“Babes in arms” - what age would you say this is?

[SteakSteak]

We’ve got a wedding invite for this summer addressed to just me and DH. Obviously is just us and not our DC - more than happy with that. However, DC2 is 8 months old (will be 9.5mo at the wedding) is absolutely refusing a bottle.

what age would you deem ‘babes in arms’?

so not to drip feed:
To add to the faff - DC2 has CMPA so we’re trying to introduce special formula.

DH and I are also on holiday at the time of the wedding. We’re flying back and meant to be leaving both kids with family members aboard. I’ve no issue - other than she’s refusing a bottle. If I had to bring her, just wondering if I could. Although I would feel terrible leaving our toddler.

Obviously, I know the answer is to ask but just wanted to gauge opinions before going through all of it, if it becomes a non-issue.

I would assume under 6 months, I don’t know why! Possibly because around 6 months they have maybe started to eat some solid food?
No idea
I wish wedding invites just said out and out either all welcome or no children under 10 or whatever - just be explicit!

Have they said ‘babes in arms’ are invited to the wedding?

Under two, on a lap.

0-6 months would still be babe in arms IMO

Does the invite even say babes in arms is fine or are you assuming?

A baby who can be held on a lap the whole time, no buggies or high chairs needed, and not crawling.
For my 5 month old who crawled she was far more chaotic than my other two were at 9months because she didn't sit nicely once she could move

Do you mean under two months because two year olds run junior park runs of 2km at the weekends where I live. There is nothing at all baby like about a two year old.

Wow, this bride and groom must be out of this world special to get you back from your holiday and leaving your kids there. I wouldn't do that for anyone! Esp with an 8 month old who won't take a bottle.

Oh gosh. We have similar. V close family and invite says babies in arms. Ours will be 10months so thought we would be ok. Rest of family also saying how much they are looking forward to see baby at wedding as he is the only grandchild. Will have to clarify but might have some very disappointed relatives if he's too old to go to wedding . ( also aware that I don't want baby taking attention away from bride)

I agree. I think 12 to 24 months would be the worst at a wedding.

I didn't say they were a baby. I would take it to mean babies and toddlers on laps, under two as on a plane. Not needing their own seat or meal as the parent can bring food or share their own.

Under two doesn't include two year olds.

So bottle fed babies are never babes in arms?

Up to six months, but if baby is not on the move (crawling, walking) there could be some flexibility. I would ask especially as you are cutting your holiday short!

You can't eat with a nearly 2 year old on your lap, they would need a highchair and therefore a place at the table. Nor would you be able to share a meal with them at that age, at any wedding I've ever been to there simply wouldn't be enough food for you and the child.

I would say a babe in arms is no older than 6 months if not younger.
I know all babies are different but generally speaking at 9 months old most but not all will be crawling and many are taking first steps. Does the invitation say babes in arms?
If they can move about independently then they are not a babe in arms.

I took my DD (17m) to a theatre show at Southbank Centre and they were admitted free as a babe in arms, all babies under 18m are considered babes in arms.

My eldest was immobile till around 14months and then only bum shuffled, so not sure being immobile is the right discriminator there. I’d say under 6months, not eating real food etc.

A child that is in the slightest bit mobile, is NOT a babe in arms.

Yes you can, I regularly ate with a baby or toddler on my lap, and shared food. I would not expect an under two to be given a meal of their own, I would bring food for them or share.

You must have had incredibly chilled out toddlers. There's no way any of the children I know would have happily sat on a parents lap at nearly 2 without half the meal and table decor ending up on the floor.

Not really 'chilled out', no. Very alert, loved events and looking around at everything.

I would say a baby that doesn't need any catering for including high chair etc . If they are under a year and can't be left then I think they could fit into the 'babies' demographic.The bottle is a red herring at 9 months as baby will be eating food and can have water from a beaker .There is no need to complicate life with breast fed babies by introducing bottles.

It’s a baby who isn’t yet crawling or trying to walk. So needs to be carried ‘in arms’ - or once had to be for most people, before they all had prams or pushchairs - like a GGM of mine, 10 children and no pram. 😱

I agree babies that aren’t crawling yet. My DS is 10.5 months and not crawling yet. My DD was crawling at this age though. So you probably wouldn’t know until nearer the time.

Just explain the situation to them. They must be close to you if you’re leaving your holiday for the wedding.