Please help - severe insomnia and scared

[CloudyDevon]

Just been for a second night on virtually no sleep, and am really scared about what will happen. Has anyone had this happen to them? Surely exhaustion will kick in and make me sleep at some point? Whenever I try to sleep, my heart thuds. GP not much use.
Any words of experience or wisdom?
I've had worsening sleep over a few weeks, since some very stressful stuff happened.
TIA

I've not been sleeping well either, had about 3/4 hours a night for the past month but have had episodes in the past where I haven't slept at all for a few days.

The problem is that it's such a vicious circle. You're now getting stressed about not sleeping and probably full of adrenaline. Obsessing about needing to sleep stops you sleeping!

I've tried some sleep hypnosis things on YouTube which sometimes help. The best thing for me is to watch something boring on TV and just plan to spend all night watching TV and I usually eventually drop off. Avoid clock watching too.

It might also help to do something in the day to burn off the excess adrenaline like go for a run or a long walk.

Sorry to hear that you're struggling. I am too at the moment. It sucks. Just know that you're not alone and it will get better. It won't always be like this.

It sounds as though you could maybe do with talking to someone about the stressful stuff that happened before you started having trouble sleeping, maybe?

But added to that I have found that drinking kefir before bed and rubbing a magnesium and lavender lotion on my legs before bed has improved my sleep no end. I would also recommend 'this works' lavender pillow spray.

I hope that things get better for you. It's debilitating being tired.

Also look up havening - probably videos on YouTube. It's a self soothing method that has loads of science behind it. It's essentially stroking both of your arms or your face and triggers your body into making serotonin. Sometimes you have to do it for 15/20 minutes but it definitely works.

Sorry to hear you are having trouble sleeping.

Have you tried any sort of meditation as part of your bedtime routine, like Calm or Headspace apps? Or if that's not something you like then have you tried reading in bed? Magnesium may also help. I occasionally take Melissa Dreams or magnesium gummies before bed.

I have trouble eating and sleeping when I am stressed, so I understand how exhausting it can be. Sometimes I get out of bed and read rather than staying in bed as my mind starts racing and increases my anxiety levels.

Insomnia is often due to worrying about not sleeping. Am sure that a lot of depression and anxiety is down to insomnia; life can seem impossible when you're exhausted. You mention a stressful time; not eating and sleeping is normal with stress, but eventually your brain will switch off. I know when I've had a good nights sleep the world looks like a different place and I can handle anything. I usually sleep when I surrender and say 'f... it', I'll just stay awake. Sometimes I brew chamomile tea using 10 tea bags and soaking it for a couple of hours. I really am sorry and hope the stress eases and someone can give you an answer.

I struggle with insomnia and have had some dark times over the years. I got obsessed with following all good sleep hygiene tips online etc - not looking at my phone in the evenings, not watching tv in bed (despite this being how I've relaxed in bed all my life), only being in bed to sleep not just to chill.

In the end, what works consistently for me is when I'm struggling to drop off I just say to myself that I'm gonna use this as me-time - I put tv on something and almost get myself excited that I can binge a series all night. That gear shift in my mind from worrying about sleep to being happy about relaxing and spending me time releases happy hormones and takes the stress away. I will always end up nodding off about 2 episodes in.

And my insomnia was awful. Had CBT, hypnosis, sleeping pills from GP, low level ADs from GP. Literally nothing worked.

I haven't slept for 30 years .....

I have chronic insomnia, so live with it. I have recently discovered the Sleepio App and have increased from 3 hours 46 to about four hours and a quarter. You can get it free with your NHS login, I've found the exercises very useful

The balance app is working for me at the moment.

Practicing the meditation skills during the day and also listening to the sleep meditation during the day to rest.

The day time practice has allowed my mind to slow and to calm, making the night time easier... the sleep tracks and then the back to sleep track. I need to add the wake up track to stop doom scrolling in the mornings.... but one step at a time!!

I have suffered with insomnia for about 20 years now. Some nights I literally manage no sleep at all & some nights I manage 3 - 4 hours of broken sleep. I used to imagine that at some point my body would just take over and I would regain the ability to sleep naturally but that hasn't happened. I have tried every single suggestion ever made to me, but over the years it has got worse rather than better. I do worry about the long term effects, on my health because they are potentially very serious but so far I am still alive and functioning ok.

I agree with previous posters, that after a while not sleeping becomes a self fulfilling prophesy and the more that we obsess and worry and try to fix it with endless tricks and trials the more we are contributing to the problem, in a way. Having said that I have no idea how it is possible to completely disregard such a distressing and debilitating condition. The best way I have found to cope is to get up after half an hour of lying there wide awake in the dark, before I get upset and to wander around or read for a while, before returning to bed, in a more peaceful frame of mind. I am also taking Montmorency cherry & Magnesium supplements and I think these have helped a bit.

