Hating comments about my body!

[MotherOfOlafs]

Hi all

Early this year I had a bit of a health scare and decided the best thing for me was to lose weight in the hope of possibly reversing some of my issues. Anyway I’ve been really focused and lost a fair amount so far, all good, I definitely feel better health-wise. But now it seems family and friends think it’s fine to comment on my body and appearance. I’ve had things said to me such as ‘wow you look loads better now!’, ‘ooh you’ve finally got ankles!’, ‘why are you still wearing your big-girl clothes?!’ etc.

I was self-conscious when I was big and if I’m honest I feel more so now. I don’t know what to wear and nothing feels right. This new interest in my body makes me very uncomfortable and any time I’ve made it clear I’m not happy about the comments it’s met with ‘but it’s a compliment!!’. I’m just unsure how to handle it I guess.

I totally am with you OP and contributed to a similar thread a while back (will try to find for you).
Its hugely tactless at best and normalises diet culture and valuing thinness/appearance over character. I hear "You're a better person that you were a year ago" when people say stuff like this to me. I've had all sorts of clangers from "you look so much more professional now" to "its great to see you finally taking pride in your appearance". As well as the well meaning "I have to say [do you, do you really?!] you look great, what's your secret ?" (From someone sized 8 who clearly doesn't need my advice).
I don't know the answer OP. I did once lose it a bit at a colleague and remark how personal it is, how it ultimately came from a place of pain and that why would she think I would want to discuss it in a group situation, but I know she meant well and I did later apologise.
Occasionally I answer "I've lost weight because of extreme stress" (partly true) and every single time has been met with either laughter (!) Or some silly unthinking remark like "Oh I wish I could use weight with stress" [I'm thinking "what you want to have a realy shitty experience, develop severe panic attacks, anxiety and an eating disorder because you fancy dropping half a stone"].
I cannot embrace it no matter how many people tell me to be more gravity. I often just don't answer and change the subject totally, a few people got the message that way.

*gracious not gravity 😂
Here's the thread: