What could I have done differently to save my job?

[lostandconfusedmh]

I was working at one of the Big 4 firms, but I began experiencing significant challenges after I went off my SSRIs, which I'd been on in high doses for years. The withdrawal symptoms were intense, and combined with the stress of my job, they led to me failing all six of my certificate-level exams. I felt too ill to turn up for work and struggled to perform my responsibilities properly.

During this difficult period, I was diagnosed with autism, PTSD, depression, and anxiety. My parents advised me not to disclose my mental health issues to future employers, so I only told my boss about my autism diagnosis and kept the rest to myself. My boss was skeptical and angry, questioning whether my autism alone could explain my struggles.

He even accused me of lying, saying my autism didn’t seem severe enough to cause all the problems I was experiencing. However, he did follow the Disability Discrimination Act 2010 procedure and gave me another chance.

I was then sent to Wakefield client-site to work in a credit control role, which involved making 25 calls a day, writing emails to angry customers, and liaising with a difficult client whose account management department was quite challenging. Unfortunately, this role heavily relied on social and communication skills, which are areas where I struggle due to my autism.

I made several mistakes, like canceling the wrong contracts, deleting files, accidentally CCing internal emails to customers, and even asking the client's CFO if he would renew a contract, which didn’t go over well.

On top of that, my boss was frustrated with me for missing timesheets, taking long PTOs, and working from home.

Eventually, he suggested that I leave the company. I decided it would be better to resign, and he agreed, likely to avoid any potential legal issues for the company.

The employment lawyer I spoke to told me I should have informed occupational health that I had all those anxiety disorders etc., and maybe argued with occupational health to put me off the Wakefield project and somewhere else.

This wasn't for you. You failed the exams. It not compatible and you didn't disclose your dx.

If you are unable to do a job even with reasonable adjustments, you can be fired. And if your employer doesn't even know about all your issues, they can't be expected to make the adjustments that might help. Ultimately if you aren't capable of doing what the role involves then you can't expect to stay on.

I’m afraid we simply can’t trust the Op as an accurate reporter. OP here claims to have been in client facing work in Big 4 here whilst having another thread running where they claim to have left a magic circle law firm. Oh and also claiming they are going to do TeachFirst despite feedback from prior job they need to avoid roles needing social skills. Alrighty.

I did have a law job at one of those firms, not gonna tell u which cos of anonymity issues, long story short I couldn't hack it,

teach first was the only job I could find

If you can't do client facing then teaching is 100% not for you. It's not for the faint hearted at the best of times but when you have multiple new conditions to come to terms with then it's not a good fit at all. It will destroy you and it's not fair to the pupils if you can't perform well at the moment. It's their future at stake. Maybe in the future when you're feeling stronger but not now.

As someone who lost their career due to serious mental illness; I do appreciate how you are feeling but it's very easy when you're not so well to get obsessed over details and not see the clearer picture.
Basically you need to be stable and sort out your meds before thinking about what kind of job to do. Be realistic in your expectations of yourself and for once, don't listen to your family (a mistake I made too). Your family mean well but they are not mental health or employment specialists.

I imagine OP left on a Settlement Agreement hence the employment lawyer.

OP - I think you have to be realistic about what your ideal job might look like. It sounds like the stresses and demands of Big Four accountancy practices and Magic Circle law firms are not the right environment for you.

Also apply for an Access to Work grant. Declare all disabilities, otherwise employers can’t make reasonable adjustments.

Equality Act 2010

I’ve just read your previous thread about wanting to do teaching because you think it isn’t a high stress job.

If you’ve been told that client facing jobs aren’t suitable for you, and were failing this law job because the multi-tasking was too much for you, please don’t go into teaching-the job is 100% client-facing whilst meeting deadlines, and spinning plates. It doesn’t sound like your current mental health and social communication skills will support a job in teaching.

You can still be dismissed for being unable to perform your role when you're disabled. Which you clearly couldn't in multiple ways.

As it is, you won't have Dismissed due to Capability on your record. Which is better for you for future roles.

Were you capable of doing the job before you came off your medication and failed all your exams?

Autism doesn't magic itself out of nowhere, the diagnosis shouldn't have affected your ability to do your job so your employer making adjustments to your role on that basis wasn't really necessary. You should have disclosed all diagnoses and taken time off to get medication settled.

failing all six of my certificate-level exams

I would imagine passing professional exams would have been a condition of continuing in the job. Why did you come off your long-term meds when you were doing exams?

