Is this what working in your 40s like or am I just a fatty?

[Frequency]

Obviously, I've worked before but from home for the last 6 years. My work routine was to get up 5 minutes before I started work, stumble to my desk, and then make a coffee and make myself vaguely presentable after handing over from the last shift. The only walking involved was to the kettle and back.

Now I am working outside the home, my day involves getting up at 5 am to shower, style my hair and make my lunch, walking to the bus stop, walking from the bus stop to the next bus stop, and walking from that bus stop to my workplace.

Once I get to work I walk from job to job around the estate as issues are reported, sometimes carrying equipment, up and down millions of flights of stairs, and then I repeat the bus trip home, usually getting home at 8 pm. By the time I've walked the dog, I am usually too tired to eat dinner and just drag myself to bed.

I've gotten up today to sort the garden, clean the kitchen, spend time with the dog and catch up on all the college work I should have done during the week but I ache. Everything aches. My knees ache, my thighs ache, my elbows and shoulders ache, my feet and ankles and back hurt and all I wanna do is curl up in front of Netflix with a bottle of wine and then go back to bed.

Is this what life is now? Do I live in a constant state of exhaustion and pain or will my body get used to my new job and adjust?

Forgot to mention I am over 50 and struggled for was OK after a few months

This is my day. It’s exhausting and I have never got used to it. I go to bed very early. We plan to change jobs soon.

I would invest in a daily dog walker for a start and enjoy longer walks at the weekend. You need a bath and to unwind as soon as you are home. Ditto cleaner and outsource everything for a while. Weekends are sacrosanct too.

Be grateful!! Before I left work to have DCs I used to get up at 6, catch a train at 7, walk a brisk 25 mins to the office, walk up and down stairs throughout the day and across the city to our various offices, back to the station and home by about 6.30. OK better hours than you - but I never had to worry about keeping fit, it was just built into my life. Did that for 12 years and left in my early 40s.

Fast forward 15 years, I was a SAHM since leaving that job (apart from a very part time admin job locally) and have become so podgy and unfit. I'm not a gym or sports person so having a lifestyle that does it for you automatically is such a bonus.

I appreciate it must be hard if you aren't used to it - but you soon will be, and I'm sure you'll really appreciate it! (Do see if you can reduce the hours though.......)

OP I was like this after lockdown and no commuting for a year or longer. My feet, knees etc ached from going up and down a couple of flights of stairs on the underground etc. Your body will get used to it. Also, WFH is easier on the mind. I'm a lot more exhausted after an office day due to all the people and noise on the tube bus etc. again, it will go away over time.

Re the making lunch, at the weekend, you could make all your sandwiches for the week at the weekend and freeze. I do this often, however if I have eg chicken and salad and the salad obviously doesn't freeze, I make fresh or freeze with just the chicken, get the next day's out and plonk in the fridge when home from work, add the salad leaves next morning when it's thawed enough to add them.

Old person you’ve just been really rude and unkind on another thread as well. Are you attention seeking?

Go to your GP. You sound peri Menopausal. You can have very low energy and general body ache due to fluctuating hormones.
Starting HRT can be life changing.
go to the ‘Balance’app for further information on it.

You will get used to it but it will be a grind. I'm almost 57 and would have done your schedule with ease 10 years ago.
Now not at all. Menopause is the proverbial...protect your health, your joints, your sanity!
Don't know what women think they have to prove. Do the minimum that gets you through at a level you set for yourself.
Sounds a little unsustainable in my view

Look at ECCO shoes or Reiker if you don't get on with Docs. I find them heavy and it's taking ages for them to get comfy. It sounds like your body is getting used to having an active role. I suspect you will lose weight which will take the pressure off your joints too.

It probably isn't sustainable in the long term so hopefully you'll pass your driving test which will give you more time to eat properly and make a huge difference to your commute.

I don’t mean to sound blunt but I don’t think it’s being 40 or working that is the problem. Being 22 stone is not good for you at all!

I suggest you reread that post

Did it not occur to you that a 22 stone woman would be highly unlikely to be able to manage such an active day at all?

Sorry but you've answered your question, being blunt. It will only get easier, but you are doing a very long working day with the commute.

Putting aside your weight, some of it will be adjustment to being more physical and some of it'll be down to the volume of physical work you're doing. Those that have fitbits at work say we do a minimum of 8,000 a day, we're on our feet all day, lifting, bending - the canteen and toilets are on the top floor and at far end of building and we have to use stairs.

I had lots of orders to process yesterday morning, fasting walking just about everywhere to collect products, I can't imagine how many steps I did - all I know is that my ankles and feet hurt like crazy - it's warm in the building this time of year, so add to that swollen legs, I felt uncomfortable last night. I'm 57 and average weight, but still gets to me and even those that are around 20.

Fitflops are good and so are ecco shoes.
Saved me when working on my feet all day on a marble floor.

