Feeling resentful of cooking...

[PlopSofa]

Have you ever thought you just can't make yet another meal?

It's like I've been doing this, feeding the family for 16 years now, 2 DC and a DH and I'm so fed up of cooking for them all. Night after night. On and on it goes.

I like good food but DH incompetent and the kids rock up each meal time like it's a hotel. So it's just me in the kitchen.

Please no suggestions for getting them involved. Both on the spectrum and it's hard to get anything done, let alone cooking. DH works night and day, never around so he's no good either.

I am so fed up of cooking. How do you muster the energy to cook night after night after night, if it's always you?

If I won the lottery I'd employ a professional chef.

Tonight it's an M&S ready meal as I can't face cooking again. They are tasty but I feel guilty too. I should be cooking from scratch. But I hate the time and effort it takes. I just hate cooking. I never realised that being a DM I'd have to cook so much and try and be creative. It's one of the things I dislike the most about being a DM. The endless cooking.

I now have my steady 7 meals which revolve round day after day, week after week but OMG I am so fucking bored of it all. Add to that the sensory issues of kids/DH that won't eat certain things. The limited list. OMFG.

I crave an escape to a place where I can just cook for myself and eat out, maybe on the streets of Nice or some sunny getaway with a view of the sea where I can just be alone with no one else to cook for!

Even batch cooking requires planning and wifework, so it’s not a huge break!

I really like cooking but this still resonates with me. Sometimes it just gets exhausting. For me, i can shake it up wth new recipes sometimes which helps a lot.

And sometimes I just say, "no, I'm not doing it" and we get a takeaway or DH organises something based on beige food in the freezer and steamed veg.

Meal planning, while tedious, is really good for me. I find that it means that while I still have to cook every day, I don' thave to THINK about food except for that 60 minutres while I'm meal planning and then doing my online shop. It's quite odd how it literally isn't even in my head until I go downstairs to start cooking.

I can’t empathise, thankfully. My husband does most of the cooking.

Calm down.
My point is if you didn't feel full from toast, then you might start grazing and snacking all evening.

Tonight it's an M&S ready meal as I can't face cooking again. They are tasty but I feel guilty too. I should be cooking from scratch. But I hate the time and effort it takes. I just hate cooking. I never realised that being a DM I'd have to cook so much and try and be creative. It's one of the things I dislike the most about being a DM. The endless cooking.

You don't have to cook everything from scratch every day. Ready meals are fine if you can afford them. So is tinned food. So is Pizza. Whatever you feel like chucking out. And if anyone complains? they can learn to cook.

I know you said in your OP @PlopSofa that it's no use getting DH and DCs involved but frankly that is your biggest and stupidest mistake. Gather everyone together, once a week. Make a meal plan. If they won't join in: beans on toast every day until they do. Vary it with spaghetti hoops on toast.

It isn't forever but you are doing yourself and your family no favours by just being a martyr.

am not seeing a downside to that

This is pretty much what I did. I will very happily live off beans and toast indefinitely. It wasn’t me who cracked first. 🤣

Oh good I know exactly as I was given a cooking lesson as a Christmas present!!
I had a total tantrum especially as it was in a flat in a block where I have several clients( social worker!)
What sort of present is that!! A torture!

Couple of weeks practical suggestions:

1. meal prep boxes - some excellent new customer deals on Gousto, hello fresh etc. take away the ‘what to eat’ and shopping. I then don’t mind the cooking with radio on.
2. Start 1 night a week you don’t cook at all and everyone has picky bits from fridge (ham, cheese, bread, grapes, etc). Be clear that say Tuesday is your no cook day. Anyone else welcome to do it.
3. Might be worth discussing with kids if they would be up for owning making dinner one week. I know you said not practical but worth asking?
4. Have 1 day a week you know is a ready meal job. Could buy a few at start of month then you know say ‘Thursdays’ also taken care of.

Good luck!