Positive stories only please - overcoming bad insomnia

[YouTooU2]

Having a bad bout of it, and exhausted. Just really need some tales of hope. Please nothing negative - really need to hear good stuff.

I'm in my 40s, and it's been brought on by various life stressors.

TIA

I had this in my 40's it drove me quite demented. The answer for me was HRT, strict bedtime/get up time every day, outdoors at midday or thereabouts for at least 1/2 hour, vitamin D and Bcomplex supliments and lots of regular exercise

I sleep really well now (50's)

I read a book by someone who had been an insomniac since age 16.
He thought he was stuck with it for life until he joined some sort of cadet training at age 32/33. The early rises initially were tough and he felt even more sleep deprived. But the rigid bed time and getting up time meant, about a week or so in he started to sleep extremely well.

Routine was the answer

Thank you so much.

My routine has been truly screwed by teens with various problems over the last year, with various scheduling issues and "catch-up napes". I already do the outside and exercise bits, but timing is all over the shop. Perhaps that's where I need to prioritise.

Naps, not napes

Been through hell with insomnia. Tried many things.
What helped for me was valerian in liquid form from Rutland Dynamics, & 20mg amitryptline before bed.
Good luck.

I went cold turkey on the sleeping pills which I was taking a lot of. I got myself a hypnotherapy audio to listen to but it took a bit of trial and error and I had to find the ‘right’ one. My insomnia is linked to horrible anxiety around the kids so I found this one that said ‘nobody needs anything from you, everyone is ok’ in soothing voice and it worked

a very dear friend who is a dr said to me that evenying in bed awake is restful.

headband earphones and podcasts...

You can get past it. Try the Nothing Much Happens podcast.

Yeah, I think mine is linked to kids as well. Where did you get that track?! I've been thinking of making my own.

If your sleep schedule is all over the place, then I would focus on that first.

Really focus on sleep hygiene, making sure your bed is for sleep (or sex) and sleep (or sex) only. Lying awake? Get up & go downstairs.
Want to read? Choose a comfy armchair

I've been an insomniac since 13 & had my most severe period during a time of great stress about 4 years ago, in which I barely slept for weeks on end. These days, although not perfect, I sleep better than I have done since childhood. My other tips are:

Create a wind down routine in the evening. Mine starts from 6pm when I get home from work and start unwinding from the day with a shower & change of clothes. From about 8pm, I'll dim lights (n/a in summer obviously) and dim screens on my devices & TV. From 10pm a use a blue light filter on devices (as a nightowl I only sleep at 10 if I'm ill)

I stop drinking caffeine (only drink tea) from about 3 or 4pm, sleep experts will say stop earlier but I don't think caffeine really keeps me awake if I'm honest, it's more of a psychological thing.

I also use warm-light ulbs throughout the flat, not white-light ones and use lots of lamps / dimmer switches, which means the lighting I use layer in the evening has a lower wattage & I save white light bulbs & bright lights for task lamps. This meant I thought about how & when I used lighting.

Eat healthy.

Practice Mindfulness/meditation etc

In the morning, expose yourself to daylight as soon as you wake & make sure to spend some time outside during the afternoon, even if only 10 minutes.

A glass of milk is great for helping you to nod off. Warm if you like, I prefer cold.

Magnesium can help you drop off, too. I use herbal otc sleeping tablets.

If all else fails and you're getting desperate, ask for a short prescription of sleeping tablets to help.

And the women's meditation network podcasts are great (and free). Friend recommended them to me.

You are all helping hugely - thank you. The thing about "if you get zero sleep, you will survive" is very helpful. The pressure to sleep is horrific, isn't it?

Yes, can be.

Sometimes, if gets to the early hours and I'm still awake & restless, I take a cool or gently warmed shower to kind of reset, then start winding down again. Usually helps me get off to sleep in an hour.

I was starting to go mad with insomnia. Mix of peri-menopause, anxiety and struggling to make some big financial decisions. HRT has helped but it's taken 18 months of trying different things to get me to feeling ok. I was trying to avoid taking anything to help sleep but tried Nytol on the basis it's really just a strong antihistamine. And it works! I then bought cheap drowsy antihistamine which has a slightly diluted affect. I only tend to take a Nytol when I've had a drink or 2 (maybe once a fortnight) and then a normal anti-histamine every 3 days or so before bed. Those better nights help combat the bad ones and I genuinely do feel like I've turned a corner x

I rarely sleep more than a couple of hours and often lie awake for a good part of the night. My way of dealing with it is to listen to a soothing voice narrating a story/ podcast - it doesn’t need to be interesting, in fact sometimes I doze a bit if I’m not too engaged.

I try to lie as comfortably and still as possible and console myself that even if I’m not asleep at least my body is getting some rest. Ignore all pressure to actually sleep, it doesn’t help.

I also struggle. I had a bad phase recently and was just feeling so terrible. Then I had a night where I slept for like 9 solid hours and I felt amazing and it showed how much the lack of sleep impacts me.

I like the Calm app. They have a ‘back to sleep’ story which I really like.

I also echo really trying to not worry about it. The more I stress about it the worse it is.

I’ve struggled with insomnia all my life. The only thing that helps me is 15mg of mirtazapine at night.

I highly recommend googling the insomnia coach. A guy called Martin Reed, sign up for his free emails (or pay for his personalised serviced straight away if you want to, I never had to). I owe my sanity to the advice and guidance in those emails.

It was this one.
https://clearminds.com/products/sleep-well-tonight-hypnotherapy?_pos=1&_sid=e90806fbb&_ss=r
I don’t think I was hypnotised but the voice in my ear felt reassuring and helped drown out the late night anxiety and I pretty much always fell asleep before the end of the audio. I don’t only need to use it occasionally now

Have you tried listening to e.g. rain or wave sounds? There are some on YouTube that last for 8 hours and longer (just have to make sure there are no bloody adverts!). Good luck, insomnia is the absolute pits

Could it be peri menopause? Any other symptoms. I went a bit manic with insomnia and progesterone phase saved me. Well saved DH and DCs because I was a lunatic with only a couple of hours a night.

Can you explain about progesterone phase?

So I have had a few sort of peri symptoms and am nearly 45. However, my bloods were "normal". I have an oestrogen pump and am trying half to one pump a day because I'm so scared in case it makes the insomnia worse (which I read on possible side effects). I'm ridiculous, I know... I was told to only start thr progesterone after doing 2 pumps of oestrogen for a month

Ps you're not the ACTUAL Jane from London, are you?! (As in quizzing Starmer on radio)

Have you been to your gp about it? I would do that if you haven’t. It can have a bad effect on your mood etc. The thing about trying to add a lot of different things to your routine before bed and that sort of thing is that sometimes it can just increase the feeling of pressure to fall asleep and make things worse (but of course everyone is different).

Agree about the pressure.

And yes, I've spoken with GP. Knowing it can have a bad effect is a huge part of the problem tbh, so I try to not dwell on that