What is the cheekiest thing someone has asked of you?

[Conniebygaslight]

There have been many but reading on another thread about the CFery of a school mum reminded me of a time when my DC were at primary.
A mum asked if I’d mind picking her DC up from school and taking them to another school a few miles away where they were competing in an intersports thing. My DC were competing too so I agreed assuming she was working.
When we got there, said mum was already there in the front row with her DH & DPs. I asked what was going on, she replied that they wanted a good seat and parking so didn’t want to wait until their DC finished school so they could get their first. I was absolutely stunned…I still laugh at the audacity of this years later🤣🤣

I gather that its one of the key beliefs of incels.

They certainly seem to think so.

I'm rarely lost for words but I just stood there trying to work out if I had just had an epic auditory verbal hallucination or had actually just been asked to lend a bloke my vagina.

Are you a writer?

🤣 I used to do the star signs for the college magazine when I was a student. Does that count?

Heck yeah!

I've had a lousy few days and this has made me laugh so hard.

Finally made my way to the end of the thread! I don’t seem to have encountered too many CFs, thank goodness as I don’t think I’d be very good at standing up to them. Do have an example where I did tho:

My dad had terminal cancer, it was the second time he’d had cancer and the first time I’d been quite open about it at work but the second time I had only told one co worker as I didn’t want people asking me about it.

One day, about three months after his diagnosis and two months before he died, another co worker came up to me and started asking what I was doing about my dad’s kayaks as “he’s not using them is he?” I acted all confused and said “what do you mean? He’s out on them every weekend!” knowing damn well he hadn’t been strong enough to go out on a kayak in months. She went red and just sort of stuttered some random excuse and went off cos she couldn’t say why she thought he wasn’t using them without either dropping our other co worker in it or admitting she’d been ear wigging. I know it’s easy to assume my other co worker blabbed and I’ve not ruled it out, but this lady was notorious for being nosy and knowing things she shouldn’t so who knows. But either way, the poor sod hadn’t even died yet!! Who goes and asks a dying man’s daughter for his possessions?! We did sell them, after he died and when we felt emotionally able to, but not to her!

Oh wait no, remembered another - over a year after my ex dumped me I realised he’d still been using my Amazon prime to watch stuff! I’m not sure how often he’d been doing it as I deleted his account before thinking to check the watch history. I found out because he watched something on the main account so when I went to carry on my binge of Buffy I saw some random football documentary. Not sure if it was a one off or he’d been doing it the whole time and just finally slipped up and watched something on the mai. I was blocked on everything so couldn’t have it out with him, just had to get satisfaction from imagining him trying to log on and realising he couldn’t. Bastard.

Last one from me, I think…

Years ago we moved to a European country where, at that time, it was not unusual for rental properties to be empty. The bathroom fittings were there, but only a sink in the kitchen, no curtain poles, blinds, light fittings.

The previous tenants were still moving out while we stayed in a hotel, waiting for our furniture to arrive in the country.

We started getting messages from them. Should add here the wife was extremely nervous and they’d added safety features.

Did we want to buy the bullet proof glass they had on the front entrance?

Did we want to buy the window locks?

Did we want to buy the blinds on the attic room windows?

They were asking a fortune for these things and we had to buy a full kitchen and appliances for a start. So the answer was no to each question.

They took the bulletproof glass. Locked all the windows and took the keys. Took the made to measure blinds. Well, 3 out of 4 blinds. They couldn’t remove the mechanism for the last one so just cut off the material. We moved in during June and couldn’t open the windows. Once their goods were gone we could see their dog chewed a massive hole in the Lino in the centre of the room.

The landlord thought we should pay for removing the old flooring, there was another huge amount expected for getting rid of the old lino, and then replacement flooring. AND took us to a kitchen design place who designed a 16000 euro kitchen for us. We said no to all of it. Bought the kitchen from a DIY type place and bought large rugs to cover the lino.

Years later we were moving out and the house had been sold, then we had to tell the new landlord the damage was from the people before us. Thankfully the old landlord backed us up.

That song loses a lot of its impact when you realise just how far "only" 24 hours from Tulsa actually is.

Nothing really to match the full CFery of some on here but here's my story.

Background: we live in a "conversion" - our house is the upper half of a large Victorian villa and we share the driveway with our downstairs' neighbours. The back garden is split left and right: our only access to the garden (the left side) is through a gate which technically only we had a right of access to. They had a conservatory and kitchen to the right which was their access to the garden. Front garden was shared.

