Lighthearted. If you became leader of the universe...

[OverthinkingOlive]

What new rules would you put into place?

1. People who spit on the floor would be fined £100,000 every single time. With increasing interest

1. People would be breathalysed before boarding a plane - and turned away if levels were too high

1. Crisps and fucking annoying rustling wrappers would be banned from all public transport and cinemas

1. Love Island would be scrapped and any contestant on any TV show would have to sign a contract promising to return to obscurity at the end of the show

1. Self service checkouts do not exist

It would be criminal offence for anyone to put any pieces of sellotape on the edges of second-hand jigsaw puzzles. 3 years minimum.

I'd ban browser cookies/pop ups/anything that confuses you and the X button for it to go away is disguised!

I agree with this one. If internet users really do believe that "stealing your privacy is important to us" and value the wonderful things that cookies can apparently do for them, why not have all non-essential ones switched off by default and then offer to allow eager users to go and opt themselves straight in?!

All vehicles will be fitted with a speaker above the driver's head and a sensor on the end of the bonnet, so that drivers who leave less than 5m between them and the vehicle in front, when travelling at 20mph or more, will have a horrendous loud continuous parping brown noise sound blasted right into their ear holes, until they drop back to a safer distance.

• world peace; absolutely no wars allowed what so ever

• no smoking at all in any public spaces , not even designated areas (I get this is harsh but I just can't stand the smell)

• Don't get taxed unless you earn 50k a year

• eradicate poverty, somehow. There's an injustice when some are living off tinned beans and freezing cold conditions in their own homes and others own 10 Ferraris

• Companies would not be allowed to unfairly over charge - there would be a law against it and they would be shamed

• rapists and murderers would be given the death penalty, the money saved from keeping them alive and sheltered in prison would go towards pay rises for EVERYONE

• Oh and very sick and unwell people could be euthanised if they have the capacity to agree to it. They could also decide this before they lose the capacity. Again, this is saving money long term

Further to my point about rapists and murderers , everyone is happy! Less scum walking the earth , safer community, happier community!

Sorry not so light hearted haha

I can't believe that all the posts on this thread are about planet earth! If I was leader of the universe I would get a special slide made so that I could whizz through black holes without dying. And I would build some sort of wall that I could call the edge of the universe, because infinity is too unsettling.

A) all dog food turns their poo fluorescent yellow
B) schools have roundabouts for parents to drop off instead of parking dangerously around the school
C) snickers calorie free
D) when the weather says 'thunderstorm ' we ACTUALLY get it...false alarms all year and i love storms

Well I'd start by banning mornings. I'd maybe allow a few light sunny ones if it's summer and I'm in a good mood, but not too many of them.

All dogs including my own can be in or out. but they need to make their fucking minds up which they want and not spend all evening going in and out when I just want to sit on my arse.

And it will be illegal to put up "road closed ahead" signs without specifying which road and where it is closed.

Work wise, the general public can stop being dickheads when I'm actually trying to help them.

Some great ideas here.

I would ban all rustly wrapping. Manufacturers would have to make all packaging quiet.

Agree with massive fines for spitting in public.

Massive fines for not picking up dog poo.

It would be against the law to complain about the cost of parking. But there would be a universal app for parking and not several different ones, to make things slightly easier. Also, I would create a committee of brainy people to make bus timetables easier to understand and somehow standardised, to help more people use buses.

on a more serious note, I would ban surrogacy.

I would ban manufacturers from scenting things that shouldn’t be scented, like bin liners and sanitary towels.

Every town would have a lovely outdoor swimming pool.

House building companies would have to make all new houses and flats super eco friendly and massively soundproof.

That’s all I can think of for now - realise I’d be a somewhat parochial and petty leader of the universe but would probably come up with some bigger ideas in due course.

Football would be banned and all money involved would be put towards NHS, schools etc.

Any one who has been successful in getting tickets for a "big" concert is banned from trying to get tickets for any other concert until I have got tickets for all the big concerts I want to go to.

Beige. I'd ban beige.

And it will be illegal to put up "road closed ahead" signs without specifying which road and where it is closed

YES!

And "Every town would have a lovely outdoor swimming pool." Yes, this as well but I would make sure it was heated too. And no dogs in it as there wouldn't an "end of season" if it were heated.

Bugger. My whole house is beige except for the kitchen.

Not wanting to lose the 'lighthearted' nature of this thread, but when you say 'agree to it', do you mean make the fully-informed entirely free choice themselves or maybe acquiesce to other people telling them for long enough that they really should?!

No private, religious or grammar schools but lots more SEN provision both within mainstream, attached to mainstream or as specialist schools

All children would been fully assessed for SEN / ND / dyslexia / dyspraxia / dyscalculia at least 3 times during primary and secondary school

Huge public sector uplift in terms of pay, respect and status

Tasering people who spit in public, litter or don’t clear up after their dogs

Unless there’s real mitigating circumstances no one would be allowed to fully pave / tarmac their front garden: a certain percentage would have to remain planted

No plastic grass

No grey houses (glares at the 3 near me that look like some sort of witness protection buildings rather than residential homes

Free period products

I’m sure I have more!

Oh no I worded it wrong! It would be entirely their choice !!