I think it's best to focus on the future - getting you mental health managed & think about your capabilities, skills, strengths etc

It sounds like a lot of things went wrong & you made a lot of errors. Having a disability doesn't mean that you don't have to perform tasks adequately it just means your employer has to make reasonable adjustments. Overlooking misconduct is not a reasonable adjustment.

Think about what you would like to do & what would be within your ability now (rather than dream job) even if it's just voluntary work in a charity shop or paid work in a supermarket part time or perhaps retraining now you have an understanding of your disability & limitations. Alot of people who receive a diagnosis of autism as adults change career to more practical, vocational work but everyone is different.

The crucial thing here is that you can't fail exams and make repeated and numerous pretty massive mistakes and expect to be kept on because you have medical conditions. That's not how it works, and rightly so.

What are you looking to gain / achieve here? You failed all 6, were transferred, and didn't disclose all conditions.

Think about what you would like to do & what would be within your ability now

Good advice. I would strongly recommend not taking the Teach First place you have accepted starting next month-this can be brutal and it doesn’t sound like you are in the right place emotionally to embark on it.

I'm surprised that a Big 4 contract would allow someone to get as far as failing that many exams.

I think you should have been honest with work at the time about all of your health struggles. I'm sure your parents meant will in advising you not to disclose, but the reality is you were then judged for poor performance when your performance was being directly impacted but a multitude of factors.

I also think you would have benefited from a period of sick leave to seek help for your PTSD, depression and anxiety, and to come to terms with your autism diagnosis. If you were at one of the "big 4" they would presumably have had a very decent sickness policy and probably an employee assistance programme.

Moving forward, continue to seek that help and support. When you come to apply for jobs again, be honest about what happened. Explain you left because you were struggling with a coinciding mix of health problems, your performance suffered because of it and so you decided to leave (because you resigned, you were not sacked - that's important). But now you've sought help and have support in place you are ready and able to work again. Honesty is always best. A decent employer will want to support you.

OP, are you feeling pressure from your parents or putting pressure on yourself? You were on a heavy dose of SSRIs and came off them because of side effects, stigma or whatever reason. I don’t know if you tapered off them or went cold turkey but coming off SSRIs is difficult.

You then received the correct diagnosis of autism but you were also deemed unfit to do your job. Being let go from your job isn’t great, but your wellbeing is more important.

You will make mistakes in every job because you aren’t a robot, but you were very unwell and you were let go. Your parents must realise that you need time to process the diagnosis of autism and what it means in the world of work. Plenty of autistic people have jobs, but you need to find the right one for you.

If you go back to university you can apply for Disabled Students’ Allowance and get a weekly mentor. If you go into teacher training you will be under huge pressure again. You will have essays to write as well as lessons to plan and behaviour to manage.

There is no point dwelling on the past but I do realise that being autistic can make it difficult for you to have a realistic view of the future or to make decisions.

You know now that you need to disclose your autism to future employers or universities, whichever you decide to do. You are allowed to make mistakes when you’re a new graduate with a new diagnosis.

Did you and your parents have any post-diagnosis information? I worry that you are feeling pushed into getting a highly pressured job to please your parents. I could be completely wrong about this, though.

You got a 2/1 in Law so you’re obviously capable of doing assignments/passing exams. Look into the course content of each choice and base your decision on what you want to do, not what you think will yield the highest earnings.

You keep posting this. You have no recourse. But can I ask what are the initials of the firm big 4 and are you English. I am very well aware of certain big 4 practices

You weren't fired because you had disabilities, though? Disability allowances can only stretch so far, if you're actually incapable of doing the job to the required standard, you can be let go just like anyone else.
Have you spoken to your doctor about managing your medication?

This rather refects people think a diagnosis will make a difference , asd especially it probably wont.

But also that while at school we follow a path (largely unguided) to alevels and degree but noone actually says what certain jobs are like.
I followed that degree in business and hooed to get on grad scheme. But as also likely autistic i cant answer the questionairres etc and fail at interviews.
Having anxiety it can affect driving, not wanting to call people, look after other peoples kids etc.

Whilest i enjoyed uni it hasnr benefitted me job wise.

There isn’t any medication for autism, it’s not a mental illness and isn’t treatable.

Op sites coming off medication as the reason for failing her exams.
I haven't suggested that she should be medically treated for autism 🙄