Is 50.00 enough

[Imnotbad]

Dd is going on holiday with my EX (not her dad) they are there for 4 night. It's all inclusive. Is 50.00 enough to give her?

Age and location and child's normal expectations

14. Butlins... she doesn't really ask for stuff

I think that's fine for all inclusive Butlins. If you can afford to, maybe up it to £75 in case they want to do a few more expensive activities. However, I think £50 is fine if food and drink is included.

Why is your 14 year old going away with your ex that is not her parent?

£100

You’re letting a 14 yo girl go away for 4 nights with an unrelated man?

Presumably he's her ex-stepdad and they have a good relationship.

My thoughts exactly. Sorry but no. ☹️

Okay so the prior comments need to chill out, my step dad was in my life from a very young age and brought me up, it wouldn't of been strange at all.

Or maybe the ex has a child themselves of similar age and they have a good relationship/friendship.

I think 50 should be enough for all inclusive, although I live near one and went on a day trip - it is expensive if you start doing ALL the little extras.

Oh well that’s ok then.

I mean...yes?

Can we assume the OP knows her ex and her own daughter well enough to decide if this is something that is appropriate or not without randomers suggesting he is a peadophile.

With butlins, food/drink is available at breakfast + dinner. Normally we make it stretch because the meals self serve and we eat LOADS, but she’ll Need snacks/drinks throughout the day, it’s not like an AI x

I'm thinking I could give her 50.00 . And tell ex to let me know if more is needed.

Because she was invited with her younger siblings .

There will be dd 14, ds 8,9 (mine and ex,)
Then his 2 adult children. She's not going alone with him

For everyone who is 🙄 at the idea of a stepdad taking a 14 year old to Butlins, you realise step parents have a legal right to ask the family court for contact with a step child if they split from the parent?

I would say £100.

That’s really lovely of him. So often you hear of ex-partners completely cutting out non-biological children in scenarios like this despite spending years living with them in a parental role. It’s great that she’s getting the same treatment as her siblings.

Back to your question: I think £50 is enough. Plenty for an ice cream, a drink and some 2ps for the arcades per day.

How lovely your blended family is. I think it's lovely that she's still part of your exs life.

Thank you. I think I will leave it at 50.00 but tell ex to let me know if more is needed.

Why does that have any thing to do with you?

Butlins is a tricky one. If it's just her spending/fun money then £50 would be enough.

If your ex is expecting you to cover the cost of her food, it will depend whether they are planning on self catering in their accommodation or eating out. Fish and chips at the takeaway are around £10 and a main course in the restaurants are £10-£15. Plus breakfast/lunch/drinks/ice cream etc, shed struggle on £50.

Plus will they do activities? The swimming is free but most other things (crazy golf, wall climbing, high ropes etc) are all payable.

I'm assuming you have a decent relationship with ex if he is taking your DD away with the others so, hopefully, he wouldn't leave her out of she didn't have enough cash and you could pay him back afterwards.

Hmmmm, if you can afford it I would chuck £75 at her @Imnotbad £50 for 4 days doesn't sound quite enough.

I think it's lovely he's included your DD. £50 is fine but tell exh if she needs more give it to her and you'll bank transfer to him when he brings her back. He might want to treat her to ice creams etc with your shared DC.

Oh ffs some of the posters!! @Imnotbad what bonkers responses to a perfectly normal question, and how lovely it is she is being included. But of course people have to jump on the 'oh he must be eeevil' bandwagon! Hope they have a great time!

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility. Mist people seem in denial that it's usually a male relative who sexually abuses children, not unknown strangers. It was a reasonable question many posters thought to ask.

Given OPs other replies, as they're not going to be alone, I would also let her go. Just because he was in her life a long time doesn't mean he is somehow "safe". That's not the defining factor otherwise birth parents would also be "safe".