Who else is awake... come tell me why?

[MessyNeate]

DH's taxi will be collecting him at 2am. He's off back to sea for 12 weeks 🥲

No point sleeping until he's gone. So I'm watching MAFS UK whilst he's in the shower and packing up the last few little bits

I have a pretty busy day tomorrow so hoping once he's left I can get some sleep, I'm always sad when he goes though. This time home we got married and went on honeymoon 😁

Can you prop yourself up and lay on your back with the headphones blasting brown noise? Hope you get some sleep.

Terrible jet lag after visiting family in California for 2 weeks. It’s always worse coming back. Loved the sunshine, hate the sleeplessness.

Feeling exactly the same! I feel really out of it and dissociated which I'm presuming is the fever. Usually I fight things off after 2 or 3 days. I've just emailed to take today off work.

Is this a new relationship or a longstanding one?

If new, I would walk away now for your own peace of mind. Your happiness, your calmness, the sanctity of your home all really matter.

Ha ha, what? Obviously he's going to work!

How lovely (the Mexico gin not the headache)

Feeling absolutely rotten, sore throat, blocked nose, heartburn and on top of that now im throwing up for no apparent reason 😭

Set an alarm at midnight to take medication and now doing a night feed… the joys!

I woke up at 2 am feeling sick. Still feeling unwell. Not sure if it's a virus or something else. I'm still awake because now I'm deciding whether I should go into work today or not and realise I can't decide. I feel terrible 😞

Agree with this. The relationship will cause you a headache if you stay. It's not worth it.

I'm six hours behind GMT, so I'm sitting on my couch watching the news and weather,, waiting for the dryer to finish drying my clothes, which I'll sort and fold and put away before bed.

@LostittoBostik thank you. Not sure if you would call it 'new' or 'longstanding' - just under 3 years. Fortunately we do not live together and we only see one another at weekends when, after work, I drive up to her city to spend the weekend with her. But, yes, increasingly lately I see red flags being waved at me, more and more examples of 'dogwhistling', DARVO and 'triangularion' - time to get out for my own sanity and safety!

@CharlieDickens, it is causing me sleepless nights or, like tonight, fitful sleep, punctuated by lucid, bad dreams and is now affecting my physical as well as mental wellbeing

Are you married, or just really optimistic?

I’ve been awake all night.

I got some inheritance then DH told me he had debts I never knew he had, he said it was for things for us, I thought fair enough and gave him half the money thinking he won’t need so much from me every month and he’s now telling me it might not make a difference.

so last night we argued about it and I feel like asking for it back if it won’t make any difference. I just don’t know what to do.

Sounds like you need a fulll & open chat about financial matters. He shouldn't have debts you don't know about. Can you pull together a full k
Spreadsheet of assets, savings, debts & see how it looks.

Yes we need to do that, I’ve asked him and he keeps changing the amount so I’ll ask him to show me. It’s frustrating as I wanted to take us all in the holiday if a life time but I feel most of or all will need to go in these debts.
one set of my grandparents live abroad and I’d like to visit them before it’s too late ( they are very old and struggling, with carers in house now). but DH doesn’t think it’s fair if I don’t take all the step kids ( who don’t really know my grandparents and don’t speak to them when they visit). But I just don’t see how I can afford to take us all now and I’m only really going to spend time with my grandparents. I’m so stuck and I can’t stop crying 😭

Aww 12 weeks op? That's a long time! My dp has been away for 10 so far and still has 2-3 to go....I've been missing him lots recently. I imagine this trip will be a bit tougher after just getting married! Congratulations 🥂

I wake with back pain every night. I've been up since 4. Going back to bed at 7 for a couple of hours then up to take toddler to nursery at 9. Ahh

Eh?

That sounds like it needs a lot of unpacking. How much debt does he actually have? Sounds like you need to sit down together and make a plan. You should know what he's spending money on, how much it costs and where it's coming from in your budget.

What an utterly random thing to say.

he chose a career which means he has to go out to see. That is just selfish

Someone has to do it 🤷🏻‍♀️

What’s he gone out to see I wonder? Sounds like a fun job.

he chose a career which means he has to go out to see. That is just selfish

To see what?