Glasgow City Council added garden (brown) and recycling (blue) big bins to the green ones, which meant that we now had to find somewhere for six bins between the two households When it had been two bibs, we were ok with them being at the bottom of the wee slope going up to our side of the garden (through the gate). When they added the brown bins, it was getting a bit congested to get into our garden, so got them to mostly look after their brown bin (as we tended to share garden waste), and then when we also got the blue bins, we started putting "our" brown bin on the path round the back, on our side. It was close up their dd's bedroom but not really visible unless she stood in her window and looked to the left. They kept on moving it across to the area outside our sheds (one of which they used) which was our only access to the garden.

We asked them if we could put the bins down at the bottom of the driveway (still hidden from the road by a hedge and a holly tree). They said we couldn't because, "That's what the Asians do" We genuinely couldn't respond because we were so gobsmacked. Their proposed solution was that we tell the council to take away the blue bins as the council didn't recycle the plastic, paper, cardboard and tins anyway

We said we were keeping our blue bin and they would need to find somewhere for all of their bins on their side of the house. We then kept our blue and green bins opposite our front door - ie much more visible from the road.

They moved shortly afterwards and sold to a lovely pair of GPs (she's white Scottish and he's Scottish Asian although the departing neighbours had said he was Malaysian ). And guess where our bins are now

BTW: we do live in an area with a high proportion of very nice Asians, but where the bins are is a function not of the ethnicity but of whether or how the houses & driveways have been split.

There are actually now eight wheely bins down at the bottom of the drive as they added slightly narrower purple bins to the collection. And the Council is adding a grey bin to the schedule later in the year (we - both households - are going to have to work out how to organise them so that they fit below the cars but we share their use so will cope).

There are other stories I could tell like how they tried to sell one of our coal sheds to the new people, even though we'd formally notified them that it was ours and that we wanted them to take their stuff out of the shed that they'd been using (and in fact, after they left and had taken off their padlock, we found we'd had the key to its original lock all along).

Fortunately we get on really well with our not so new neighbours - even though the very first conversation we had with them was "Yes, we do have the key to that shed and no, we're not giving it to you" which was exactly the conversation we'd told our old neighbours that we didn't want to have to have We did however let them put a shed up to the side of the front of the house (so not really visible) for their bikes.

New guy started at my husband's job. In the first week he caused some minor issues and inconveniences by being an idiot, but hopefully they were teething errors.

He was supposed to be working on Saturday. Didn't show up. Apparently he quit that morning via text message to the owner.

Three months later, guess who shows up one weekend and asks for his job back 😂

Just remembered another one.... I was in the supermarket and spotted some reduced sausages - probably half price so a good very deal.

There was one packet of lamb ones and others that were beef or pork or whatever. I took the lamb ones and put them in my basket.

This man appears next to me, spots the ones still in the fridge, looks into my basket and sees I got the one packet of lamb ones and starts saying in a very loud, tragic tone, "Oh, you got the lamb sausages!! My daughter loves lamb sausages! She really does..."

Clearly expecting me to activate female socialisation and give this nice father my half price lamb sausages for his "daughter", who loves them, not realising I've been on Mumsnet for years and no longer fall for such nonsense.

"Oh, does she?" I said and walked off.

A few years ago I decided to sell my unwanted clothes and shoes on ebay. I put up for sale a pair of black converse trainers that were quite a narrow fit. Hence the reason for their sale. A woman emailed me asking about the fit and I replied honestly saying they were narrow and a tighter fit so if she had wider feet they’d be no good. She ended up buying them. I duly shipped them to her.

A few days later I got an angry email accusing me of selling counterfeit goods and that she was going to report me to ebay. She attached loads of photos to ‘prove’ her point and had actually torn out the inner soles to claim the glue used was not in line with how these trainers were manufactured. She demanded her money back or she would report me. I was so scared of being reported for selling fake goods that I refunded her straight away and paid to have the trainers returned to me. They ended up going to my local charity shop.

Those trainers were not fake. I bought them at a reputable shop. I knew deep down she didn’t want them because her feet were too wide and made up this vicious allegation to make me give her a refund. If she’s reading this and recognises herself, shame on you and your large trotters. If you had emailed me and been truthful and said you’d made a mistake I would have refunded you anyway less the postage.

Never sold anything on ebay again.

