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Original poster

Second hand toys…Is it really that bad?!

129 replies

Bunbum · 08/10/2024 18:52

So I was talking to a friend this afternoon about how expensive this xmas is going to be (for various reasons). I’m stressing to be honest as my eldest (4yo) is hopeful to be receiving a few specific toys which are costing up to £100 each (honestly, a paw patrol lookout tower is over £100……. Like what?!).

I looked on FB marketplace and there’s lots of these toys on there that are clearly in good working condition and I asked her if she thought I should just get some second hand toys and wrap them up but she was mortified and said that she couldn’t gift her child a second hand toy for christmas….

Is it really that bad?!

OP posts:
Ivymedication · 09/10/2024 08:42

I always buy 2nd hand if I can, and like a PP was able to surprise DS with a massive Thomas set which cost me around £20, whereas I think I'd have got about 2.5 trains for that money.

Hes order now so it's mostly looking on Vinted for 'cool' clothes and hoping I'm getting it right.

Nothing beats my mum and her BFF, they were the OGs. They used to buy stuff out of the newspaper, often driving miles to get it for us. Then they would circle it in the Argos catalogue and pretend that Santa thought we might like this sort of thing, along with a few red herrings. I was seriously shocked for years that Santa knew just what I wanted. And that my BFF had similar stuff to me, because her mum did the little sewing bits to pimp up the 2nd hand buys and my Dad did the carpentry or metalwork. And my mum added some paint or stickers.

Amazing memories.
And DS now he 'knows' is glad of it too....who wouldn't like a masive bucket of duplo (£25) over one little set

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 09/10/2024 08:49

Much better to buy second hand. Landfill is full of discarded Xmas presents. Give the presents a good clean and they’ll be great.

Allthehorsesintheworld · 09/10/2024 08:53

My dgc have been brought up to reuse & recycle. Dgds are big fans of Vinted and charity shops. Our go to is always can we buy it used ( except for a few things like underwear!) There’s too much crap in the world and not only are you helping the planet you’re bringing your child up to be less selfish and respect the world they live in. 👏

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soundsys · 09/10/2024 08:54

It's absolutely fine! In fact preferable as you're saving plastic from landfill!

(We have the Paw Patrol monstrosity of which you speak and no way would I be spending £100 on it. Ours is second hand and had the benefit they could start playing with it right away, rather than detaching all the bits first!)

hiredandsqueak · 09/10/2024 09:03

Dd has sold grandson's outgrown or unplayed with toys on Vinted to make room for new ones. They were in like new condition and complete so the only difference would be the lack of packaging which when they are 3 or 4 would be a blessing tbh. She has also bought him toys from Vinted and always been happy with what she has bought. Any that don't sell she takes to the local charity shop which has been a source of the Disney cars he loves too. Save your money and look at second hand, do it now though before prices rise as they will the nearer it gets to Christmas.

Snugglemonkey · 09/10/2024 09:08

I think it is a sensible choice. I have bought lots of stuff second hand. Actually, some of the presents Santa brought were not available any more. Dc had seen them at playgroups or whatever and wanted them, so I tracked them down. Dc have never seemed to notice.

StMarieforme · 09/10/2024 09:41

I often did when mine were younger. No worries. She's being snobby.

SootspriteSearcher · 09/10/2024 10:07

Mine have had second hand every year and are now 16 and 12. It's harder now to find second hand for them as they like specific clothes and interests. But I do try wherever possible!

I would probably say we are working class. We were young when dd1 was born and didn't have much spare cash so was second hand all the way. And I did also buy second hand from charity shops/car boots and sell online for a profit to buy the things I couldn't get second hand which some people might judge me for. My best bargain was a happyland fold up box filled with houses, people and cars for £5 at a church fair which I gave to dd for her 2nd Christmas.

And BTW you are lucky to find paw patrol second hand now! Dd2 was super into it during the time when you couldn't get the pups and definitely not second hand. I had to import Rocky and Zuma from America! I managed to find 2 of the rare at the time robopups in argos and sold on for 3 times the price on ebay to cover the cost and made a little profit 😉

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 09/10/2024 10:08

Totally normal and fine. So many toys barely get played with so they are on great condition. It's a good idea and reduces waste. your friend needs to take a leaf out of your book

ThursdaysMonkey · 09/10/2024 10:12

A friend gave us a huge amount of paw patrol and a tower last year for Christmas.
Because it wasn't all boxed up we were able to set it all up u ser the tree so he was able to play with it straightaway. No kid (or parent!) wants to spend Christmas day unpacking fiddly cardboard and putting in endless batteries- think of it as time saving!

mumonthehill · 09/10/2024 10:15

We used to get so many toys from the charity shop, brio, duplo, books. When they are little they have no idea. Ds17 is now addicted to vinted and buys so much there.

