Dd has been cheating with homework

[Anotherdayanotherbattle]

Dd has been struggling mentally. And also with school and homework. It got to the point she was getting really upset, frustrated etc. Mentally she's touched on that she wants to self harm but has not actually done it.

I contacted the school who have put counselling in place for her which starts next week.

I had also mentioned that dd is struggling academically. So they referred to senco . They are looking at possible dyslexia.
And also doing a referral for asd.

Also this evening the school rang me about home work time table . They said they could give dd a home work time table more suited to her. On the time table it says travel home x time... home work x time for 2 hours then it says down time. Then bedtime. I suggested to simplify it. Ie just say home work 2 hrs . And leave it at that. School then said to me the home work should not take 2 hours it's just a guide .

When I got of the phone I asked dd how long does your homework take she said 40 mins because I cheat.

So her homework is not going to reflect that she's struggling.

With the maths if you don't get such a percentage right it's classed as not complete and they get a detention. So I think dd has been cheating to avoid it.

I said to dd we need to be honest about what she's been doing because they don't know her true level. Ir do they via school lessons? Dd has begged me not to say anything. But im not sure that's a good idea . I don't think she's dine it for the sake of cheating but to cover up het struggle. I don't want to get het into trouble. But also she can't keep doing it.

Dd is 14 in year 10.

DD2 is also 14 and hates Sparks maths. We also had the 100% or get a detention. The homework was meant to take 40 minutes, but would end in tears every time.

i have advocated for DD, she won’t go to homework club as “that’s for losers” and “I want to spend lunch with my friends”

she has recently been assessed as having a visual processing disorder (as does DD1) and we have been told she isn’t dyslexic, but the same school said DD1 wasn’t dyslexic and college say she is, DH is and so is DS.

again last week I told her maths teacher she was crying over the homework, despite me helping her (I refuse to do it for her, which would be a damn sight easier!) and this week we all received an email telling us they were moving away from the 100% requirement to the kids completing 1 hour, unless the child has been given a reduced requirement (DD2 had been given this before the email came out).

the email talked a lot about their mental health. DD has no idea i have told her teacher the homework makes her cry, more than once. What I will however say is that despite hating maths, DD loves her maths teacher, and wants to keep her for GCSE.

ask the school to change the 100% requirement

Any number of kids can be quiet in class and refuse to answer questions or contribute (and part of adapting to some of these children's SEND is to not put them on the spot with questions or an expectation to speak because they don't like it). How do you tell if somebody who won't contribute or leaves the room/doesn't arrive for end of unit test lessons understands? Checking the online homework.

Oh, she's completing it all and getting top marks. Seems like she is getting it after all. No need to speak to her and possibly put her on the spot, embarrass her, make her feel like you're demanding communication or you're accusing her of cheating when she's got 100% on everything/bullying/judging her, looks like she's fine.

How do you tell if somebody who won't contribute or leaves the room/doesn't arrive for end of unit test lessons understands?
I'd have thought that behaviour in itself would suggest that all is not ok.

If its not to be done under exam conditions then I don't see the issue. Punishing them for getting things wrong is ridiculous, mistakes are a good way to learn.

Unpick why she thinks she is cheating. If she uses someone else’s work and copies it that is cheating. If she is looking up answers and using different reasoning it may be that she is not cheating at all.

It's common ds has the same punitive system I google the answers for him if he can't get it right the first second or even third time we work the answer backwards to the question for the most part but some nights I just tell him it's this answer now move on!

Ours also does sparx maths I sit there with him as he’s only just started and tbh I haven’t much of a clue either but I encourage him to click the ‘I don’t know’ button which then gives an explanation.
if you keep getting it wrong it will switch questions and will go back a stage by the looks of it.
Most of his friends are already looking up the answers which I don’t understand as they are meant to put some workings out in their books so I don’t think book checks can be being done.
I would mention to the Sen team about her feeling so much pressure she is having to look up the answers, rather then frame it as cheating.
At our sons school they can go into the library for 45 mins after school and there are two TAs on hand to give help if anyone is stuck, so it may be worth checking if your school has something similar.
My son is autistic and they have put things in place from the start to help with his wellbeing, so hopefully once your schools team are aware of her struggles they can step up and help