Why are people so territorial over parking?

[IndigoIgloo]

I was visiting my mother today who has had a lot of problems with her neighbours in the past about parking, etc. It's an over 50's area so lots of the neighbours are elderly and have quite 'busy body' mentalities.

It's all on street parking. No one has allocated spaces. I parked up and was unloading some things from my car when a elderly man pulled up next to me and asked me how long I was going to be.

I was confused as there was a large empty space right behind my car so no issue with not being able to park. I said I'd just arrived so wasn't leaving yet. He said "don't I think he should have the right to park in front of his house?"

I said not really as it's a public road without allocated parking so anyone can park anywhere.

He drove off down the road so I continued unloading my car, looked up and he'd turned round and driven back and was waiting in the road watching me. I ignored him, carried on with what i was doing. Next thing is he's gotten out of his car and come over to ask how long I'm going to take. I said again, I'm not leaving yet.

Again he said he should have the right to park in front of his house. I said ok so park in front of your house?? There is a space RIGHT THERE behind my car, next to his house. He said no, I want to park THERE pointing to where my car was. I told him he was just being difficult. He said I'm 91 and have paid £1400 towards the road being fixed, you can go and park somewhere else.

Then proceeded to tell me how he and the rest of the neighbourhood don't like my mum to which I replied "well that's the real reason you're doing this then isn't it? You wouldn't be so quick to tell your other neighbours guests to move would you?"

I was about to tell him that I'd move elsewhere just so he'd shut up about it but before I could start he called me an ignorant cow so I said if you're going to insult me I'm won't do you any favours and walked off to my mums house.

Watched him from her house and he parked in the space behind my car and reversed into the back of my car while he did it.

But seriously, what is it about parking that sends people nuts like this?! Fair enough if I'd parked on his drive or allocated space but it's literally a roadside and there was plenty of other space available.

@WearyAuldWumman Calling the police! How ridiculous. 🙄
I felt the same. That he wouldn't have dared say anything of it had been my other half who was visiting that day.
In my mum's case they see a woman on her own and decide she's an easy target. If she had a husband with her I'm sure she wouldn't have had half the trouble she's had.

My poor mum's car has been key'd down both sides repeatedly. She's had 6 punctured tires, all mysteriously by nails. Obviously can't prove that it's any of the neighbours but I wouldn't put it past them.
Madness. Fancy keying someone's car because you feel entitled to park on that spot of the road.

That's so awful, they are so mean to your mum! There's no way 6 nails is all accidental. Terrible.

Agree

I was enjoying reading this thread until the ageism started.

He paid £1400 to get the road fixed? Is it a private road then? In which case he may have a point. He could get a disabled space marked out outside his house, perhaps.

I used to live 2 doors up from a knob like that. It's not an age thing he was young. He knocked on my front door more than once to get me to move as I'd parked outside his house. In these cases a space had become free outside my house which he refused to park in even though he'd be able to see his car from his house.
He actually said to me once "I didn't pay £50k for a car not to be able to park it outside my house" WTF.?
I told him he should have bought a house with a drive then. This was a terraced street of 2 up 2 downs, with only on road parking. Not the place to live if you are that precious about your car.

Please help your mum to move house if at all possible. This sounded at first like a one-off batshit parking argument, but your updates make clear there has been significant harassment and criminal damage.

The police won't give a damn about the parking but she should report the harassment (and also have a plan to get out of there).

I'm so sorry. Cars and parking bring out the worst in people

If it is a private road then the OP's mum has also presumably contributed.

He didn't have a point, he's just an obnoxious git. I have a neighbour who's very territorial about parking. Life is too short.

“He could get a disabled space marked out outside his house, perhaps.”

He could get an ‘ENTITLED’ space outside his house…

I am unclear on whether it's a private road or not. There is a mix of privately owned houses and housing association. The housing association are the ones that are age restricted to over 50s. I believe there has been some kind of argument with the council over repairing potholes in the road and that the privately owned houses ended up paying to have it done. I'm unaware if the housing association contributed to it too.

I really wish I could help my mum move but she's housing association and they have banded her as band E (adequately housed) so she can't bid on other properties to move to. They've said the only chance she has of moving is through a mutual exchange but that is proving next to impossible as the age restriction prevents anyone younger than 50 who might be interested and also the fact that it's an old property with night storage heaters puts a lot of people off.

You're so right. One little disparaging comment about how everyone over 50 is an interfering trouble maker, and you're accused of "ageism". It's ridiculous.

Could that be the crux of your mum’s problems @IndigoIgloo , the fact that your mum lives in a HA property, I’m assuming he privately owns?
So he’s an entitled snob who displays bullying behaviour.

