Have you ever told a crush about your feelings?

[F0B]

I'm married and I won't do anything with them but I just feel like I want them to know?
I won't tell them, I know it's wrong but I sort of fantasise about them knowing how much I care and think about them.

Anyone told? What happened?

No I have never told them - I was in that situation big time back in 2010 and still absolute adore the person even now. I didn't dare say anything and in a way really regret not doing so. Its far too late to say anything now all these years later. I have a great platonic friendship with this person and was scared or ruining it by revealing my true feelings.

If I could turn back the clock then I would!

Are you planning to stay married? If so, why tell the object of your affections about your feelings? Unless you’re hoping he or she reciprocates them?

Fairly certain Greg Davies wouldn’t be interested, so, no.

I did. I was very drunk and we were in a very loud club and I pray to god he didn't hear me.

He was my boss at the time and the team were all out on our xmas party night out.

I'm sure me getting transferred to another department a few months later had nothing to do with this...

Twice no and thank fuck I didn't. Both were crushes, one of a friend's husband.
I avoided seeing them, the feelings were strong. But completely meaningless. I now look back and cringe as firstly I find them quite unattractive and secondly I would be so gutted to have ruined my family.

And also would have lost my friend. I now see them and feel absolutely nothing.

Yes I did. Been together 10 years and have 2 kids now.

@GrandTheftWalrus that's cute!

@F0B it's normal to have a crush married or not, just don't tell him!

Yes I do have a crush, we're both single. He makes me smile when he messages like today. He is very polite towards me and takes my teasing well. It's me being flirty 😆

We would never date as we live too far apart but I enjoy the contact.

Yes I did and been happily married and many kids and years later still very happy lol

my crush is currently engaged and from what i gather even if single im guessing it would be almost worthy of an mi5 mission to achieve a chance at a relationship / fling

Yes I did, it turned out he was gay! And we were both 13 at the time....
As a married woman, absolutely not and I definitely wouldn't. What are you hoping to achieve by telling them?

I really want to. It would be nearly impossible for anything altogether come of it. But I value him and knowing him very deeply. Plus, I did something a bit special for him, so if he hasn't guessed by now ... married but meh about staying that way ...

I would only do so if there was something I wanted to achieve.

When I was single, yes. Whilst married, no.

NC for this. I did. A close friend's husband. He was clearly very attracted to me, I to him - I just couldn't take it anymore. I rang their doorbell one day when I knew she was out at work and told him that while I knew nothing could ever happen between us I just wanted a bit of normality in how we were around each other rather than odd situation we'd gotten ourselves into. It worked, broadly. I doubt I'd ever do it again but I don't regret it.

As in, I also told him that I was in love with him, and he knew it.

@sunstarsmoondisaster your friend never found out? 😮

No. It's three years on, she still doesn't know afaik (unless he told her, but that is quite unlikely). We don't see much of each other now as they moved away.

I wouldn’t tell him. What happens if he reciprocates your feelings?

As a married woman I don't really get crushes. I see people I might be attracted to in thr moment but it's never developed to crush status. I only have my crush on an actor I'll neber meet, so thats a " safe" crush. If it was a guy in normal life though, I wouldn't say anything. All crushes have their day and it will fade sooner or later. In the future looking back, you'll probably feel relieved you didn't say anything.

That's interesting. My crush is not close by. So were the feelings reciprocated?

My rational self knows that these feelings eventually fade but this one has been going on for three years now!

I wonder if them being far away contributes to the unavailability perhaps.

No, I never did. He tried to talk to me about it a few times, and we occasionally would hold hands for a minute or similar. So he knew, and I knew, but to have the conversation would have been too difficult and risky.

It still makes me sad tbh.

What's your marriage like OP? Do you hope your crush will reciprocate and your relationship will become a reality?

Well my H didn't tell someone as far as I'm aware- but wrote it all down- all of which I found many years later stuffed in a drawer and he had forgotten about-and for me it utterly killed 'the special'

I would say we can all feel like this but unless you intend to do something about it or are single it don't givesshit about your partner - keep it strictly in your head.

We have a good marriage. But it's been a long one, 27 years. I guess sometimes I just get restless. Never been unfaithful or told previous crushes.
I'd like not to have the crush.
I suppose a small part of me would love to hear them say they feel the same. But then never do anything about it.