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What would you do about sleeping arrangements?

50 replies

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 20:54

A group of friends in their 50s going away for 2 nights. We go away fairly often, are very comfortable with each other, due to everyone's other commitments, the exact make up of the group varies a bit.

This time we have:

John, a single man who I know well, bit of a ladies man, but not difficult to keep under control 😆

Andrew, seems nice enough but a fairly recent addition to our group. Likes a good gossip!

James, lovely man I know well, very very married, his wife is not coming.

Anne, my best friend in the group. Her husband usually joins us, so she'd share with him, but he's not coming this time.

Sarah, the person I usually share with by virtue of us being the only 2 single women.

Do we need 3 rooms or 4?

I know some people will say they don't want to share with anyone, but that's not how this group works. If I share with either Sarah or Anne, the other is going to feel left out if they have to have a room on their own, then there's the additional cost of that too.

The men will be less sensitive about it but there's still the cost issue.

So, I could let Anne and Sarah share and take one for the team by sharing with John. It would be fine, neither of us would be uncomfortable about it, I've done it before and it's never been mentioned by anyone in the group since.

I obviously can't share with James and I'm not sure about Andrew. My only concern is that John does have this reputation as a ladies man. IMO it's a reputation he's cultivated but doesn't necessarily live up to. He reckons he hasn't has sex in nearly 3 years! Anyway I'm not worried about him, I've shared with him before and it was fine, but no one made a song and dance of it and no one who wasn't on the trip knows. This time we have gossipy Andrew.

The money isn't the biggest issue, it wouldn't stop anyone going, but there's a choice to be made about who gets the single, more expensive rooms iyswim.

WWYD?

OP posts:
MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:05

What sort of establishment? hotel or lodge or something?

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:07

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:05

What sort of establishment? hotel or lodge or something?

Hotel

OP posts:
Lamelie · 18/07/2024 21:09

Youth hostel? You can get two single sex sole occupancy rooms- three in each.

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:10

How strong is the risk of John or Andrew getting a bit fresh? Can't say I'd be happy sharing a small hotel room with bathroom with a man. Very little privacy for toilet matters. Is there not a family room option (double and a pull out bed)?

DatingDinosaur · 18/07/2024 21:11

Personally I'd let Anne and Sarah share a room and get one on my own and fork out the extra for the privilege.

But I like my own space and to shut the world out when I've finished being social.

Sounds like you want to share with John so go for it. He can tell everyone how he bunked up with you for the evening and your clarifications that he doesn't mean "like that" will just add fuel to the fire and everyone will assume you've been shagging like rabbits regardless of the truth.

Of course, if you want to shag like rabbits...

BobbyBiscuits · 18/07/2024 21:15

I'd assume, So all men together, all women together, or anyone who objects can have their own room?
I guess it depends how keen each person is on sharing. Assuming I wouldn't expect men and women to share unless they actively chose to.

I had a works trip, and I made a faux pas when I immediately chose to share with the one gay man in the group, leaving one woman to either share with a bloke or awkwardly bunk up with the two other women who didn't really like her!
So it can be a minefield. Haha.

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:16

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:10

How strong is the risk of John or Andrew getting a bit fresh? Can't say I'd be happy sharing a small hotel room with bathroom with a man. Very little privacy for toilet matters. Is there not a family room option (double and a pull out bed)?

John has the nickname Mr Tickle because he gets a bit handsy after a drink but he also is very easy to say no to, as he should be. I don't have any concerns on that front. If I have any concerns it's only about the gossip among our wider circle if they hear about it at home.

I've looked for somewhere with triple rooms and they don't seem to exist in the area.

OP posts:
FloordrobeIsGoingToGetME · 18/07/2024 21:18

God, no one should be 'getting a bit handsy' after a drink, OP.

Feels a bit odd that you laugh that off.

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:19

DatingDinosaur · 18/07/2024 21:11

Personally I'd let Anne and Sarah share a room and get one on my own and fork out the extra for the privilege.