In my 30s I worked in a job on my feet all day. 3 days a week it was a long shift 8am til 9pm, the rest of the week it was 8-6. On the long shift days a bath was essential when I got home as my knees and hips hurt so much from being on my feet all day. I was a normal weight, fit and healthy.
In my late 20s I had 5am starts, a long train commute, an office job that was 8am till 6pm, train home for 8/8.30pm. bed by 10pm latest. I burnt out from that one after a couple of years and had to make some drastic changes to recover.
I suspect it's lots of things combined. Your weight wont be helping, but those early starts are a killer. You will get fitter quite quickly and things will get easier as the weight reduces too. Do make sure you nourish yourself though.

I agree with PPs that you should reduce the time in the morning and prioritise a bit more sleep until you are driving and can reduce that commute. Get a thermos and take your morning coffee on the bus. Get a shower head that is better for low pressure/increases pressure so hair washing is shorter. Don't blow dry, use hair grips to pull straight and let it dry like that.

Painkillers if you have to but I would worry a little about forming a habit. Paracetamol and aspirin are safer than ibuprofen and cocodemol. Hot baths are great, but if no time then foot massagers/vibration cushions are brilliant.

Hotter do walking boots that look like normal lace up boots, often in the sale. Supportive innersoles can make all the difference too and would be cheaper. Check out walking shops like Cotswold outdoor for that type of thing. I personally really rate fitflop shoes and trainers if I've got a long day on my feet, only ever buy in the sales though as they are expensive.

Food wise, prioritise protein to help your muscles recover. Prep breakfast, lunch and dinner the night before. Breakfast can also be eaten on the bus and consider if you could take all 3 meals with you so you are using the dead time on the bus to nourish yourself. Is there a kitchen at work, a microwave? Soup is fast and healthy.
Boiled eggs in batches so there's always some to grab for a quick snack or ready for party of a meal.

Figure out what you can tweak. Outsource what you can afford to and make some compromises until you are driving and have a bit more time. You can do this.

Your mum is a gem and it's lovely to come home to a joyful doggo isn't it. All the best.

Congratulations OP, you are doing a job you like and it’s going to do so much good for your health and mental health. It’s a super-long day and the commute is something you can do without but it has spurred you on to learn to drive which will give you great freedom and flexibility so that’s already a win.
If I were you, I’d adjust my mindset and use this job as an opportunity to get myself in shape. See it like a sort of boot camp you get paid for.
The weight will drop off you if you keep this up. I had to shadow some traffic wardens for a piece I was writing (I’m a journalist) and they all said their health had improved enormously with a job that had them walking all day. One had bad knees which cleared up over a few months. But the right footwear was essential. They all had boots which needed breaking in. (Google footwear for traffic wardens)
You are going to end up feeling fitter and healthier than ever. Losing the weight before the menopause is easier than trying to do it afterwards. I’d invest in a cheap pair of scales. It will be so motivating when you see you are losing weight. Keep a banana or two in your bag for instant energy. Push on with the driving lessons. Reducing the commute will make a big difference, especially as winter approaches. Your energy levels will rise soon as your body gets used to the exercise and don’t underestimate the tiredness factor involved in settling into any new job. Good luck with it.

I would suggest doing a batch cookmat the weekend to make sure you are eating better. You can tub them up in takeaway containers and just pull one out of the freezer to defrost each day.

I do this with chilli, curries, leftover chicken/ roasties (the cook up veg on the night and batch cook jacket potatoes. This way you will still be getting nutrition but quickly and not by grabbing less healthy foods as that will just make you feel more sluggish

Are you drinking enough water throughout the day?

I am the same size and have trouble with my joints, I am working on my diet but found Turmeric a great help with the joint pain

I'm just concerned about the dog surely you don't leave it alone all day until 8pm that is an awfully long time

Read back. The dog is well looked after, I assure you.

On top of my mum visiting three times a day I also have DD1 who is unwell and doesn't leave the house but cannot be relied upon to leave her room (she does sometimes) and DD2 who is at college a minutes walk away from our home and who often comes home between lessons and finishes college by 4 pm. She does sit with the dog when she's here.

My mum comes to check in on DD1 and help out in the house as much as spend time with the dog.

I'm going to look into all the suggestions for shoes later so thank you for those.

OP I would get trainers over boots every time, unless you really need the ankle support.

For comfort and back/joint health, one of the most important things is that your footwear is as light as possible.

I recommend Asics running trainers - they are so much cheaper than other good ones, and they have a lovely wide comfy footbed and always do the job for me. But you could also look into Hoka Cliftons (I think these are similar to Asics road runners but they have very good reviews) or Hoka Bondi (massive 'rocking' sole, not for me but they work for some).

You might have to pay a bit more to get appropriate colour ones (they are always cheaper in the bright colours than in plain black).