broke down crying in front of a lovely GP who told me "you don't have to breastfeed you know" that I finally gave myself the permission to stop trying.

Breast is best if you can do it. If your supply doesn't improve, and you have a screaming, hungry baby, who settles after the first formula feed, then do what's best for both of you.

Yes that midwife sounds odd... nearly all the mums I know found it easier to bf their second, not harder.

If mums are all too busy with their toddlers to breastfeed, how do they sort out bottles?! Takes way longer to wash, sterlise, measure out, warm/cool a bottle. Do all second siblings starve?! It doesn't make any sense

Am highly educated but 100% decided to use formula from day one - the sole reason was because I wanted to . Everyone knows about breastfeeding - you hear nothing else as soon as you’re pregnant. Midwives and health care staff pressured me to try breastfeeding. Thankfully, DH, a doctor stepped in and told them that my decision was final !
Health care staff need to start listening that the parents decision is correct not the NHS or hospitals.

I also had this experience with all HV and most midwives to be honest, the slightest whiff of any issues with weight or baby not “sleeping well” (?) were met with instructions to top up/offer formula despite me saying I was happy breastfeeding and baby was doing fine. Most HV and midwives are absolutely obsessed with weight and making babies sleep through even though evidence suggests frequent waking to BF is protective against SIDS. My latest HV was actually shocked when I said I wasn’t fussed about weighing DC3 at her recent 9 month check even though she’s in 12-18m clothes and I’d had her weighed about 6 weeks previously at the GPs and she was on the 91st centile.

Your health visitor is wrong she totally can give advice on formula feeding she can't recommend a specific formula brand but she can advice on how to make formula safely and how to mix feed if that's what you want to do.

I tried so hard to BF my first baby. I had to have IVF to have him in the first place. Then I very nearly died and almost lost him during childbirth due to medical negligence. He was several weeks premature and we both had to stay in hospital on antibiotics due to infection. In hindsight I was left totally traumatised by what had happened. I so desperately wanted to BF him and I tried so so hard but I couldn’t get him too. He had a tongue tie which a specially trained midwife cut but I could never get him to breastfeed beyond a few sucks of the boob. After weeks and weeks of round the clock pumping my milk I finally gave myself a break and formula fed him.

I was made to feel like total failure by various health professionals for not BF my son. I remember going to a baby group with a health visitor who bestowed the virtues of BF on us (which I was already fully aware of), looking at me formula feeding my son with a look of judgement on her face. She had no idea the tears I had over not being able to BF my son. Not all women can BF and very often there are valid reasons why they can’t. I think women who don’t BF are often unfairly labelled as lazy sub-standard mothers and it really pisses me off to be quite honest.

Absolutely this.

In my experience, women are always being told to "top up"with formula. I do think sometimes trying to encourage, or even suggest breastfeeding is seen as pushy. But considering the tiny %age of women who bf the pushing obviously isn't having much effect....

Because we are adults and perfectly capable of deciding that we want to use formula rather than breastfeeding.

NICU nurse here. I didn't breastfeed any of my premature children (3 boys)

I'm quite the advocate in work for mums who don't wish to breastfeed. It's not for everyone

A fed baby is best. If you need to introduce formula. Then do so

No idea, my midwife asked me my chosen feeding method and I sad FF so that was what thry arranged at the hospital for me

Of course not

They all choose cesareans though

@Parker231 "Because we are adults and perfectly capable of deciding that we want to use formula rather than breastfeeding"

Of course. However, I know in RL and have seen on here plenty of women who wanted to BF and ended up FF when perhaps a
little support and encouragement might have got them over a difficult bit. I haven't seen any that wanted to FF and ended up switching for the same reasons. Informed is best.

Same as anything. Why does toilet roll need promoting, who isn't buying it?

There needs to be more support and information on bottle feeding - the majority are doing it. I’d never made up a bottle, given a bottle, sterilised bottles - you get told to read the tin - not very helpful or supportive to new parents who are worried about doing something wrong.

@Parker231 "There needs to be more support and information on bottle feeding - the majority are doing it. I’d never made up a bottle, given a bottle, sterilised bottles - you get told to read the tin - not very helpful or supportive to new parents who are worried about doing something wrong"

I genuinely don't understand this. Obviously new parents need support and encouragement. But I don't understand why they need specific support for feeding in the way that those who choose BF do.

Because the message changes, technology is now in this space. So yes it would be helpful to have a session about these things.

Actually statistically women who BF have better mental health than those that FF if that is defined by rates of post natal depression. Of course correlation isn't causation....

I don't know any HCPs who didn't give breast feeding a good go, most got to 3 or 6 months many fed for between 1 &2 years, that is heped by long paid leave for maternity in the NHS

Of course there needs to be specific support on bottle feeding - if you’ve never done it before, help and support is needed.

I think that might be true for obstetricians. Amongst the peadiatricians I know aiming for a vaginal birth is the norm, there are many benefit for infant health and actually I think a straightforward vaginal birth is better for the mother too.