Elderberrier · 09/10/2024 10:16

If I was going to buy a paw patrol tower first thing I’d do is look on gumtree, eBay etc. I do think this is a weird class thing. I think more deprived people or those who have been in the past sometimes see second hand as a mark of shame or poverty. Middle class or wealthier people happily do lots of things second hand and I think often doesn’t occur to them this would be a problem.

ellabella2345 · 09/10/2024 10:17

It is a great idea and better for the planet - less waste. There is loads of good stuff on there, we got a fab play kitchen recently. Charity shops are also good for stocking fillers to I tap like lots of little cars/books/puzzles. Best to just ignore people and do what you want to do

2dogsandabudgie · 09/10/2024 10:21

Bunbum · 08/10/2024 18:52

So I was talking to a friend this afternoon about how expensive this xmas is going to be (for various reasons). I’m stressing to be honest as my eldest (4yo) is hopeful to be receiving a few specific toys which are costing up to £100 each (honestly, a paw patrol lookout tower is over £100……. Like what?!).

I looked on FB marketplace and there’s lots of these toys on there that are clearly in good working condition and I asked her if she thought I should just get some second hand toys and wrap them up but she was mortified and said that she couldn’t gift her child a second hand toy for christmas….

Is it really that bad?!

I used to tell my children that they wouldn't get everything on their list if the toys were expensive. There's nothing wrong in telling children that you haven't got the money for a long list of toys.

Also nothing wrong in buying second hand.

stargirl1701 · 09/10/2024 10:26

We always tried to buy second hand toys for DC. Especially if they were plastic. It's not sustainable to buy new plastic toys.

NeedWineNow · 09/10/2024 10:39

We don't have children ourselves but I always used to buy my nephews stuff from charity shops, boot fairs and the like. I've also bought second hand toys and books as gifts for our friends children.

I tend to look out in charity shops for suitable gifts for the rest of the family as well - I bought a great Estella Bartlett large glittery pouch a couple of years ago which still had the tags on in the charity shop for £5. Popped in in my SIL's present along with some slippers and smellies that she wanted and she was absolutely thrilled with it. It's the way to go IMO.

I

AllThePotatoesAreSingingJingleBells · 09/10/2024 10:41

my kids get a mix of new and second hand. They don’t know it’s preloved, it’s new to them!

Letmehaveabloodyusernameplease · 09/10/2024 10:42

Absolutely fine, your little one won't care, probably won't even know and will love them. And it saves you money.

BogRollBOGOF · 09/10/2024 10:43

DS1's best ever present was the Diesel Works he had his heart set on from the promos on his Thomas Day of the Diesels DVD. Ebay saved us as it was discontinued.

He didn't have any presents for his first Christmas as a newborn baby- we didn't even know if he/she would be born by then! At a few days old, it wasn't something that he was fretting over.

For DS2's first Christmas, we'd stashed away the baby toys a few months earlier and re-wrapped them. There was no point in buying in extra toys for a baby under 1 when we had what we needed anyway.

The DCs have always had their needs and a good proportion of their wants met. Some of that is new things, but we often pass around pre-loved things between family and friends. Good items survive use by many children.

Tableglass · 09/10/2024 10:47

I’m a bit fussy about second hand clothes but think second hand toys are a winner on all levels

LegoTherapy · 09/10/2024 11:40

I draw the line at knickers but most stuff is fair game for being second hand. Ds is 9 and just happy to have what he asks for. He likes looking on vinted with me. He often wants retired Lego sets and second hand is the only way to go besides paying crazy prices for rare sets. I think it's great there's such a big second hand market for toys. Less waste, more play, more happiness. My friend sends our unused/grow out of toys out to an African country and we get videos of the children playing with them which is great. My son and daughter have sent bikes, scooters, roller skates and all sorts out and the joy on the children's faces is lovely for them to see.
If something can be washed or cleaned and is in perfect or very good condition then I think it's a great way to buy gifts.
Your friend is daft and missing a trick. Second hand means more money for other things.

Normallynumb · 09/10/2024 11:42

It's absolutely fine!
It makes sense on so many levels and DC won't even notice.
Your friend has more money than sense and doesn't care about the environment

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/10/2024 11:49

When our dses were smaller, we used to buy clothes second hand for them - NCT nearly new sales were an absolute boon, as were charity shops. We did find that, as they got older, there was less in the way of second hand clothing available - I assumed that children got harder on their clothes as they got older, whereas little ones might grow out of clothes before they wore them out.

I still buy second hand clothes for myself, and one of ds1's favourite presents, as an adult, was a vintage tweed jacket I bought from ebay.

Ariela · 09/10/2024 11:59

My eldest had a HUGE set made of about 5 lots of second hand Brio and Brio-alike train stuff. Meant she could run a train the entire length of downstairs and was always a firm favourite when friends came to play, as there was so much track and enough room to run a train each. Cost about 1/10 the price of new.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/10/2024 12:01

We kept all the boys' Brio, and have handed it on to ds1, @Ariela - supposedly for our granddaughter to play with, but I suspect he will be playing with it as much as she does - lol!