I would like to think that if you have only experienced short term insomnia, related to specific stressful events, then you have a much better chance of it being a passing phase and not a deep rooted condition. I hope this is true for you.

I've had periods of very restless sleep and I've found exercise helps me a lot. You can get workout videos on YouTube specifically designed to help with sleep, about 30 minutes long.

Agree with all who say insomnia seems to come from worrying about not sleeping…

I had very bad insomnia a few years ago . it was triggered by one night of no sleep and the. Escalated until I was worried about losing my job, ending up in a psych unit etc… didn’t sleep for 3 nights once… in the end what helped was buying an insomnia self help book… learning that the record for no sleep was 11 nights and even then the person had no ill effects… telling myself it doesn’t matter if I don’t sleep I can actually still function ok… and the kicker… if I am not asleep after 20 mins forcing self to get up and do a mindless activity.. then back to bed and try again… on repeat…

Hi OP, insomnia is such a bummer. I have the tendency. When I was at my worst like you I didn't sleep for days at a time. And I recognise the heart racing thing.
There are some good ideas on here, what worked for me was finding a sleep coach online called Martin Reed and following his advice. It was all free, it's similar to the NHS one.
For today and tonight I really can't stress enough how important it is not to nap in the day. Go for a walk to stay awake if you have to. Do as many nice things as you can, cream cakes, favourite films, whatever you can do to make your brain less focused on sleep.
In the end I discovered some of my insomnia was just that I need less sleep than most people. I'm good on 6 hours, so that is actually a bonus for me, maybe it will be the same for you. Also as a previous post says much of my sleeplessness was anxiety about sleep. If you can stop thinking about it sleep returns.
Good luck and don't nap! And don't go to bed early stay up as late as you can.

This sounds like stress and anxiety driving the insomnia. It’s horrible, I’ve experienced it.

Yes, exhaustion will eventually kick in and you will get some sleep but in the meantime…

Cut down or cut out tea and coffee and caffeinated drinks (you may have a short- term reaction, but hang in there)

Get out into bright light in the morning and during the day, take some physical exercise if you’re able, but not late in the evening.

Remove yourself from contact with the stressful issue gradually through the evening eg if it’s work stress, don’t look at work emails.

Check out ‘ sleep hygiene ‘ tips and follow those.

Work on the stressful issue or the anxiety - confide in someone, ring a helpline, write down all your worries.

If I can’t sleep I listen to audiobooks. They distract my thoughts and I often drop off.. If I don’t feel sleepy at all and am stressed, I watch TV but something very gentle and slow like a gardening programme or an art program . And have the lighting very low and move around quietly. Essentially telling the brain that this isn’t daytime, it’s a quiet time. This nearly always works after an hour or two.

Podcasts are your friend. Stick some earbuds in and find a dull podcast. There are plenty on BBC sounds. In our time, this cultural life, secret heroes.
They take your mind off whatever you are worrying about. I'm normally asleep before it has ended

Wrap yourself in a blanket, stroke your body, opposite arm with opposite hand, listen to calming music, drink herbal teas, vegetable juice, soups, repeat to yourself, I am safe. You could try eft tapping but that is better of someone can facilitate it for you.. let me know if you want me to help. I would be happy to, having just gone through something similar myself.

Why are you scared ? I have a natural sleep cycle that goes forward each day it's a total nightmare and I'm on pills almost every night. I think though this will be temporary for you

Thank you all - really appreciate the messages. I did eventually drop off after typing that, some am not operating on absolute zero.

Yes, you're all spot on - it's the fear of not sleeping which makes me not sleep. It's a horrible, horrible, cycle.

@ladyintherain my big fears are of not coping, not being able to look after the kids properly, losing my mind, psych ward, feeling like/being like this forever, etc...

I've been researching it more this morning. For those who can't quite face or don't think they'd get on well with the CBT sleep restriction stuff, it looks like there's a new alternative (based on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy instead of CBT) which looks very promising. There's an App called Sleep School which I'm going to try.

Yes, lack of sleep can really mess with you mentally. Have you seen your GP ? Sometimes they'll prescribe sleeping pills for short term use

Very interesting post.
I think in the end you have to let your worries about insomnia go, because it can literally take over your life.
I remember reading that when a sleep doctor was asked what is the secret of a good sleeper, his reply was " they just lie down put their head on the pillow and sleep,"

Codeine and wine is my go to when I am struggling to sleep🙄

What do you mean your GP isn't much use? Go back to them and ask for Zopiclone. Make your case that it's very severe insomnia. Tell the GP all the doom scenarios that are going through your head. You don't have to put up with this.

Phenergan 25mg and rain/storm noises on my bettersleep app are my go-to if i need knocking out for the night.

When i was struggling with intrusive thoughts/ PTSD i used to put the TV on after lunch and lie on the sofa wrapped in a blanket and then i could doze off for a bit. I also found the Headspace app helpful.