Feeling resentful of cooking...

[PlopSofa]

Have you ever thought you just can't make yet another meal?

It's like I've been doing this, feeding the family for 16 years now, 2 DC and a DH and I'm so fed up of cooking for them all. Night after night. On and on it goes.

I like good food but DH incompetent and the kids rock up each meal time like it's a hotel. So it's just me in the kitchen.

Please no suggestions for getting them involved. Both on the spectrum and it's hard to get anything done, let alone cooking. DH works night and day, never around so he's no good either.

I am so fed up of cooking. How do you muster the energy to cook night after night after night, if it's always you?

If I won the lottery I'd employ a professional chef.

Tonight it's an M&S ready meal as I can't face cooking again. They are tasty but I feel guilty too. I should be cooking from scratch. But I hate the time and effort it takes. I just hate cooking. I never realised that being a DM I'd have to cook so much and try and be creative. It's one of the things I dislike the most about being a DM. The endless cooking.

I now have my steady 7 meals which revolve round day after day, week after week but OMG I am so fucking bored of it all. Add to that the sensory issues of kids/DH that won't eat certain things. The limited list. OMFG.

I crave an escape to a place where I can just cook for myself and eat out, maybe on the streets of Nice or some sunny getaway with a view of the sea where I can just be alone with no one else to cook for!

Op what is your standard menu??? Can you do dump bags to go in the slow cooker perhaps!?? Totally agree it's getting monotonous cooking x

Sometimes it makes me feel resentful. Dh and one DS still living at home. Love them to bits but every evening I feel like screaming “THERE’S MORE TO ME THAN OPENING A TIN OF POXY BAKED BEANS” Seems like only yesterday I worked in London, went to the pub after work then wherever the evening took us. I don’t like being a grown up much

Food is the most boring thing on the planet. Buying it, dragging it home, storing it, prepping it, cooking it...and then it's gone in a few minutes and there's a load of mess to clean up. I can't imagine doing it for myself, never mind a family.

Because I only have to cook for myself, I have basically eaten the same thing for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day for about 10 years.

I hear you OP, it's bloody tedious but I do really simple stuff in the week such as pitta bread pizzas, served with a bag of salad, it's so quick, other times I do jacket potatoes with a tin of chilli and sometimes we have fish finger or sausage sandwiches .One day a week DH cooks a proper meal such as spag bol or pasta bake and probably once or twice a month we eat out. I don't do slaving over a hot stove except at Christmas!

I hate thinking of what to eat but these recipes are great and have livened up our menus for not much effort - I was completely fed up with the whole rigmarole.

www.tamingtwins.com/

I've been cooking daily for 30+ years. I put my foot down in lock down and started buying Mark's food. No waste. I buy fish, steak and chicken in portions.
I don't eat meat now so I do a fish parcel, sweetcorn other veg (usually out of a steam packet).. The clan have a variation of the same.
I cook one pasta a week, the adult DS cooks once a week and the DH buys posh quiche for his contribution as he really can't cook. The DD makes cakes and puddings and usually feeds herself as she is food fussy.
My sister, mum & bil were chefs. I trained to a high standard but hated people watching me cook but loved cooking. I bloody don't now. My husband does all the washing and most of the shopping. He also does the pot wash, that I never do.
I recommend an airfyer. The best thing I ever bought. No bending down. Press a button, that's it. I have a Tefal dual model.

I’ve been feeling like this for a while. Glad it’s not just me. DH is away so I am using the time to work out what food would look like just for me. I won’t stop cooking for him but I might organise it all differently. We have different attitudes to food and the divergence is becoming greater as we get older. I used to like cooking and enjoy food but providing meals for someone with a very limited range, little appetite and no interest in food who would prefer not have to eat at all is soul destroying.

It's not stupid of you. It's a con by society which shows women's work as invisible and men's work as important.
We need a revolution 💪

Yes op boring as fuck, also add picky eaters into the mix and yawn.
I think 1: don't feel guilty for ready meals I do this at least twice per week no one's died lol, and 2 have you tried gousto? , I did this in lock down and quite enjoyed choosing the meals each week, plus everything weighed out and delivered win win .

Oh I absolutely feel the same. I’m not a creative person at all and really struggle to come up with lovely new meal ideas, even the ones in my repeat repertoire are really boring, basically some variation of a stir fry most nights. DC are home for half term this week and I feel like I haven’t stopped making food, DS has breakfast at 7 then wants something else at 10.30 and lunch at 1, snack at 4 before dinner and it’s just bloody endless. They never know what they actually want to eat, just whine that they’re hungry, but everything I suggest is a NO! Also don’t get me started on what each family member will of won’t eat, drives me MAD!

