Please tell me your weird/crazy neighbour stories.

[shhquietplease]

I have two bins (my basement used to be a flat) and I’ve never used both and I’ve put a makeshift lock on one but you can still open the lid a tiny amount.

It was empty and I’ve put it far back on the property. Went to move it today and found bags of dog poo in it. It’s not anywhere near the pavement! So someone has snooped around and repeatedly put their dog poo in it.

I had one weird lady (we have houses with the same layout) kept coming over to ask to look around my house as I’d changed the standard layout when I renovated it. Fine the first couple of times but by the third time it was just odd.

@EmmaJane2025 - No it was definitely him because he had 2 recycling bins behind his gate (down the side of his house) and they both had numbers on (his and mine). He filled it up and put it out 2 weeks later. He constantly sought my attention.

No bloody clue

I'm always puzzled by the posters who say that the weird/crazy neighbour messaged them! Why on earth do they give these people their phone numbers in the first place?! The only neighbour who has my phone number is the lady who lives opposite me,and I only gave it to her after we'd known each other for 2 years.

Some years ago. Our house was part of a terrace and each house had a front garden and a back garden/yard or drive with shed/garage. The terrace ended with a small road running front to back (think of an inverted U with the houses in the middle to allow access. A couple further along from us would move stuff from eg shed to front garden not thro the house but around the U. Watching a set of ladders being carried back to front to back was amusing but I sort of see why. However, they had a pan catch fire and when the fire brigade arrived the firemen were made by the wife to go around the U NOT thro the house, even tho the pan was blazing away. Always wondered what the front room/hallway were like since use of them seemed forbidden

First set of weird neighbours used to get furniture donated from a charity, use it for 6 months then burn it all in the garden and get more furniture.
They had a huge screaming argument with a relative one weekend, and the wronged relative shat in the middle of the cul de sac turning circle.
We moved and the new neighbours were much less batshit, but far more petty.
They objected to the colour we’d painted our side of the front boundary fence, so they took the panels out and spent a month power washing and paint stripping most of the colour out. They objected to the state of the street gutters in front of our house and demanded that we weed them by hand once a month so seeds didn’t blow into their garden from the road. I think they wanted a fight so I just smiled at them whenever I saw them, it only took 5 years to break them with relentless cheerfulness. Eventually they moved and our current neighbours are lovely.

Many years ago, a neighbour 2 doors down built a coffin in his garden. He wore a t shirt proclaiming ‘Jesus is a cunt’ which horribly offended the lady who lived between us, she was in the Salvation Army.

Oddly, a family member’s neighbour’s friends brought round a coffin when she was out one day and it’s semi buried upright in the garden. Very odd.

I’ve written about my violent neighbour previously. He was on drugs, lost his job due to drink/drugs, used to throw his girlfriend across the lounge. When we politely asked him to lower his music one night, he punched me in the face. He then played music so loud it was just distorted, 7pm-7am for a year. Total cunt. We spent a fortune staying out of the house. When he heard that my Dh was joining the police, he told us we’d better bloody move. We did, eventually, having declared everything to the estate agent. The police and environmental health were round frequently. The poor next door neighbours who’d been there forever moved before us.

Apart from painting a goal on our house wall and kicking a football against it, repeatedly flooding our cellar because their drains were damaged and leaving nappies on their front step that blew into our front garden. Apart from that they are lovely

My downstairs neighbour has been sectioned for the third time, she was obviously let out too soon the first two times. It's blissfully quiet.

She basically cannot live alone because she stops taking her medication.
And then goes crazy.

I do feel sorry for her that she has such awful psychiatric problems. But safety before everything. You never know how they will react....

She's been known to throw mugs full of coffee at neighbours on the street.

We've had 5 police here for at least 3 hours to try to get her to open her front door.

They finally got the brainwave to get a locksmith in. 🙄

However, they had a pan catch fire and when the fire brigade arrived the firemen were made by the wife to go around the U NOT thro the house, even tho the pan was blazing away.

Can't imagine the fire brigade here would take a blind bit of notice of some batshit woman telling them how to do their job..... they would just pass her by into the house. Can't imagine her standing up to a bunch of those heroes!

A new neighbour knocked with some apples from her employers tree, a bargaining chip to use my oven as hers was broken. She wanted a leg of lamb slow roasted and did I have any thyme to sprinkle on it. A bit CF as we'd never met but no real problem for me. A week later she knocked my door, saying she thought I'd have at least made her employer an apple pie, considering she'd given me so many apples!!!

I used to live outside the Uk in a big English speaking city. I lived in a flat that faced out the back side of a 4 story block of flats. There were probably 4-5 of these blocks on the street so I could see the back gardens of all of them. Neighbour 2 gardens down used to sit out in his ground floor garden and listen to BBC world service at FULL F-ING VOLUME every Saturday and Sunday between 5-8am. 🥴

At the time, I was in my mid 20s and I was out until 2-3am a lot of weekends. I would come home, shower, crash into bed (drunk) and then 2 hours of sleep later, bloody BBC world service for the entire neighbourhood to hear. 😩 Every Saturday and Sunday 5am on the dot. Even ear plugs didn’t block it out.

I was mostly just annoyed and trying not to vomit because I was like 24. But now, decades later, I actually wish I’d tried to find out why the hell he did this every week. Only on the weekends. Always at freaking 5am. Always incredibly loud.

Our neighbour was dancing in the garden with a 7ft decorative scarecrow last weekend 😀

The first property we bought was a flat, the seller neglected to tell us the reason he was selling was a falling out with the upstairs neighbours who owned a huge Rottie called Saturn. New upstairs neighbour told us everything when we moved in, including how they had a physical altercation before we bought the place.

Luckily it was the seller who was the problem, our new neighbours were ok. The worst we had was that Saturn took to wresting our green wheelie bin, and I regularly had to retrieve him from standing in the road where he would be standing staring down cars and stopping traffic. People were scared of his huge size and that he was a Rottie, but he was lovely, never used to even bark.