Should I tell parents if I think their daughter is autistic?

[ConcernedWorker]

So, I work at a summer camp, and I think a child I look after is autistic. I'm well versed in the presentations, and she seems to have less support needs, but I still think it's important to tell her parents about this and recommend they see a professional for more advice.

The only thing is, I discussed this with my boss, and apparently it's not a good idea. Given that we aren't actually a school, with an actual SEN co-ordinator, just a summer camp, our word holds less weight, and given his experience with this in the past, parents don't take kindly to our concerns.

So far I've done my best to make camp more accessible for the more neurodiverse kids. I give them the option of sitting out our more taxing activities, and try to help them overcome any shyness or issues to help them socialise with the others. We're working on having ear defenders and the like, but it's a bit slow going.

Anyway, my point was if there was anything I could do? I wanted to have a parent's perspective on this so any advice helps. Thanks for reading.

As a parent of 2 autistic children I wish that someone had pointed out that my eldest was autistic, but although teachers and various staff members suspected, they were not able to spell it out to me and as I am probably autistic myself I didn't pick up on their hints. Any slightly different traits my child had were not different in my eyes because, I had them too. This resulted in them not getting a diagnosis until they were 12 years old. Something needs to change as the whole pathway must have been designed by neuro typical people and isn't fit for purpose.

I'd say definitely not. I'm guessing you don't have any qualifications in this?
I certainly don't think that a holiday camp is the place for something like that.
For all you know they are currently waiting for an assessment.
Also, I'm presuming you have just met the child. Although you may get an inkling, there is no way you can tell for sure straight away. Assessments take ages!

Nooo, please don't. Even as an experienced HCP I wouldn't say this. After a detailed assessment I may recommend a referral to a neurodevelopmental pathway or pediatrician but it's within my abilities to make those referrals.

"Well versed" - what exactly does that mean ??

If this is an area you want to work in, then absolutely do the relevant training and gain the correct qualification to help identify and diagnose Autism, but you need to follow your management here, it's really not your place.

No, absolutely not. What on earth are you thinking?

Surely they’d have made the summer camp aware as they will be caring for their child ! So if they do know and haven’t said they aren’t very good parents !

Are the changes to make camp more inclusive your idea?
From my point of view if my child attended a holiday camp or whatever and required or may require ear defenders I'd make sure he had them with him. I'd be a bit bemused if someone gave them to him. Just my point of view.

I worked with children and we were not meant to say anything about this sort of thing, as that wasn't our position.

Was hard because we had several girls come through who were so blatant.

I told a couple of parents I was there 'off the clock' if there was anything there wanted to ask about, but on the whole you have to let it go.

Some folks would appreciate it but a lot of parents can be very upset about it, or in denial.

Christ, no!

Are you coming at it from your experience? No-one in the profession would just drop this in.

I really wouldn't. I have autistic children and I have worked at holiday camps and I don't think it's a good idea.

Ps for those of you saying that the child might be autistic but the parents don't have to tell the holiday camp, when my dc go to anything like that, even if the parent is staying I always get given forms to fill in including asking of my dc has a diagnosis of any SEN and if they have an ehcp.

You can talk about her struggles and adjustments that you may want to make but diagnosing her would be very unprofessional. Some people wouldl not welcome a chat like that even from a professional so definitely stay out of it. A confrontation will make things awkward at your work place.

So far I've done my best to make camp more accessible for the more neurodiverse kids. I give them the option of sitting out our more taxing activities, and try to help them overcome any shyness or issues to help them socialise with the others. We're working on having ear defenders and the like, but it's a bit slow going.

This isn't inclusive and doesn't sound as if you have much knowledge or experience of being adaptive for SEND.

So definitely don't try to diagnose without being qualified.

If there's a particular issue that warrants mentioning to parents, then that's one thing, but offering your opinion isn't necessary.

My brother and sister in law moved schools when a teacher suggested their son has high functioning autism. I'd personally keep out of it. Deep down I believe my brother and sister in law know.

Even having the idea to do this is wild. No. No. No.

Over the years a s a scout leader there has been kids that I think might present certain signs. But I stay out of it unless it actively causes danger to the other children.

I think that's a really good way of phrasing it.

FWIW, I disagree with the majority and I think it would be better to say something (using similar wording to this) but if your boss says not to, you probably shouldn't.