@mrschocolatte that’s awful that she did that, but “shame on you and your large trotters” did make me laugh

I sold a skirt on Vinted for £3 and the buyer reported me for the listing being significantly different from description. I'd said it was blue when it was in fact brown. As proof she had attached the same picture I had listed it with, but with a sepia filter applied to change the colour! She couldn’t even be bothered to take her own photo to edit it! I know moneys tight for everyone right now, but if you're that hard up for £3 maybe don't go clothes shopping!

I gave away a pair of expensive winter boots that were too small for my DD on fb marketplace. They were in excellent condition. Woman who wanted them was the mum of another child in DD’s class. I was surprised to hear from here as she was always rude at school gate, blanked me or never said hello. I offered to send the boots with my DD, she took them to school and gave them to her DD. She never got in touch again to say thanks (also has my WhatsApp) and kept on blanking me at the school hate. Stupid cow. Blocked her on fb so she can’t see my marketplace posts anymore (we were never fb friends anyway).

My ex wanted to take my dd on holiday with his gf. I had never met her at this point although he had met my on/off bf of a year. I asked ex if I could meet his gf before any holiday, as I wanted to know who my dd would be spending time with (as it would be her caring for dd). He said we could meet at a coffee shop that his gf chooses, with her mother and friend present, but I had to come alone unless I ran it by him who I was taking so he could say if this was ok. He told me I had to pay for lunch as it was my idea and there would be four of them meeting me alone in the cafe for this chat.

we didn’t meet up that time. Instead he brought her to my door without warning on my DDs birthday, her and all her kids. He was a real nightmare and thank god she is grown now and I never have to speak with this prize again.

i think he was worried I would tell her the truth, as he is a known liar, so he sabotaged any meeting points in case we really had time to talk.

*Accipe · Yesterday 14:01

^Anyway, how far is it from New York to Vancouver? Anyone know?
Is that New York, New York or New York near Bolton, Greater Manchester?^

It's the one by Shiremoor, in North Tyneside.

I sold a brand new kipling handbag on ebay at the time when they went for good money. The buyer came back to me questioning that it was new as it had "white powder" in the pockets. No option but to refund of course and when it came back, sure enough white powder...it wasn't talc or chalk, it did dissolve in water. I hoped it was bicarb and put it through the washing machine several times before selling it on as used. I still wonder what the powder was and why she did it........

I had that recently. Went to the supermarket to buy my mam a birthday cake with my daughters. There was a woman there with her daughter and a baby in a pram effectively blocking off the cake aisle so I told my girls to wait back until they’d finished. They finally moved off to the side and the girls spotted a lovely Thornton chocolate cake on the bottom shelf (the only one) and announce that’s the one. Picked it up off the shelf and the woman spots me and says “oh I never saw that one, it’s exactly what I was looking for” with sad puppy dog eyes. Eh says I, they’ll probably have it in another shop and walked off. Like what was she expecting. That we would just hand over the cake that two children had picked because she couldn’t see it in her 5 minutes of perusing

He probably hoped you would offer to adopt her!!

I'm filing away "Shame on you and your large trotters" for general use against idiots, whether it describes their feet or not 😁

I’m not sure if this counts or not but I recently was an idiot and bought a pair of vest tops that have the shelf / cups inside so no bra is required off. It said it was a Uk company, had Uk website etc. it came from china. I tried to get it on. Nope. I’m a lady with the same proportions as Queen Victoriain her later years. It was supposed to be a size 30 Uk. Well the cups were easily a A cup and looked like nipple tassels! My norks were not going to fit in there, the t-shirt was easily a 14-16 at most. So I tried to return them. No address in website, you had to go through an AI assistant thing and they said it would take too long to return so I should just give them as a gift! CFs. I now have put in a claim with PayPal and I then noticed they had overcharged me by £4 too. Edited for spelling. It’s Norks not Norms autocorrect.

Same here!

I cannot for the life of me begin to understand the brain processes of people who buy things online, having been clearly told (or seeing in the listed details/dimensions) that an item is not suitable for their needs... but they think they know better than physics and go ahead and buy it anyway, only to be shocked, outraged and angry when they realise that they have in fact bought exactly what they were told they would be buying if they chose to make the purchase.

There really are no words.

I'm so sorry for what you have endured. I have similar family myself and know what you mean about the emotional difficulty of cutting off someone - it is a bereavement; grief for the relationship you should have had, but didn't.