Do you know anyone in their 90s who lives at home independently?

[Meltingchocolate]

I know one person in their 90s who lives at home and has carers four times a day. He can’t go out alone and depends on a wheelchair.

I know one couple who are quite independent and still mobile eg do all their own shopping. They don’t need carers but they help each other.

It was part of a discussion with my elderly parents (early 80s) where they assumed that most people in their 90s would be living in a care home. I was wondering how common it is for people in their 90s to still live in their own home?

That’s incredible! What’s her secret?

My grandmother is 99, lives independently in her own home. She does all chores and errands herself except the heavy gardening for which she has a gardener. She still drives but only locally now and relies on her children various who live around the UK for trips away.

My mother in law is almost 92. She still lives independently and keeps her house very clean and tidy.

She still drives, she's very mentally alert with a great sense of humour and has an active social life, with lunch dates and trips to the theatre at least once a week. She has an active role in the village church and is chairman of her local residents' association. She's always up to date with all the village gossip too, which she loves to share with me :)

She has her hair shampooed and set once a week and her nails done every fortnight. She's always perfectly made-up and dresses beautifully.

She's been through some very tough times, but always stays strong and positive. Her previously healthy DH had an unexpected stroke and spent the following 15 years severely disabled. She was his main carer for twelve years before social services said he had to be moved into a care home when she injured her shoulder one day, while trying to help him into his wheelchair. That was a relief to me and DH, as she wouldn't have agreed to it otherwise, but the decision was taken out of her hands. She went to visit him at the care home every day until he passed away.

In her early eighties she spent many months in hospital being treated with high doses of chemo for aggressive bone cancer and had a double hip replacement (after which she had to learn to walk again). She now always deliberately parks five or ten minute walk away from wherever she's driven to, whenever she can.

Her son (my late DH) died of cancer and she was a great support to me and my DC during his illness and after his death, despite having her own grief to deal with.

She's embraced technology and uses her laptop to email and order online shopping without any problems. She also loves to keep up to date with everyone's news on Facebook.

I love her sense of humour, her no-nonsense approach to life and her positive attitude. She is such an amazing role model for me and my DC, and we always look forward to seeing her.

Yes, my dad until he was 92, two relatives of a friend, one 98 and the other 94.

My grandma was exactly like @FiveShelties mum. Completely independent until she had a fall

My parents have a friend (well he was my dads boss back in the 1980s) in his 90s and he went into a care home after an illness, about two years ago. He hated it so much and decided he’d rather die in his own bed. He has four sons but they don’t live nearby, so arranged for care to come in once a day. Amazingly he got stronger as soon as he was home, and is managing independently. He does his own cooking and cleaning, and my parents say his house is spotless. They go to see him once a week.

Friends Mum lives at home and is 104. She is really amazing, likes to have her hair and nails done once a week and is always up for going out to a nice pub for Sunday lunch

My father is 90 walks 5 km a day (or more), shops, cooks, entertains, does his own laundry. Has a gardener though and a cleaner come in. Mum died last year and she was worried he wouldn't manage ..tbh he manages better than she did at 83 (year of her death)Drives long distance and short distance. Travels with friends for pleasure. Public speaking on occasion.

FIL has a cleaner once a week and bottled water delivered (Europe) but otherwise does all cooking and shopping himself.

Secret is exercise, friendship and jobs/projects.

I know someone who is only in her early 80s but cared for her partner with dementia until he entered palliative care. He was fit and strong and needed two carers in respite. She provided all personal care, while doing all her own cooking and housework, including all the laundry (a lot). She keeps a vegetable garden (except for in his last year) and chops firewood. She doesn't drive so had family shop for her, though she'll be able to do much of it locally again now.

My dad, 92, lives in his own home, the one he's lived in since 1959. Three years ago he became ill, and needed attention. I went round to do that and have been there almost every day since. So he's home, alone, but not really independent. I do the cooking (what there is, he doesn't want much to eat), the cleaning, shopping, washing, admin.

DPs dad is 92 and his mum is 84. His dad is the most spritely and does all the shopping and plays golf still although goes round in a buggy now. His mum doesn't go out any more but does the cooking, washing and housework.
My dads friend is 99 and lives at home on his own. He can manage his washing self care and can push the Hoover about, but he cant cook for toffee so his daughter bring him his meals. He has had a few falls and fell asleep in the shower on his stool and flooded the bathroom, so he needs a close eye keeping on him.

Two of my grandparents did (one until they died at over 100!), also DH's Granny lived at home until she died late 90s but did have carers for the last couple of years.
I think most people in their 90s would at least need help with cleaning and shopping but definitely not unheard of to be still living at home.

My family member is 96 and lives independently.

She has no carers. We do the heavy shopping for her. But she will pop out herself to get lighter bits of shopping.

@Meltingchocolate

Yes, my elderly female relative (98), as did all her brothers who also lived well into late-90's either independantly, or together with similarly aged spouses.
(Truly representing the 'Greatest Generation')
All led active lives walking briskly for as long as able.

She sadly passed just before her 99th birthday, purely as an indirect casualty of Covid lockdown.
(Entered hospital following injury to shoulder, hospital stay extended due to lockdown with no visits allowed, and contracted pnumonia whilst in there, never to return home.)
Otherwise, would have fully anticipated her remaining active until early 100s.

Until then she lived independantly in her own home, had begun getting a regular Tesco delivery, and only recently (reluctantly) had a carer pop in twice daily for a 'welfare check' rather than to provide any physical care duties (family weren't nearby following her last house move where she chose to live her latter years).

I doubt I've inherited all her good genes, but can hope.

Yes. My mother. Lives alone and is absolutely fine. Her only problem is that she can't drive since the optician told her not to last year. She's trying out online shopping though - we're talking her through it atm, but she'll get there.
She uses Amazon a lot, does online banking...

Our previous neighbours who we are friends with, he turned 90 this year, very fit goes to aqua aerobics at the gym, (only gave up horse riding two years ago as he had a tumble).
Works part time as a trouble shooter for various haulage firms, still drives, and has taken over the running of the household as his wife is not in the best of health, though she is 89.
I think he is bloody marvellous!

My grandmother did - to 96 - she had cleaning help and meals on wheels at the end, but not before.

At my golf club there are at least 5 people in their 90s playing. Two with absolutely no buggy and they all played through the Winter.
Yesterday l was at a wedding and the grooms Granny..92 was there all day chatting to all the guests..not sitting in a little corner . She was up and about joining different groups chatting. She lives by herself and has no obvious help except her family who are close by.

A family friend and also a NDN in their mid nineties live at home, still drive and volunteer. To talk to them you'd easily knock 20 years off of both their age.
We also recently celebrated a 90th birthday of a member of my toughest aqua fit class. She's always been a runner (county level when young), has had 2 hip replacements, only recently gave up tennis. She's bloody awesome and as fit as people 30 years younger.
Another 93 yo friend however has recently been diagnosed with dementia and you can see his world is shrinking 😢

My 91 year old neighbour has just completed the London Marathon, walking at a good pace and completing in under 8 hrs

My gran did, she lived by herself till she died at 96. My mum did her grocery shopping and popped in most days, but unless Gran was ill then it was as much to give her company as anything else. A neighbour used to take her out for afternoon tea sometimes. She still cooked for herself, cleaned, crotcheted, did crosswords, and grew tomatoes in her greenhouse.

My Dad. 92. Still plays golf.

I have 95 year old aunt who still lives independently. She has no carers, but some ad-hoc support from neighbours and less regular support from family (nephews and nieces, none of whom live nearby).

I also know two sisters in their 90s who live together with no carers but some family support with eg shopping. The younger one is 90. The older one is 95 or 96.

My grandma lived independently on her own til she was 100. No carers/home helps or cleaners.

She did get things like home visits from doctors, nurses, chiropodists as needed.

Her radius of travel started to reduce after she was about 80.

At that point she would go on trips on coaches to neighbouring town/cities with her sisters. She had about 100 mile radius.

At about 85 she would travel within the city herself, on foot, by bus or in a taxi.

By 90 she would do a round trip of about a mile in foot (Markies Food Hall) and go in cars driven by a family member.

A couple of years past that and the foot journeys reduced to the local Co-op which was about a five minute walk, the paper shop round the corner or the baker at the end of the street. The bulk of her shopping was done by family though who dropped it in.

Family dropped in with shopping a couple of times a week.

At 95, she pretty much stopped going out on foot and would only go out to family houses with someone to help her get and out of the car, plus up and down the stairs to her flat. Family dropped by with shopping and her neighbour would pick up things like milk and bread for her.

During a family crisis (serious illness) when she was 98 she managed to get up to the baker shop at the end of the street to get milk and bread and the ladies behind the counter told her just to phone if she needed anything and someone would pop down with it either when they were quiet or on their way home. Never charged her for anything.

All that time she did her own cleaning, washing, cooking etc. She had the place redecorated at 80 and said that would have to do, she couldn’t be bothered with the upheaval again.

She lived in a home for the last few months as the home visitor was concerned for her safety. She had a fall in the home and died soon after.

Never should have left the flat she’d been in for over thirty years, she just didn’t adapt to the new physical environment whereas her own place she knew like the back of her hand.

Both my grandmothers did until they died at 96 and 97.

Should have added that they have all been fairly active well into their late 80s.