I have an autistic child and struggled for a long time with school (senco and teachers) not taking me seriously. When his swimming teacher made a reference to autism, it might have offended some parents but actually I found it really validating - finally someone saw what we'd been seeing.

There is always a risk that the parents don't already have suspicions and are shocked or upset by the suggestion. I think that's their problem and it's always in the child's best interests to share your observations, whether the parents like it or not - because even if they react badly to begin with, they might reflect on it in future.

It's so important for all children to be understood, and neurodivergent children in particular.

Woah, went out to get a glass of water and there's already a lot of replies. Thanks for your concern.

1. To everyone saying that it takes a long time to come to an autism diagnosis, I know. That was part of my discussion session with my boss, the fact that it hasn't been that long and not in many situations and that behaviour can vary wildly between people and places and time. However, I still thought it was important enough to bring up to him, if only to gain more than my own opinion (like I'm doing here).
2. How don't I know the parents already know? Because I've talked to her - not about autism specifically, but about school in general, and the experiences she's having. I'm not gonna say anything specific, though I also don't think talking to a parent about an autistic child if they already know would be that bad. If anything, we could start talking about ways to make the camp more accessible or easier for their daughter.
3. I think you're taking me a bit too literally. I'm not trying to diagnose her - that's why i said go see a professional, "meaning think about what i said and look into ASD" (though i guess that wasn't that obvious with my words). I don't have the qualifications for that - most of this comes from personal experiences, having worked with both low and high support needs autistic children and adults, and also being autistic myself, and while I'm currently pursuing a psychology degree I'm definitely not far enough to diagnose anyone. I genuinely just want the best for this child, please understand that.
4. To the person who said that removing her from the lesson wasn't making it more accessible; you're right. It was a temporary measure while we adapt our lesson plans - which I literally just got off a call from my boss about - but still, she should be able to have just as good a learning experience at our camp as our other students. We're currently working on it, but we do intend for our camp to enjoyable for everyone.

Thanks for your replies. I came here because I wanted to have a better idea of another perspective - thinking in other people's shoes is difficult for me, so, even with the less than stellar response, I'm glad I ask - saves me from doing something regrettable.
Hope you have a nice day.

@Squirrelsonthescaffolding the NHS advice on desensitisation is actively harmful to the autistic community and is no longer widely used.

Does that apply to ADHD too. My DC uses them to concentrate at school and DH is concerned he needs to 'get used to' distractions. I'm torn!

@ConcernedWorker

If you are interested in SEND, this is the statutory Code of Practice that must be followed by all of those working with children and young people. As professionals we don't make up the rules or do what we fancy.

You can see the depth of understanding required to follow this detailed document.
It does set out professional, parent and young person role too.

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/5a7dcb85ed915d2ac884d995/SEND_Code_of_Practice_January_2015.pdf

@Thatsnotmynose that guidance is out of date, they’re exploring the harmful effects on desensitisation to ND children and adults. The last I spoke to DS doctor about it, it’s no longer recommended to attempt desensitisation. It causes masking which leads to burnout and an over all lower coping mechanism.

Absolutely not I have three who are autistic, they are very different. Theirs a quote if you've met one autistic person you truly have only met one, even a few you can begin to diagnose in your own head.

You are not qualified to make a diagnosis or suggest one.

A MDT would be the people to do that. There are lots of things that mimic autism symptoms such as fragile X other genetic conditions and even early trauma. Only a MDT could possibly diagnose a child.

You're not wrong, but sitting out should still be an option.

Sometimes I just don't have the spoons to join in.

Can you source that please?

The SEND Code of Practice only applies to state funded education/activity providers:

local authorities (education, social care and relevant housing and employment and other services) • the governing bodies of schools, including non-maintained special schools • the governing bodies of further education colleges and sixth form colleges • the proprietors of academies (including free schools, university technical colleges and studio schools) • the management committees of pupil referral units • independent schools and independent specialist providers approved under Section 41 of the Children and Families Act 2014 • all early years providers in the maintained, private, voluntary and independent sectors that are funded by the local authority • the National Health Service Commissioning Board • clinical commissioning groups (CCGs) • NHS Trusts • NHS Foundation Trusts • Local Health Boards • Youth Offending Teams and relevant youth custodial establishments • The First-tier Tribunal (Special Educational Needs and Disability).

I don't think you're in a position to raise this @ConcernedWorker . For a start, you haven't got the resources to further support the parent if they do decide to embark on the diagnostic pathway.