Whats your worst personality trait / character flaw?

[jlox]

Im too sensitive and can be quite insecure in certain situations 🥲

Care to share yours?

I'm rubbish with names and accents.

It's not intentional, with names I'll get the first letters right but the rest of it completely wrong Sandra Long in my head will be something will Sarah Land and it will stick.

Accents I don't have an ear for them, and after asking someone to repeat themselves twice I'll give up which comes across rude in itself. It's not even because I don't spend time with them my dGDad who I loved dearly and spent lots of time with had a thick rural Irish accent and I'd often just nod along and pretend I understood what he said.

To be fair, I also have trouble with the TV and have the subtitles on a lot so might actually be an ear problem.

I interrupt during conversations.

Terrible at telling anecdotes/relaying back info etc cos I don't pay attention in the first place.

Find it hard to be interested in meeting new people. Since having kids it's easier but i get anxious and I really never know what to ask people about themselves.

Spend money at the drop of a hat without thinking about the consequences

Really naturally a messy/untidy person. The effort to clean kills me

What does that mean? Genuinely interested as similar personality type.

I'm so confident in decisions I make relating to my lifestyle, I'm borderline arrogant.

I lack empathy and think a lot of people's hardships are brought on themselves through bad decision making.

Oh god, same!

Sounds like me, perfect!

I hold a grudge to the extent I will find out peoples weakness if they have upset me and get revenge by using the weakness against them. I know this is wrong and I’m always telling myself to stop but I get a lot of satisfaction doing it. Recent example is my best friends daughter was bullied so bad she tried to commit suicide. I found out her bully was someone who didn’t want to tell their parents they were gay and I outed them to their entire family

Oh well, they won't be bullying anyone again then will they!! If you push someone to the brink of suicide you face the consequences.

I struggle to see anything from other points of view. I think I'm right about everything, I can be a gossip, I can be moody, I have an addictive personality, I struggle with empathy for others, the only person I love in the whole world is my child.

@MySocksAreDotty I've just finished reading an extraordinary book that helps with negative mentality, feel the fear and do it anyway. Highly recommend!

”Secret, and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster” or at least a tendency that way which I have to fight every day.

I hold a grudge. I move on by removing myself from the person. Thinking about it like this, it’s not such a negative trait, it’s healthy to have boundaries. But I could be more forgiving, I guess.

@Boydd wow! That could have been devastating for the other person, though I understand the desire for revenge. Are we talking adults or teens? I’m also a grudge holder, though just seethe internally and cut ties.

I really struggle with managing my anger, it's the thing I like least about myself. Stress is a trigger.

I'm very impatient.

Enabler

@Singleandproud I think you should get your hearing checked! I only realised I needed hearing aids after moaning aloud multiple times that everyone was mumbling. I still have to do the 'smile and wave' sometimes when I have no idea what people are saying, even with hearing aids in, but at least I know why. Sometimes I have smiled at bad news, which is mortifying.

I can be bitter and jealous, and I don't let go of grudges easily.

For me I went through a lot of trauma and after I started to deal with it I ended up going NC with my family. I gave them a lot of chances to address the issues, they choose to carpet sweep so I shut the door on them and it is permanently shut on my end. Then as I was recovering I had two separate friends who were absolutely draining the life out of me as I was going through the whole experience. They had their own issues but they constantly vented to me and didn’t realise their own part in the issues they were having so I listened to the same stuff over and over. I tried to address the fact I was being drained directly with them and they were completely oblivious as the relationship was absolutely suiting them and meeting their needs so again separately I told them I couldn’t sustain the relationship's and finished the friendships. Again once the door is shut it doesn’t open for me. I don’t hate or even dislike any of these people. The relationships are just burnt out from my end. It is pretty brutal. After I did it I read somewhere about INFJ door slam and it described to a tee the whole experience.

This thread is really interesting!

My toxic trait is extreme procrastination and then absolutely loathing myself for it but I just can't stop it

I take things too seriously at times.... most of the time

Inertia (others have referred to laziness, but I feel this describes me better)
Intransigence
Lack of organisation
Procrastination

There are loads more, but these are the worst, the ones that affect my life and relationships most.

Sometimes I can't think of any positive traits about myself to be honest. Except my sense of fairness!

Oh god, that’s me.

Intolerance, irritability ( but I think I'm stressed), impatience,

Impulsiveness. I get this feeling I think of as 'the mustard' where all reason and logic go out the window and I just go into self sabotage mode.
Hyper focus. Once I start I can't stop.
Terrible time management. I'm late to everything. Overly optimistic about what I can do before leaving the house or the last visit. It's very unprofessional.
I get annoyed at people who don't push themselves out of their comfort zone or try to be more independent. I should be more empathetic when others tell me they're anxious.
Thinking everyone is ND.
No tolerance for men really. I think I am sexist.