I've been left with a 4yo

[raysan]

A close friend asked me to babysit their 4yo at my house so they could have a spontaneous night out. She'd do it for me and I love her kids, so was happy.

However.... last contact was 12.30am and her phone has been off since at least 5am. I dropped her kid at nursery after checking she was not at home. Why would he phone be off?? And if it was, why would she not come home so I could find her?? We don;t have mutual friends. Waiting for a text back from her teenager (who will probably sleep all morning), who at least has her sister's number.

When would you start to call hospitals???

It's a one off so I will forgive her, if she is just sleeping off a hangover but will be clear this is a one time free pass

What was the arrangement for this morning?
Were you meant to be taking the child to nursery?

Why did you call her at 5am if you were babysitting overnight?

What type of night out was it? Was it a date? Was she meeting friends? What is 4 year old normally collected?

Was she meant to come and pick them up from yours last night or this morning?

Was the arrangement to have her child overnight?

What were the babysitting arrangements?
Overnight? Collection time? ...

Was it a misunderstanding? Like she thought you agreed to have DC overnight and therefore do the nursery drop and she’ll pick him up afterwards? If it was at your house she surely wasn’t planning on picking the kid up at midnight when he was asleep in bed? Although clearly some major communication issues I reckon chances are she’s having a lie in and will pick up from nursery as normal later.

the plan was that she would pick him up at 11pm on her way home (he asked for this and would have been fine being picked up late). He was asleep, so I texted her not to rush. Called her at 12.30 and we agreed he would sleep over.

Normally I drop him back at hers when I do the school run, so I was not supposed to take him to nursery.

Am trying not to be frantic, hoping she is just asleep. nerves will fray as the hours go on...

Called her at 5am as her kid was upset and wanted to talk to her. Didn;t expect she would pick up, but that is how I know her phone was off at that point

You went to her house this morning before nursery and she wasn't there. Yes I would be very concerned if she didn't have form for this.
Do you know who she went out with?
I would call the police.

I would have rung the police at 5am - this child had been abandoned.

This ^^

If you checked at the house this morning before dropping him off and she wasn't there then I can't understand why you wouldn't have contacted the police?

How very strange. Is she normally a real partier??

It would depend on which friend tbh. What time would he usually finish nursery today??

Did you actually go to her house before nursery, or just try ringing? And the teen didn't answer the door either?

Do you know where she was going/who with?

Is this the one who ditched her kid for a festival?

I don’t think I would call the police yet. She knew the child was staying at yours, she might have slept elsewhere. I’d worry if she doesn’t contact you at nursery pick up time

Has she gone out with someone known to her? I’d be calling her family, waking her teenage daughter up to get details of family asap

No, its her 2nd/ 3rd night out since the little one was born

Your friend was going to collect her 4yo at 11pm? On a Wednesday night?

And the kid was awake at 5am asking to speak to his mum?

I'm going to have a wild guess this isn't the first time the child has been dumped on someone so mum can go out on the piss.

So it was agreed he’d stay over, even if that was last minute but still worrying that she hasn’t surfaced yet. How do you know she’s not at home? If you knocked and her teen slept through it then maybe she did too if she was really drunk. I would wake the teen if you can though and see if anyone knows who she was with.

Have you given nursery your contact in case she doesn't collect?

Did she say she was home when you last spoke?