I’d look into installing dashcams that can record whilst the vehicle is stationary.
Even if it doesn’t pick up enough detail of deliberate sabotage (nail punctures, keyed scratches) it might act as a deterrent.

It's not all to do with age, I dropped my DD at a club once. The sorts centre had its own carpark but it was inadequate for the number of activities happening at one time.
So I parked on a nearby residential street, making sure I didn't block anyone's drive, and there were no restrictions. A man (30s or 40s) came out of his house, and insisted I couldn't park there. I said that as there were no restrictions and I hadn't blocked a drive i thought was OK. He said he was expecting visitors and thats where they were going to park, and that he would Call the police.
When I got back about an hour later, he had parked another vehicle about 5" away from my car. And he was standing in the doorway watching me do 80 little back and forth to get the car out of the space. I was sweating like I'd run 5k but I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of a) hitting the car behind or b) asking him to move it!

My sister is like this. She has a driveway for two cars. I drove 200 miles to see her and she flew out of the house to get me to move as her DD likes to park where I had just stopped.

There's residents' on street parking where I live no allocated spaces. A neighbour with a drive made a tinkly comment about how she loves my cute car and how I should park it in front of her house if there's a space free. I do just that. But I notice in the 5 minutes it takes me to go to the shop she'll move her car into the space even though she has a drive.

Interestingly my sister thinks that I shouldn't park outside my neighbour's house.

I think it starts with wanting to park outside their house for convenience and having something so valuable close to hand, even though that won’t prevent damage or theft.

That morphs into a sense of entitlement because it has become a habit. Before you know it they think they have a right to that space on the road and no logic will sway them. They just become argumentative idiots.

This is social snobbery I suspect. Ring doorbell/dashcam - so the person damaging the car can be identified and reported.

You should've taken photos and reported it to your insurance.

Even if it doesn't look like there is damage there is sometimes unseen damage. And even if there's not, he still hit your car.

People are so strange over parking. I have a driveway but our household has three cars so one has to be parked on the road. Sometimes we get lucky and are able to park in front of our house, others not and have to park further down the road. Sometimes if busy we have to park in a different road to ours. I don't have a problem with anyone parking in front of my house as I own the house and not the road.

A neighbour has a motorhome which never seems to move and despite having a driveway parks this motorhome on the road. It is right on the junction and you can't see around it clearly to go around it. He admits he does that to stop people parking outside of his house. Complete madness!

Yes we have this too, people parking directly in front of our gate & then if we dare to park next to the gate they literally block us in. So antisocial. I'm thinking of being equally as antisocial & putting up a bird feeder right next to where they park & hopeful that the seagulls will shit all over the car.
Seriously I sympathise with you. It's a nightmare & people are so weird. I'd report though, reversing into your car & name calling is alarming, it's harassment & your mum shouldn't have to put up with it. It's old fashioned misogyny

He said I'm 91 and have paid £1400 towards the road being fixed, you can go and park somewhere else.

Residents don’t pay to repair public roads. Sounds like a private road.

It’s possible that he only feels comfortable parking in that spot - he knows when to turn the wheels and what the car is lined up against. I’m not sure there are many great and confident 91 year old drivers.

Except she wasn't talking about someone being elderly at 50 🙄

I do generally totally agree with you but be aware that if he has just paid £1400 towards road maintenance it may not be a public road, especially if it is on an over 50's estate, therefore the rules may not be the same. It's worth checking your mothers information to see what the rules on parking are.

In my road it starts with someone new moving in. They park their work van outside someone's house, then that person parks in front of someone else and its a domino effect. Then someone will park over 2 spaces and that makes the problem worse etc etc. However when everyone just parks in the same place every day, life is easy.

Parking next to his house isn't the same as parking in front of his house. I'd be pretty miffed if I couldn't park directly in front of my own house. But then again, I'd ensure that I have my own driveway.

I never parked on the road opposite my DC's primary school I used a Park and walk scheme but I heard tales of a couple who would go nuts if anyone parked outside their house there.
One day DS was coming back from a Residential at 2.30 so I parked on the road (Park and Stride not open until 3), unknowingly outside "that house". The woman came out and told me to move as her H was due home and would want to park there, I said no as I was parked legally and safely on a public road and walked off.
I got back to my car and it wouldn't start!! She came out of her house to tell me to move again and I explained I couldn't, her H then arrived and double parked next to me to tell me to move and again I explained I couldn't. For the 2 hours while I waited for The AA they both stood in their front garden chuntering at me.
Word got out and The Head, School Caretaker and a couple of parents turned up to "check on me" but actually to enjoy the arseholes distress - The Head actually said she was sorry it happened to me but it had made her week. Another neighbour came out and offered a cuppa and asked if me or DS needed the loo or anything else.
Mrs Arsehole was VERY active in The local area FB group that evening.