Oh can I join? No kids here but I fell out of love with cooking during lockdown. I really used to enjoy it too and that’s never come back. We can manage breakfast and lunch, but dinners are an utter pain. Had fresh baguette with ham and cheese tonight cause I was in town and they’d just brought them out of the oven. I’m already pondering what to do tomorrow…

Lovely solidarity on here. I’m feeling cheered in my sense of apathy towards food!

For me it’s knowing DS is only 13 and I have at least 5 more years of dinners to go. I’ve already done it for bleedin 16 years and yet there’s no end in sight.

its something that changes isn’t it? Once you become a mum. You start thinking in terms of YEARS. And that can be quite depressing.

As PP said it’s hard being a grown up. Was I spoilt through my youth being an extended teen until I became a mum?

I so miss the days of being footloose and fancy free. Eating whatever, whenever, no plans as such. Living in the moment.

parenthood is just a marathon planning session around everything taking into everyone else’s needs where yours comes last, or not at all!

sorry for the moan, but this is helping!

Did that fill.you up though? Not really a filling meal.

Another one here sick of it. DH and eldest teen have gone away leaving me with the asd who only eats two meals that I can't stand, but the other two being gone means I am existing on toast with eggs and muesli and feel so much better. So little washing up as well. Things are going to change when they get back!

Sometimes I used to make a huge rice pudding in the oven and we'd all just have that for tea 😂 nobody ever complained.

I tend to eat cold foods now, so no cooking. I prefer it. Dh will cook, but not every night. Tonight I've had apple, cheese, crisp breads with marmalade on and some flapjack with raisins in.

I hit a wall about six months ago. It wasn't the cooking but the thinking. Had a conversation one day with DH:

Me - can you sort dinner tonight obese?
Him - sure what would you like?
Me - 🤦‍♀️

We now have Hello Fresh for three nights a week. Let them decide.

(Fortunately no DC or fussy eaters in the house)

🙋I hate cooking too. Single parent and it’s all the drag of planning, shopping, preparing and then, inevitably it being rejected by one or other child. And bland food.

Mine are almost adult age now and I’ve told them it’s time for them to start taking their turn. I’ve taught them to cook so they can, but they won’t. I haven’t cooked for five days now and there’s been no meals (and the dishwasher hasn’t been emptied). It’s actually bliss, and I’m not sure I will ever cook again.

I recently started seeing someone but, somehow having a man around triggered yet more cooking. He likes ‘cooking together’ but somehow i do most of it. I don’t think it will last 😬

Me too.. I’ve stopped cooking. It’s every man for himself now.

we have older kids. Just one very self sufficient teen left in the nest.

DH medically retired a few years ago and I work FT in a fairly stressful role. He did go through a phase of asking me what was for tea, but getting answers ranging from ‘haven’t a bloody clue‘ through ‘dunno, what you going to make‘ to ‘fucked if I know, make something‘ seemed to cure that.

i switch between the various meal kit delivery offers, on the proviso that I’ll order, but wont cook the damn things. Otherwise I just live off cereal and the odd Tesco meal deal.

Me me me.

if you are the only one cooking I think you should feel zero guilt about having ready meals.

I resent the imbalance So much that when I have made something nice and my DH is like ooh this is nice I am just so salty I say something like yes it must be nice to have someone cook something nice for you. Then I stab him with my fork.

er. So no advice here!

Stab him with my fork!

I’ll have to try that 😆

Traybakes and one pot (or 2) is the answer for me.
I get the kids involved in meal planning to take some of the mental load off.

I hate it too. We mix in very basic, low prep meals like beans on toast, jacket potato to ease the burden. And I bulk cook when I make nicer meals so I have days when all I need to do is defrost and heat.

The problem is my tray bake attempts come out burnt, dry, or the veg or meat is undercooked/overcooked but it never works simultaneously. I don’t know why.

and then AFRID DS says I can’t eat that cos it’s all mixed up. And I have to open a tin of tuna with waffles him. Drives me effing potty.

This is me, I actually love cooking and if I was just catering for myself I could happily eat for a month without having the same thing twice. Instead we eat the same few meals on repeat, I swear once the kids have moved out I’m never eating bloody pasta again!