But I like my own space and to shut the world out when I've finished being social.

Sounds like you want to share with John so go for it. He can tell everyone how he bunked up with you for the evening and your clarifications that he doesn't mean "like that" will just add fuel to the fire and everyone will assume you've been shagging like rabbits regardless of the truth.

Of course, if you want to shag like rabbits...

🤣 busted

No, it's not that I want to share with John, but I have no objection to sharing with John. When we shared before he used the toilet in the lobby for the post breakfast clearout...and the fact that I know that demonstrates how comfortable we are together.

He's an attractive man my age (53), which makes me 15 years too old for him 😆

OP posts:
MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:20

FloordrobeIsGoingToGetME · 18/07/2024 21:18

God, no one should be 'getting a bit handsy' after a drink, OP.

Feels a bit odd that you laugh that off.

I know right!! Why would you want a friend that may grab your arse when he's had a drink. A bit creepy. OP, maybe stick him with James and have a punt on Andrew.

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:21

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:20

I know right!! Why would you want a friend that may grab your arse when he's had a drink. A bit creepy. OP, maybe stick him with James and have a punt on Andrew.

He's completely harmless and hasn't done it to me since I told him to stop, probably 2 years ago.

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 18/07/2024 21:23

We’ve booked hotel rooms before for 3 people to share. Is that an option?

StormingNorman · 18/07/2024 21:24

I would go for four rooms and you and John have one each. Personally, I wouldn’t mind sharing with a male friend that close and I would put Gossipy Andrew back in his box if he tried to say anything silly. But I do understand why you wouldn’t want to deal with that!

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:24

TeenLifeMum · 18/07/2024 21:23

We’ve booked hotel rooms before for 3 people to share. Is that an option?

I've looked but it doesn't seem to be an option in this spot.

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 18/07/2024 21:26

Make a WhatsApp poll and ask the group their preference.

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:28

TeenLifeMum · 18/07/2024 21:26

Make a WhatsApp poll and ask the group their preference.

And have the single guys fight over which lady they get to share a room with?

rookiemere · 18/07/2024 21:38

Can't you share with James ?
He's married and therefore unlikely to try any moves if he usually does this holiday with his DW.
I mean it all sounds like hell and I would just pay the extra for a single or see if the ladies could get a triple room, but I'd be reluctant to share a room with a known handsy ladies man.

Runbunny · 18/07/2024 21:44

rookiemere · 18/07/2024 21:38

Can't you share with James ?
He's married and therefore unlikely to try any moves if he usually does this holiday with his DW.
I mean it all sounds like hell and I would just pay the extra for a single or see if the ladies could get a triple room, but I'd be reluctant to share a room with a known handsy ladies man.

I'd be very comfortable with James, but there's no way I'd do that to his wife.

OP posts:
LibertyDuck · 18/07/2024 21:50

Why exactly can't everyone just have their own room? Just pay up and save the stress.

rookiemere · 18/07/2024 21:51

Actually I think you're overthinking this. You usually share with Sarah as you are both single ladies, so I would have thought the assumption would be that you would share again. Anne normally shares with her DH and he isn't going so would assume she would have her own room.

Definitely 4 bedrooms unless you can get a couple of triples.

AppleKatie · 18/07/2024 21:55

I would get own rooms. And if I couldn’t afford that I wouldn’t go.

MakeMeAirtight · 18/07/2024 21:57

What sort of a holiday is it anyway? If I was Anne's husband I;m not sure I'd be happy her going away with 2 potentially lecherous men.

JC03745 · 18/07/2024 22:01

5 adults = 5 rooms IMO!
Then no one feel compelled to share with someone else if they'd really prefer not to but can't say. You clearly want to share with John, so just say that you guys are sharing! Crickey- you guys are in your 50's!

BettyBardMacDonald · 18/07/2024 22:04

John sounds crass and icky.

Why can't each person get a room to themselves?

No way I'd share a room in middle age.

mitogoshi · 18/07/2024 22:05

Ask if they have triple rooms!

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