How did this poor couple’s four other daughters not realise…

[Zippidydoodah]

…that they’d been dead for four years?

I don’t normally start threads, nor do I post about horrific news reports like this one, but I am shocked beyond comprehension that a family would just accept their sister’s claims that their parents were fine……while they were actually dead, for FOUR YEARS.

Those poor, poor people. 😔

https://www.lbc.co.uk/news/virginia-mccullough-murder-essex-great-baddow-police-arrest/

Some of the speculation and wonderings on this thread have already been answered. For those who are interested, this was the live reporting during sentencing:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cgmglzvnl1yt?page=4

I was about to quote that one, also near my home town of Mansfield, although I've moved elsewhere since growing up there. Both cases have similarities, matter of fact confessions, although the one in the Chad cites husband and wife who I think, were jointly charged.
Whatever we think in terms of how weird it all might be, you've got some very disturbed people there as perpetrators

When I saw the news footage of her arrest I thought it interesting how she spoke to the police about her parents. She said to them about her dad something like “he’s in there” but for her mum she said something like “you’ll find it (my bold/emphasis) upstairs behind the wardrobe”.

And the fact she “gently” poisoned her dad, but beat and stabbed her mother would suggest there’s history there.

Very odd that the supposed loving and caring siblings and grandchildren hadn’t had anything to do with them for years. Mind you it sounds like Virginia was very manipulative.

This is just around the corner from me. We went past the house every week taking DS to and from a club. So awful thinking what had happened there.

These days, everyone aged 75 and over has a named GP. I expect that periodically they check on anyone in this age group who they haven't seen or heard from for a while. Most people of that age would undoubtedly be on at least one type of medication, so that would need to be reviewed from time to time.

So tragic!

Agree with a PP that the smell must have been awful for months. Serious mental health issues going on here clearly....

But yes - the other siblings must have been NC. Nobody would think it normal to have not even a phone conversation from time to time. And the parents were quite young - they would have had mobile phones and Whatsapp groups surely? So sad that nobody noticed for 4 years!

My DDad is much older and doesn't do smartphones etc - but we still chat every few weeks on the landline, and I visit every month or two (they're an hour or so away). Nobody with any sort of relationship with their parent/s would go four years and not question it. It's all really sad.

Maybe they were abusive & the other kids got free & didn't want or care about contact. Maybe the daughter was left behind to care for them? If Rose & Fred west's child was up for the same thing, after knowing what happened, should you ask the same question ?

Maybe, but why then issue statements saying they were beloved parents / grandparents?

My friend’s sister did something similar- although obviously not extreme.

friend and I live 5 hours from her mum. She’d always felt a bit “othered” as she’s find out about family events afterward- turns out the sister was telling the parents she wouldn’t be able to come because it was too far, no babysitter, or some such excuse.

lockdown was the kicker. Obviously friend couldn’t go visit. She phoned, FaceTimed etc but eventually was having to phone the sister to speak to mum- turns out the ringer had been turned off, or the phone wasn’t charged, or some such.

after lockdown friend had to physically make the 5 hour journey to speak to her mum as there was no other contact. She did have a good relationship- I can imaging if it wasn’t a great one the effort of maintaining it may have meant contact gradually stopped.

turns out sister had taken hundreds of thousands of pounds from her mum over covid. Had taken her bank cards and wouldn’t give her access to her money. She’s now living with my friend.

but I can see how gradually adult children can be alienated. I think if my friend and her mum didn’t have such a close relationship she may have gone years with no contact.

That's because doctors get a (small) payment for you being on their list, even if they never see you, whereas dentists only get paid for actual check-ups and treatment.

Could the response from the other kids simply be a case of not wanting to speak ill of the dead. If they do have issues from their upbringing they might prefer to keep that private rather than make statements about it.

Its a cautionary tale isn't it to reply on text only communication.

Agree, though given how many people seem to see it as completely normal to have minimal contact with even the people they are closest to it's probably not an unusual situation.

Absolutely, what else aer they going to say, its socially accepted that you say nice things about your parents when they die.

I thought this but then I went and looked at what the statements actually said. They could absolutely have just condemed their sister or given more generic "we will always miss mum and dad" quotes, or as one said ""To me this situation is quite literally a living nightmare from which I will never wake up...The haunting thoughts of [whether] my parents suffered, if they were taunted," but they specifically act as though they were incredibly close, which doesn't make any sense.

""Our mum was kind, caring and thoughtful. Mum delighted in her grandchildren."

How can someone "delight" in their grandchildren if they haven't seen or even spoken to them (e.g. on facetime) in more than 4 years, when presumably they live in the same country?

"Child two" says they feel "sick to my core" every day.
"We have been cruelly robbed of more loving memories and bonds with our mum and dad for years to come," they add.
"How dare Virginia rob us of that life?
Again - the dad was quite ill, you'd think if you were that into making loving memories you would have attempted to visit at some point in four years?

Her uncle (mother's brother) said "There are precious times with Lois and John I will miss out on because of the wicked act of their own daughter."
Again, they can't be that precious if you went half a decade without trying to make those 'precious times' happen!

The quote from child 3 is interesting:
"Your lies about our parents' actions and their whereabouts made out as if they didn’t value seeing us," they wrote.
"You have left a hole in my heart forever and a piece of me died with them the day you took them from us."
It provides some explanations as in she was probably making excuses via texts if they did offer to meet up/visit - but this can only go so far. Any normally close family would start seeing red flags if you'd previously been in frequent contact with your parents and then it suddenly stopped.

To go for years, including Christmas, birthdays etc. with never seeing, or even speaking to your parents directly (other than, it seems only one (faked) phone call, to one of the sisters - which is also weird, my sister doesn't sound anything like my mother!) - is not a close family. Which is fine, they are under no obligation to spill the private details of their relationships to the world, but just give generic statements in that case, don't give misleading statements suggesting you were far closer than you were.

Whhhhhhhat? How did they believe that their parents were just unavailable to chat on the phone or whatever for four years? That's mad!

@another1bitestheduck this is exactly how I read it and summed up perfectly. Thank you. 🙏

My surgery dropped me. I didn’t contact them for a few years (I wasn’t ill and had no reason to contact them) and I only found out when I tried to make an appointment there. Luckily I was able to re register and didn’t have to move surgeries.

This happened five mins away from me. As a true crime occasional binge watcher via YT on the tv or netflix etc .. most the ‘out there’ true life murder stories i’ve watched or followed have been in america as everything so much bigger and ‘shinier’ there .. big mansions, big hair , big life insurances so they seem it ‘acceptable’ to try and off the OH for millions abs millions of dollars and then move the nanny or fit handsome gardener in and kick the grown step kiddos to the curb after inheriting every last dime

so it’s crazy to think the very modest house I walked past a couple of hundred of times (the daughter Virginia wore a big fake pregnancy bump for like 27 months!! i think that’s akin to a whales pregnancy (?) but she was very odd but still ‘odd’ or ‘fake baby bumps’ works never gave you think there are two skeletons dressed in their ‘sunday best’ in their home for nearly half a decade doesn’t bare thinking about .. takes a whole other meaning of ‘you never know what goes on behind closed doors ‘ when it comes to my very own neighbours!